I’m starting at a new school and living in an apartment; I have three roommates, and none of them had seen it before we moved in. One roommate arrived early and moved into the biggest bedroom without asking how we wanted to divvy it up. because “she had a lot of stuff”. I found that annoying, but I let it slide-after all, it’s a bedroom.
Today when we were Facebook chatting, the topic of TVs came up. I said that I had one I was going to put in my room (I prefer to watch TV to unwind before I sleep. The same roommate asked me to put it in the living room so they could all use it, not just me and the girl I’ll be sharing a room with. I said I’d prefer not to, but I could in a jam. One of my other roommates said they had a 24’ they could bring for the living room, but mine is a lot bigger so I feel guilty about that. I’m already bringing most of the common items for the apartment, so I feel likely they want a common TV, they should go ahead and buy one.
What’s the best way to set boundaries with them without coming off as rude?
Ordinarily, I would say that you shouldn’t give in on the TV to avoid being a doormat.
But if you’re sharing a bedroom, watching TV just before bed may not be possible because it would annoy your roommate, especially if she goes to sleep earlier than you do or needs to study in the evening. So maybe putting the TV in the living room would be better.
But it would be a good idea to get the others to compromise and share about something. Might someone be able to supply a video game system, for example, for everyone to share? If you have a large TV in the living room, having a game system hooked up to it is fun. Or, if you’re going to supply the TV, can the others pay for the cable?
The people in the other room will probably agree to this, knowing that when the time comes, everyone is likely to consider it more trouble than it’s worth.
Not only do they want to split cable four ways, they want me to chip in n the tv stand. I told them that I was going to put it on my bureau, and since it’s going in the living room, theu should buy the stand
Agree that roommate ground rules should be set as soon as everyone arrives, and the discussion of rotating rooms mid-year should be addressed. As for your tv, thank her for the suggestion, but let her know you brought it to, and plan to keep it in your room. Nothing further to discuss.
Haha we’re all girls! Maybe it’s just because she was so forward with it-the girl who asked me to bring the tv hasn’t purchased anything for the apartment and decided to take the largest bedroom without talking to us about it. My initial desire was to tell her that a 32 inch tv would cost her about 200-300, and she was free to do that.
If I put mine in the common room, they will have one of their own in their room, and I’m worried I won’t be able to use the TV when I have friends over/if there’s a show I want to watch because they’ll want to watch something else.
For the apartment, charge more for the people in the larger rooms.
So, if, for instance, the bedrooms were 100 and 150 sqft, and the common areas were 500 sqft, and rent is $1000, the person in the 150sqft room would pay $550 and the other person would pay $450.
Sounds like you already caved in on the TV, so it is harder to walk back. But a few things: if you bring yours, will the person bringing the 24" let you have it in your room? If not, then I would say no, you planned to bring it for your bedroom. I agree if yours goes in the living room, they pay for a stand or table. But if they buy a stand and TV for the living room, then you probably do need to chip in some if you want to use it.
Sounds to me like you have a bossy queen bee type in the larger room. My advice is to stand up to her right away.
Regarding rent, I am betting it is paid straight to the university so can’t be split among them.
She already said the rent was assessed by the university. Someone has to get the bigger room, and really the first one there gets it. I loved that my daughter’s room was assigned by the university. There were four rooms in the suite, all about the same size, but the on on the end just a little different configuration. University assigned the rooms A, B, C, and D so it didn’t matter who got there first. There were 4 cupboards in the kitchen, also assigned.
Your TV, you decide. Also agree that your roommate might not want to watch (or you watching) in bed. Also, how will you have friends over to watch in your bedroom?
If you are contributing items to common space, like a couch or pots and pans, I would add them to the list of items purchased and needs to be purchased.
I’d also keep my TV in my bedroom, as I like watching prior to going to bed and when I wake. I would feel obligated to share in expense of common room TV, unless I brought other items to common room, e.g. Couches. It always works best if each person buys an item, which is theirs at the end of the year.
