Freshman wants to take car to school next year

<p>My freshman wants to take his car to school next year. He will be moving to an off campus house. The bigger issue is that he wants to drive home (600 miles) instead of flying home for breaks. I am totally opposed to it - but my husband, who loves to drive, doesn't see a problem with it. I'm already dreading this conversation - because I feel so strongly against my son taking the car and my son feels so strongly about taking the car. Am I overeacting?</p>

<p>Maybe. What kind of driver is your son? Personally, I would much prefer my son in the driver's seat than just about anyone. If he lives off campus, a car might almost be a necessity, depending on the public transportation in the area.
I understand your concern about driving home on holidays, though. Maybe suggest a compromise-you could pay for the train/plane home on holidays, but let him have the car for everyday driving. 600 miles is a long drive, and students are often tired after exams before the holidays.</p>

<p>If your son is a good driver, I would let him take the car. I know that last year at my D's college (she took a car; we live about 2 hours from campus), the kids that didn't have a car felt REALLY isolated. It was a chore to get to the local Target to restock supplies. Many felt like they were imposing when they asked my D to drive them there. Sometime, in fact, they WERE!!</p>

<p>I think that the above-mentioned compromise about paying for a plane/train/bus ticket home for the holidays is a good one.</p>

<p>Are you concerned because YOU don't like to drive?</p>

<p>Any young male should be able to drive 600 miles straight without a problem. I used to do 1000- 1200 in one day pretty often solo. No problem as long as you can leave early morning.</p>

<p>Can your son share the ride with another student from the area, so they can share driving responsibilities? That is what we required of our son, who goes to college 450 miles from home.</p>

<p>It is definately a family decision and one that needs discussion. I would also consider AAA service in case of break-downs, etc. I have heard that it is good, just don't have any personal exp with it.</p>

<p>Consider the climates at school and at home in your decision.</p>

<p>If you live 600 miles directly south of your son's school, chances are that he has not had as much experience with winter driving as he would need to function well in the college community. This could be an issue, especially since winter weather can be an issue during several of the college breaks.</p>

<p>My son will be a sophomore next year, at a college about 500 miles away. He will be taking his car, and he will be driving it home on breaks. I'm pretty much a worrier myself, but he has been driving regularly since he was 16, does have some highway driving experience, and is a good driver (although I suspect a bit faster when I am not sitting next to him). While he may have passengers who live en route, I doubt very much he will allow anyone else to drive his car; it is a manual transmission, and he doesn't even like how his mom and dad drive it, and we have driven cars with stick shifts for decades.</p>

<p>My son has has limited long distance highway experience. He goes to school in Michigan, so there is a threat of bad weather when he drives home. However, he is extremely responsible and is a good driver. The problem is he wants his car here and at school. He is extremely stubborn, and I don't know if it is worth the battle to have him not take the car to school.</p>

<p>If D takes her car next year, (7 hrs away) I will not advocate her driving back home in it....in fact, I'd probably suggest that we tow it up for her. It's older, (hopefully less susceptible to theft), and I'd be worried about it breaking down on the highway, not to mention being uncomfortable about her driving all that distance. If she has it for a convenience factor at school, that's one thing; relying on it is something else.</p>

<p>It seems that you have reason to be concerned about the long distance driving for breaks, especially winter break. Is there a car he can use at home while he's there so he can leave his own car at school? Maybe some talk about the wear and tear on his car, as well as the cost of gasoline, will make the compromise more palitable. My son pays for his own gas, so a plane ticket home would be appealing...</p>

<p>We live in Florida and our daughter goes to school in Ohio. She flies home for shorter breaks but will drive for her 4 week winter break. She will visit friends along the way to break up the trip. She did not want to leave her car on campus for weeks during the winter. She had visions of it under 6 feet of snow. When she is home for short breaks we share the cars at home. So far it seems to be working.</p>

