<p>The thing about Greek Life is it is a large obligation and a huge time commitment, during rush, pledging, new brother semesters and as an older brother. Look at it this way, depending on what path your son follows, the fraternity scene is a simalucrum of his future, regardless of what path he follows -- be it corporate, military, civillian government, or non-profit. </p>
<p>The rush period is like the recruiting/interview process of any organization where everything is beautiful and glossed over with smiles and promises. Pledging is training, the hard part, and like any lifepath, it essentially a weeding period. Of course, you signed the contract so to speak and if you reneg it looks negatively upon your integrity. As an individual who was an active greek during my time in college and now am an active and very supportive alumni, I cannot express my disappointment and what it says to me about someone who renegs, particularly early on in the pledge semester. That isn't to say that the person who leaves is a bad guy, it just says that maybe they have an issue with committments and that echos to me as a member of the professional world. But it is worth it to stick the process out and teaches the valuable lesson of how to work together and coordinate with large groups of people, not too mention how to stretch, exceed and shatter your limits. </p>
<p>Depending on the greek scene at your son's school, his pledge class can be anything from as few as 2-5 guys (not uncommon at Cal) to as large as 30 (seen at a lot of southern schools or schools where the greek scene is huge) or bigger. The issue here is, and what I find a lot of people don't know how to do -- yet I feel it is an ABSOLUTELY essential skill, is how to work, lead and follow with a group of people who are otherwise perfect strangers. One thing the Greek System and my fraternity taught me was how to be pliant and how to swallow my pride, yet be firm when I was uncomfortable and had second thoughts. Trust me, the brothers of the house will understand FAR more if you have individual reservations to things and are firm about them than being wishy-washy and perceived as weak. I would tell your son to stick it out with the fraternity he chose. The problem with going back to the other fraternity is people remember that he did not pick up his bid and went to another house. It is one thing to not get a bid and be invited to try again next semester or not accept a bid because one does not feel ready, and another thing entirely to get a bid and not take it to join another house.</p>
<p>The rewards of Fraternity Life far outweigh the difficulties of pledging. Of course, his first semester or two, he may be expected to take on more grunt activities (like helping with cleaning or low-ranked jobs in the house that involve physical labor or low-level management, handling food arrangements, house management, managing cleanup crews), will be difficult but build character and teach valuable life skills and even if he does not hold an executive office, when he gets a few semesters under his belt, usually after 3-4 after he becomes a full bro (as a junior or senior) depending how old he was when he joined -- caveat: depending on the house, school, etc. the process may be accelerated if your son is older--, he will be expected to become a leader and administrator in the house. </p>
<p>Trust me, have your son stick it out. He will not regret it, and he will make friends and allies that will help him out and watch out for him for the rest of his life. Sure, he may be close to only a few of them, but there will be a constant support network for him throughout his college years and for those few years after college which can be quite rocky.</p>