Please bare with me: I just finished my first semester at UCR and I did terrible. I finished high school at 16 and being here in this school so young and possibly not ready has caused major regret and anxiety. I lost interest in my classes, focused on friends, and became depressed/homesick to my family that lives 400 miles away. This also led to doing horribly in ARC 35 which is a math course that cannot be retaken unless under certain circumstances. At this point I gave up on taking the final because I had to get at least a 95% on it to bring my grade to a 75% and I knew it was impossible for me. I was kicked out of CNAS and now I’m a philosophy major. My parents know that I did not do so well in it. They want me to retake it but I cannot bare to tell them I did not try to take the final and what the consequences were after not doing well. My GPA is now a 1.53 and I have been placed on a probation. This has never happened to me, I have never gone below a 3.0 in high school and my anxiety has been through the roof. My parent’s do not know that this probation has happened so lying has also caused stress. I want to know how I can improve my grades, my mentality, and get out of this probation. This may be a lot of information but any help or feedback would mean the world to me. Does it get better? What should I do?
Take a temporary leave of absents to focus on your anxiety and depression. Also tell your parents about your grade… It will help relieve some stress and anxiety
You have to tell the truth, and ask for help…from them, your parents, and from anyone on campus who will help. Go to University health services, and inquire about counseling or other options for support. Go also to any academic type adviser, or even professor who you think might listen and advise. Trust me, you’re not the first person to go through this. Your age may make things more difficult, but I had some very rough periods in school, and even in grad school, and I was plenty older. Just know that it’s actually totally ok to take a leave of absence, or quit and go home and do some community college OR hang in there and get some help to make it work. Not one of these options would take away from your inherent worth, nor would one or another be any big prediction of your future. You can struggle now, and be perfectly ok and successful in your life. But do come clean with your parents. That’s an unnecessary stress on you. People want to help you feel well, and do well, but most importantly be well.