<p>That's a tough one. A question we are debating. It's been tough for our son without a car this year. Next year (his senior year), we are going to let him have a car, and in retrospect should have this year. But sophomore year, neither husband nor I were comfortable enough to seriously consider it. And I think we were right. A lot of this fuzzy reasoning. IT's hard to say at what point it would be a good decision. We are going to buy a new, inexpensive (relative) car and finance it over time so that the repairs will not be as much of an issue. He will have a job as he does this year so ther has been some growth and responsibility. He has also been stiffed and stood up by enough kids to understand that he can't just help out everyone and make commitments to others regarding rides lightly. I don't think he would have understood that last year or earlier. I see a difference. Also I think there were some alcohol abuse issues earlier that seem to have been tamed (yeah, now that he is of age). I have seen disaster with college kids and cars, and it has also been a big help for some. YOU and your husband have to come to some sort of agreement that it is the right time. IF parking or other tickets have been showing up from when he is driving at home, or he is not showing responsibility or grades are an issue, I don't recommend it, for certain. Nor if he has problems socially, like taking off anytime someone calls or has an offer of something fun. THat was the biggie for my son. That he did not have his own wheels was a deterrent of sorts for that. Now I see a huge difference, and I would not mind getting him a car next semester, as he has an apartment and could use one. If his grades are good, I will consider it then or definitely over the summer. I was adamently against it before this point.</p>

<p>My daughter is a senior in high school and her car drives me nuts sitting in the driveway. I hate trying to get around it to get in and out of the garage. I often wish she were going to school close by and taking her car there with her just to get it out of the way. Whenever I tell her, I don't know what we are going to do with your car next fall, she says the car probably won't last that long. It has a lot of miles on it...
I hear they store boats for the winter out at the county fairground. Maybe we can store her care there...</p>

<p>I have one of those with my oldest. I don't know if his hasn't died yet. He has not used it in a while as it is cheaper to take public transportation to work with parking costs, gas, etc, and he has finally started to take accountability for his money. Yet on the occasions that he has needed a car, it has been nearly indispensible. If you hear anything about that storage possibiilty, let me know.</p>

<p>Yes, there are storage possibilities, at least in northern Indiana. Last winter (Dec-Mar) we stored a Camaro at a campground that has storage facilities and stores boats and cars over the winter. It was very reasonably priced.</p>

<p>D took her car to school 11 hours away. She will drive home for Christmas break. If she were driving alone, we would pay for a motel somewhere along the route. However, a young man who lives an hour from our hometown will be hitching a ride this time. As long as she has someone to share the driving, she'll be fine. She has done a lot of highway driving, and she has driven 7 hours in a stretch with no problem. If she had less driving experience prior to going to school, I might hesitate.</p>

<p>Flying will probably be cheaper than paying for insurance, gas, and maintenance on a car. Safer than driving, too. Unless he really needs the car to get to class, etc., unless he/you can easily afford it, I think it is best to avoid having a car as long as possible. Does he have safe/free parking? Are other students going to be borrowing the car? Does he really want to spend two whole days of breaks driving back and forth? 600 miles is quite a distance--I'd be worried, too, about accidents, falling asleep at the wheel, etc.</p>

<p>Atomom, all of those reasons are why we would not hear about a car. The safety was the first thing on my mind. Did not trust him to be safe. Accidents,tickets, etc. One thing about them being off at college is that if he does not have a car, the drinking and other activities are less likely to include driving which is where it really gets dangerous. Also the weather is not good up where he is. Then comes other kids wanting rides or borrowing it. Also going places when he should be doing work. Depending on rides and public transportation does cut down on these things.</p>

<p>Then there is the expense. Not a small thing. No way is the driving going to any way compensate for the cost of flying, trains, bus or paying a share of gas. Since he is in a city,there is enough mass transit and cabs that he can get along pretty well. Also there are enough kids with cars for him to bum rides. </p>

<p>Now, however, he has an apartment. Could use a car to shop. Is more independent. Finding a need to go places where you need a car. Also time and schedule is erratic due to nature of his work. So it's getting harder to plan rides home. He did not get back till Thanksgiving day this time, and wasn't sure he would be back at all. When he finally was off, no plane, train , bus seats till the last minute. He has a job now and has accumulated some money. Has a scholarship and being at a state school has saved us quite a bit. He will stay at school this summer, working and auditioning. May join a company. A car would be useful, really necessary for him to keep on schedule. But not a thought of it would even go through the mind except that he is showing the responsibility that he might be able to handle it. That above all is the big issue.</p>

<p>Regarding the driving back and forth. My son is 4.5 hours away (in his car, a jeep wrangler) and a scooch under 4 hours in our car (more comfortable!). </p>

<p>Something I have hope he learned from Thanksgiving break is that one should start off on a long drive well rested ... and then won't have to stop for a nap midway. At least he <em>knows</em> he should stop for a nap and <em>did</em> stop for a nap.</p>