<p>I would rather talk about “fit” than “passion.”</p>
<p>Not everyone has a passion, and those who don’t shouldn’t be made to feel that there’s something wrong with them.</p>
<p>And those who have a passion may not be a good “fit” for the career field that inspires them.</p>
<p>I went to a college that had a large number of pre-veterinary students. Many had extensive experience working with animals in various part-time or volunteer jobs, including jobs in a veterinary setting. But the majority didn’t do well enough in college to get into veterinary school. They had to choose between dead-end jobs as veterinary technicians or assistants or pursuing entirely different careers. </p>
<p>A different sort of example: Many of us know high school kids who are excellent instrumental musicians and who devote large amounts of time to musical pursuits. They may play with multiple bands or orchestras, qualify for all-county or all-state honors groups, and do well in festivals or competitions. They’re always taking lessons or practicing for some recital or audition. And they enjoy it. But many of them would never consider majoring in music or trying to pursue it as a career because they don’t want to be freelancers who are constantly worrying about where their next performing gig or teaching opportunity is coming from. They want to work in fields where they can have an actual job.</p>
<p>We criticize young people on these boards who “passionately” want to go to a particular college. We urge them to look for a good “fit” instead and to realize that many places could be good fits for them. Why don’t we look at careers the same way?</p>
<p>I think the inconvenient truth is this: you can make at least a decent living following your passion if you are really, really good at what your passion is. The more competitive the field is, the better you have to be. There are actors, musicians, artists, writers, inventors, etc., who make good livings doing what they love. But they are very, very good at those things. Those who aren’t so good at them have a lot more trouble–no matter how passionate they are.</p>
<p>I would also note that many people do have to make choices–if you really are serious about some of the arts (for example) it’s not sufficient to do it in your spare time, especially if you end up in a job that demands a lot of time and energy.</p>
<p>If no one followed their creative passions, we wouldn’t have Harry Potter or Broadway or art museums. I know several young people who moved to New York, Los Angeles, and Atlanta, hoping to break in to music or acting. Two of them have and are supporting themselves with their talent. Others are working low-wage jobs and performing on the side.</p>
<p>We’ve told our children to get a four-year degree, then follow their passions – at least for a few years, while they’re young and while they can, getting even a low-wage job if necessary. If that doesn’t work out, they can start over. The important thing is to be ready to live very frugally: cheap cell phone, no pay TV, shop at thrift stores and yard sales, etc. (which we already do anyway ).</p>
<p>Some people don’t have a passion that’s job-oriented (or any real passion at all). That’s okay. However, there are some of our children who are never going to be satisfied until they work through that passion and figure out whether they can make a living at it. I say let them go. As long as they’re self-supporting, encourage them to give it a try.</p>
<p>We have Harry Potter, Broadway and museums-- not just because they followed their passions, but because they succeeded- whether it’s based on skill or luck (or, family influence.) Or, only after some long period of struggle or after the artist died. It’s where you’re up against that line (struggling and not succeeding) that you have to let reality in. </p>
<p>Not sure how to put this, but there should be a passion for life, family, friends, making other contributions, too. Balance. Not just the “I want.” It’s not easy.</p>
<p>We get threads about kids living at home, not independent- would we support them indefinitely, because of a passion- or do we expect some turning point?</p>
<p>As I’ve told my S, it is common sense that you have to balance different things, including: (1) your “passion” or desire to engage in the activity; (2) your apparent ability or aptitude to do well in the activity, in comparison with others, given that the ability may develop over time; (3) the long-term outlook on the job or income opportunities one can expect from engaging in the activity; and (4) how well the activity fits into your other life goals (e.g., does it make it very difficult to have a family if you want to have a family).</p>
<p>Also, with regard to kids following their passions, it is difficult to follow something that is evolving and changing so rapidly.</p>
<p>lookingforward – The people who succeed all have to have tried first.</p>
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<p>I totally, wholeheartedly, agree.</p>
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<p>We have encouraged our children to follow their passions, BUT we have also told them that they must get degrees and that they may have to take low-wage jobs in order to follow that passion. Sitting on the couch at home is not an option.</p>
<p>My concern is that so many parents try to mold their children into what they think they should be in order to get a well-paying job. It’s a lot easier to follow your passion when your passion is computer programming or engineering. Not all students, however, want to be STEM majors. The world needs writers, artists, and musicians as well. It’s important to teach our children to be both idealistic and realistic – a difficult balance at times.</p>
<p>I hope she finds some fun at the sub shop, something that makes it not too awful.<br>
Marsian, I know they have to try and I admire it. It’s just that I keep telling my kids, trying and succeeding are two different things- maybe the two ends of the continuum. And, to find the joys in-between. I also think many people could benefit from delaying some passions- I mean, work your butt off the first 15-20 years, set yourself up, then leave the conventional work force early. But, that requires luck, too- and a stong ability to save, delay some gratifications, etc, to get to that point.
I’m still getting over Cal Newport turning down a job at Microsoft. The brainiacs I knew who worked there all retired early and are pursuing passions. And, they did enjoy the ride.</p>
<p>I always liked Studs Terkel’s book “Working.” You can put “passion” into many kinds of work. My daughter is learning to take pride in how she cuts a sandwich and how fast she can make change. This attention to detail, and respect for others, may even translate into her art, who knows.</p>
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