So here’s the story–
I go to a school where every class is small seminar style. I’m a first semester freshman and have been in a bout of health things (mental&physical health–severe anxiety plus hormone things which turned into concern about potential cancer for a hot sec which did nothing but worsen my anxiety). Also had a #metoo moment over the summer and with all the kavanaugh things plus some metoo moments with people i know over here that was sort of rehashed and worsened mental state even more!
Finally got past the panic about my physical health and the boy mostly via preparation to transfer to a music conservatory cause that’s my dream but I’ve been generally anxious and avoidant and irresponsible when it comes to the school i’m actually currently attending and one of my classes has taken a serious hit. I considered withdrawing and was about to do it but talked to the professor and she seemed to think I should stay and just try to get back on track.
it’s a few weeks later and past the withdrawal deadline and I’ve gotten even further off track. I haven’t attended basically any of the classes or turned in any of the assignments on time. it’s a small seminar class so attendance and preparation is a huge huge chunk of the grade. The professor has encouraged me over and over to remain in communication with her about what’s going on with me and after missing three classes in a row I haven’t because i don’t even know how to explain to her what’s going on in my head without it turning very needlessly emotional and i don’t know that anything going on in my head really justifies how much i’m neglecting this class. I do well on the assignments when I turn them in because it’s a subject i’m fairly good at, but I’m falling behind again with an assignment due today.
I’m going to fail the class. If I were the professor I wouldn’t even think about passing me.
it’s too late to withdraw so my options are pretty much to withdraw/fail or try to get a D in the class which might not even be possible at this point.
withdraw/fail would entail receiving technically NOT an F on my transcript but still having the F factored into my gpa.
i’m trying to transfer and yeah it’s to a conservatory but i don’t know if i can really get in anywhere with such a low GPA or an F on my transcript. also i get a fairly generous academic scholarship that i’ll absolutely lose if i fail a class.
so i’m feeling generally kind of screwed and hopeless and terrible and i’m about to skip this class i’m going to fail. again
please help if you have advice should i just keep turning in assignments late and try to get a D or should i take the withdraw/fail