<p>Okay, so I got a few merit-based full rides to schools and a pretty good scholarship to Rice, which I turned down for an ivy that doesn't give merit aid (no ivies give out merit aid, right? Well, point is, I didn't get any if they do...). My family doesn't qualify for any financial aid at any school. Before May 1, my parents told me that I should just choose the school I like and not worry about the cost, but now all they've been doing lately is telling me to apply to outside scholarships. I got a few, but they're all low $100+ range, plus a $2500 NM thing, which is not enough to keep them from getting super stressed-- and I haven't even left for college yet! Now I feel bad, and I wish I could have just decided on a State U. </p>
<p>The stress has a very negative impact on my entire family and I am not sure if there is a better way to get outside scholarships other than applying to as many as possible... My family doesn't qualify for aid, and I know that this implies that we really aren't bad off at all, but it stresses my parents out a lot nonetheless and I want to see if there is anything I can do.</p>
<p>And is it possible to say yes to a school after you've already said no? Thanks for your help.</p>
<p>You need to sit down and talk to your parents. You can tell them that you are applying to all of the scholarships you can find if you are doing so, but that what you have in hand is all that can be counted upon for now. You should also be looking for a summer job. If you have completed FAFSA, you are eligible for a $5500 Stafford loan. </p>
<p>Tell your parents that this is what is available. If this is not doable, ask if you should try to change to Rice or other options if it is going to be too much for your family to pay for your choice. Ivies meet 100% of what they define as need, but since you do not fall in their definition of need, you are not going to get financial aid from them, and they do not have merit awards. Also the NMS award is just for one year, isn’t it? Though this should have been discussed and handled much earlier, this is the soonest you can now address the finances. If something has happened that makes it difficult or irresponsible or not possible to pay your college costs, make an attempt to get into something less expensive. Or ask for a gap year from the school and work this next year. </p>
<p>Getting out of the acceptance is not a problem. It’s coming up with an alternative that is. Rice and other colleges are likely to be closed at this point, though you can check. There is a list of schools that still have spaces and funds available if your choice cannot be responsibly accomodated.</p>
<p>Your parents just now realized that the full cost of a private college is a lot? They might have thought of this sooner. We are also a middle class family and I realized in February and March that we didn’t qualify for any need based assistance but we also couldn’t afford the full cost of a private school. I spent all of February with a headache trying to figure out how we would afford it. Fortunately my daughter was accepted to a great school with a merit based scholarship so that is where she is going.</p>
<p>Try to correct this mistake that your parents have made. Seriously, one of my daughter’s friends had to be pulled out of a private school halfway through her sophomore year because her parents just couldn’t afford it anymore. The stress your parents are experiencing is real and it will only get worse once they have to actually start paying the tuition. If they can’t manage it you won’t be able to stay.</p>
<p>Yeah… I don’t know why they didn’t realize it. I am their first child, so maybe that’s why? They didn’t even know what a FAFSA or CSS PROFILE was and didn’t want to help me fill it out until about a day before the deadline.
I already have a job that pays relatively well, but still… </p>
<p>Another problem (well, sort-of problem) is that my parents don’t even know that I know that they’re stressed. It’s just that I overheard them talking/arguing about it… So it’s not something I can directly address with them unless I want to get yelled at for a day or two, and now is really not a good time because I have a bunch of AP exams on my plate.</p>
<p>I don’t think having to pull out will be an issue; the stress is the largest issue at the moment. But thanks for your advice, I really appreciate it!</p>
<p>You can tell your parents that you’ve been thinking about your choice and realized that it was an awful lot of money and maybe that money could be put to other uses or you might need help later if you want to go on to grad school, med school etc. Tell them you think you could be just as happy at Rice which gave you aid and that you want to go back and see if that scholarship is still a possibility. See what they say at that point. You’ve then opened the door for the discussion without admitting that you overheard anything. You’ve also given them an out if they feel that they have overcommitted. </p>
<p>It may not be possible to get the money back from Rice but if you act immediately it just might be. DO NOT PUT THIS OFF!</p>
But thanks for your advice, I really appreciate it!</p>