<p>jnm123–I call it the Michael Jordan factor. There was a definite shift in parenting as soon as Michael Jordan started making millions wearing tiny shorts and playing with balls. Parents moved from feeling that if their offspring went to college and were self-supporting they had done their job and done it pretty dang well. That shift turned to a parent feeling like their parenting skills were in question if their child wasn’t the “best” at everything. The KIDS know the difference and know who the best athletes, musicians, students are and for the most part it doesn’t bother the kids that they are not the “best” but not so for the parents. </p>
<p>How often did your parents talk to your teachers at school or hound you to get your homework done or make excuses for you if you didn’t? Now, that is pretty much the norm. We have online gradebooks, which are nice, but just a symptom of the over-involvement of parents (yes, us included).</p>
<p>Look at the parents here that are shunned by their neighbors if junior isn’t accepted at Harvard (ok, exaggeration but that is the feeling that comes across in many posts). Look at the posters here with 7th graders wanting to know what programs to get their kids in so they can get into Harvard–does the kid even know what Harvard is let alone want to go there? It’s bragging rights for most parents. Along with that though, comes the need to PAY for that education and to heck with retiring and enjoying your own life, you are mortgaged to the hilt but you get to wear a fancy sweatshirt :D. If we asked our parents to do that for us we would have been laughed at. Our parents either expected us to pay for it on our own or only paid as much as they could afford without loans.</p>
<p>circuitrider–there is NO need to take out parent loans for a child to go to college, ever. Parents do it all the time but there is no NEED. That is an assumption parents make. There are 100’s of other schools that are affordable where kids can attend and graduate with little to no debt of their own and NO debt for their parents. The problem is, these schools aren’t in the top 20 of any list and people assume they aren’t good schools. The school our DD is attending isn’t on any list. We’ve talked to ONE person that has even heard of her school in our area, yet ALL of the kids that applied to medical school over the past 3 years at this school got into medical school (dd’s chosen field). Please tell me why I should take out 1000’s in loans for her to go elsewhere that doesn’t have even close to that acceptance rate :D. What is left of her costs for school we can pay out of our discretionary income and not miss it because it just isn’t that much money–private school too.</p>