<p>Are most schools fairly honest about the role of fraternities on campus? Is there a way to find out for sure how important they are and if the school's social life revolves around them?</p>
<p>My concern is that my son is not the type to join a fraternity (he might change!!). I don't want to have him ostacized or left out if he doesn't choose to join...</p>
<p>You can ask what percentage are involved. As a general rule, the inflection (“tipping”) point tends to be around 30%.</p>
<p>Each school’s CC forum is a good place to start. Cornell has 40%+ in Greek life, but a school of its size has a lot of other alternatives outside of Greek life. Each school is different. At Cornell, Greek life plays a role only for the first 2 years, whereas when I was at Colgate(many moons ago) fraternaties played a very big role in our social life for all 4 years. Greek life up north is also very different than south.</p>
<p>I would try and find a discussion group populated by current students and ask them.</p>
<p>warriorboy, I think there are other important factors besides membership percentages. If the school is small, or geographically isolated, a relatively high membership will be a larger factor than if the school is mid-to-large sized, and located in a city or vibrant college town.</p>
<p>My son’s university (mid-sized, urban) has an active fraternity/sorority scene, and no one would deny that they are quite visible–not just in terms of sponsoring parties, but bringing music groups to campus and organizing charity fund-raisers, etc. The nominal membership is about 32% of males, 50% of females. My son is not a member and has no desire to be, but is nonetheless quite happy with the school, has many friends and no lack of social life. There are plenty of non-member students and non-Greek activities on campus, and a fairly big city to hang out in.</p>
<p>Another factor to consider is residence rules, i.e., do members live in the dorms with the other students–at my son’s school, only a few officers live in the houses, while all other members live on campus in university housing.</p>
<p>In my opinion, perhaps the most important consideration is the personality of the individual student. Independent, self-confident types are less likely to be bothered by not being part of a significant scene.</p>
<p>Finding out the percentage of participation is a good start and this number is available if you search online. But it’s not enough. My s goes to a big state school with a relatively small percentage participating in greek life…but they still have a big influence on campus and run many of the social events.
Narrow down your choices and then post questions on the individual discussion boards for each school. Find out if the greeks have houses, what rush is like, if parties are open or not, and if the greeks run the major social events. I agree that it makes sense for your son to go to place where you will be happy no matter what his choice is. The admissions folks will always tell you this is the case (even at a place like Washington and Lee where the participation rate for fraternities is approaching 85%). So yeah, you’ll need to get some opinions from students…<br>
Also, books like college prow***ler are helpful but I would only buy those after the choices are very much narrowed.</p>
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<p>That is how my SIL described my nephew. He went off to a u with a very small Greek scene, ending up pledging and was very active in his fraternity.</p>
<p>You asked if they lie. Supposedly there is supposed to be no hazing, but my kid had a very dangerous hazing. Of course, he forbade me to report it.</p>
<p>Same with another hazing, but that wasn’t dangerous, just gross. Again, mom sworn to secrecy.</p>
<p>They lived, fortunately, and they are the best experiences in every way imaginable.</p>
<p>My concern wasn’t if they were or weren’t the type. I thought they would be exclusionary, but they are not. Many non official members are regularly included in activites of all kinds - not just parties.</p>
<p>Percentage is important, but so are absolute numbers.</p>
<p>My daughter, like Oldfort’s daughter, is a rising junior at Cornell. Her daughter is involved in Greek life; mine isn’t. </p>
<p>The percentage of students involved in Greek life at Cornell is indeed quite high, but because Cornell’s campus is so large, there are also thousands of students who are not in fraternities or sororities. </p>
<p>In my daughter’s experience, Cornell students who choose not to participate in Greek life don’t feel left out. They have plenty to do and plenty of people to do things with. The concept of people ostracizing other people simply doesn’t apply on a campus of Cornell’s size and diversity. The same might not be true at a smaller campus with a similar percentage of fraternity and sorority members.</p>
<p>I should add, though, that even on campuses with far lower percentages of Greeks than Cornell, fraternities and sororities have an influence because they are organized. My son went to the University of Maryland, which has quite a low percentage of students participating in Greek life. Nevertheless, Greeks dominated the student government because they organized themselves to support specific candidates and proposals. No other group did this.</p>
<p>Just remind your son to keep an open mind. I was as anti-sorority as they come and went through sorority rush to keep my roommate company during the parties. </p>
<p>I ended up pledging and serving as an officer for 3 years (at least it gave me some leadership experience for my resume).</p>
<p>You could look on the college’s web site and see if they have links to Greek life; there might be information about how many students live in Greek housing, etc. Also look for online copies of the school newspaper - if Greeks are very active, they will probably end up in the stories and pictures.</p>
<p>No, in my opinion, I don’t feel that college admission’s/tour guides/information sessions are honest about the degree to which Greek life plays in the social atmosphere at the school.</p>
<p>I agree with the comments above and would also encourage you to look at other organizations on campus that might interest your son as well so that whether or not he pledges a frat, he will have other groups to become involved in as well. </p>
<p>You will find many active organizations within Honors Colleges, honorary organizations that are major specific, Student Government (many of these kids have been active in Student Govt in high school whether or not they go greek in college), dorm communities or residential colleges with a focus, or Student newspaper/radio/tv, Mass Comm staffs, or campus volunteer groups who do community service work in the area - all good ways of establishing friendships and getting involved on campus. My daughter is in a sorority and is also involved in other organizations on campus so that her friends come from a mix of those groups. She was telling me recently that one of her sorority sisters is the women’s basketball team student manager so the girl brought several of the ladies basketball team members to dinner at the sorority house so there isn’t always the exclusivity that some tend to believe.</p>
<p>The percentage does not capture it. And I agree with nysmile, the PR spin is not usually very accurate wrt to influence of Greeks on campus. If it is your thing, great, but if it is not, dig deep to find out what the realilty is. My son found that at his Ivy, while the percentage didn’t seem that high, Greek scene consumed a lot of social life 2nd semester freshman year and soph year for those involved. You can go to the parties anyway, and by junior year a lot of kids are partying off campus and are old enough to go to clubs, so it wasn’t as much of a factor.</p>
<p>My daughter attends a large state school with a huge Greek population, probably much larger than any of the schools mentioned above. She hates anything related to Greek life and was initially worried about how it would be socially for her there. She now says she loves sororities and fraternities because they take those kids out of the dorms and she never sees them. She has no contact at all with this large population and it’s not a problem. There are so many other students and activities, she claims she doesn’t even notice the Greeks on campus, though any campus visitor would be struck by their overwhelming presence.</p>
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<p>Well, yes, I’ve also heard other anti-Greek kids cite this advantage of having Greek houses on your campus.</p>
<p>Greek life varies greatly from school to school. I was in a sorority at William & Mary. We were a really eclectic group. We lived in the house, with very few exceptions, only senior year. I had lots of friends that were not Greek and many friends in lots of other sororities and never considered joining a sorority to be a better choice - just a choice. When some of my peers describe their experiences with sororities and fraternities, I hear a completely different story - not even recognizable in many cases.</p>
<p>I took a friend to rush one time, and he was militantly anti-Greek at the time. I liked the frat, hung out there a little bit, but didn’t pledge. By the end of rush week, he pledged and is now an active member. He talks about it so much it is obnoxious. Your son may end up at a frat, even if it’s not what it seems right now, to him or you.</p>
<p>The interesting thing is that his GC is very pro fraternities and thinks that it is a great bonding experience. She doesn’t think that it’s as crazy as it was back when I was at school.</p>
<p>My son is not a “joiner” and had no interest in joining a frat. We were quoted “17%” as the magic number joining frats at St. Louis University-perhaps they meant 17% of all males, females, grad students, faculty are in frats because he was the “odd man out” --everyone joined-and so he transferred.</p>