<p>Hi everyone - this is really for those MT-ers who were part of the "posse" for last year's audition class and whose kids are now settled in to their respective programs. Anyone else encountered the "crisis of confidence" at this point in the year when your MT student begins to doubt how their ability stacks up against others in their class? Of course I'm not rushing in to rescue; I've suggested a visit to the faculty mentor/advisor for some honest feedback and counseling...I just wondered if this is somewhat normal and if others have experienced it? This is not a question of whether or not he still wants to do MT...it's a question of feeling a bit overwhelmed by the obvious and incredible talent he encounters routinely....and that faculty are not prone to giving copious amounts of compliments because, let's face it, they expect excellence. Just musing and wondering if anyone else might be dealing with this at this point in time? Any new MT-ers who have words of wisdom, just jump right on in! Thanks everyone.</p>
<p>I am not a parent, but a teacher of Musical Theatre and Theatre students… as well as a former Musical Theatre student. This is very common. Almost all of the kids were “stars” in their HS programs. Also… most HS programs are not expecting the level of specificity and focused work that is expected in college training programs. When you are learning new skills it takes a while to really be able to integrate them organically into your process. Students also often have a tendency to overestimate the progress, and ease with which their peers appear to be making progress, and underestimate their own. </p>
<p>MANY, if not most, students struggle with this off and on throughout the freshman and sophomore year. Often by junior year they begin to feel more grounded in the new techniques and skills they are learning, and they have the younger kids to look at to remember how far they have come. </p>
<p>I teach in a small program with lots of one-on-one mentorship from faculty, so we are often having these conversations with students. We also encourage them to talk to upperclassmen for advice and guidance on how to make it through the freshman and sophomore “existential crises.” </p>
<p>The ‘competition’ can be incredible and seemingly daunting, however your son must have in hand the evaluations from his voice jury and feedback from acting professors. PPU is small enough that a student can easily find a mentor of sorts, someone to share concerns with. In my student’s class (sophomore), that is often one of their teachers, as opposed to the assigned adviser. It is hard, especially when kids who just last year were at the top of their game in high school, suddenly find themselves working behind the scenes. If he tried out for the May shows, I know the directors welcome the opportunity to give feedback about individual auditions. Also, he could, if he is comfortable, talk to the upperclassmen. Everyone has good and bad days. My student’s advice would be to hold tight to all of the good experiences, all the times it worked and you knew you were in the right place…those spectacular days when you hit all the right notes and knew, without anyone else saying it, that you rocked the stage…and then remember and luxuriate in YOUR memories when things seem to be going splendidly for someone else. I would more than happy to connect you or him with my student who could at least confirm that for every high there will be a low…remember physics! </p>
<p>Yes he has feedback from voice juries and acting; both very positive (excellent, actually). He did audition for the May shows, so I will suggest he get that feedback as well since I’m not sure he was aware he could ask for it. It’s just good to know this is normal. As a college professor in a liberal arts program, I expected it was a rather natural process, so this is great to hear. Thanks so much to both of you for your comments. </p>
<p>He is probably exhausted. Isn’t spring break two weeks away? Favorite home cooking and time to chill will work wonders. </p>
<p>Thanks, halflokum. I suspect that is part of it !! And yes, he will be home next weekend for a whole week of chill time and that will be good medicine indeed. :)</p>
<p>It is very normal. It is not only very normal for Freshmen, it is the nature of the business itself. They will <em>always</em> have times that they doubt themselves, sometimes fiercely. I think it’s better to learn how to cope in college than in the professional world, which can be brutal. So not to be a Pollyanna, but I think it’s good your S is learning to cope with doubt and disappointment early on during college, with the supports and feedback in place. Also, some self-doubt is for good reason. Going from a big fish in a small pond to a small fish in a big pond, many students see rightly that they still have a lot to learn. This is good. If you coast on your laurels, and are not surrounded by competition, you sometimes stagnate and do not force yourself to learn and improve. Then when you get out in the ‘real world,’ you are not competitive. And yes, some of it, I bet, is that he is in need of spring break and home cooking!</p>
<p>Around this time last year (freshman year) my daughter was recovering from mono that hit her hard in the month of January and early February. I lost count of the sobbing, miserable phone calls home as well as the middle of the night trips to the ER. But if they make it through these down moments and still want to be there, there is nothing more re-affirming of necessity of their chosen path than that. My daughter was in rough shape, but I would have had to drag her out of there with her nails gripping the walls to bring her home. Makes that big fat check I write every semester a little easier to tolerate. It’s hard to argue with passion.</p>
<p>I remember that @halflokum - My oldest (non MT) D was going through mono at pretty much the same time (she was a sophomore - just admitted to her Athletic Training program) We even got an “I’m quittting school call” (that’s how miserable she was) We took her completely seriously, said we’d call the school the next day to find out about her scholarship and deferring her acceptance into the program a semester, etc. - but by the next morning we got a text saying “I’m not quitting school.” She survived - and managed to keep her scholarship. </p>
<p>I will say that the counseling services offered at her school have really helped my kid - who is a perfectionist with some anxiety issues. Don’t hesitate to tell your kids to seek out those kind of services. I pushed my D - and she said she felt guilty because “I’m not suicidal mom - I’m just anxious” - but the anxiety was interfering with her life. The counselor helped her refocus - and she visits her about once a month to keep the anxiety in check. No medication - just checking in with a calm trained professional! It’s made a huge difference - and she and I are both glad I pushed her to go see a counselor.</p>
<p>connections–so true. Even Idina, see NYT this week:
<a href=“Idina Menzel’s Role in ‘If/Then’ Is Not Such a Stretch - The New York Times”>Idina Menzel’s Role in ‘If/Then’ Is Not Such a Stretch - The New York Times;
<p>I couldn’t say it any better than CTownMom. I’ll add something legendary Steelers coach Chuck Noll used to say: “It’s a marathon, not a sprint.”</p>
<p>This hit both my sons sophomore year. First year they were just so thrilled to be on their own more, leaning what they loved. Then reality hit sophomore year that this is HARD. Anyone who thinks this is a cupcake major is nuts.</p>
<p>I hope all the kids and parents who are pursuing musical theater degrees stop and think about the pressure of this major. Breaks before school are spent finding monologues and songs. The first days back to a term can be the crisis of confidence that comes with callbacks. Most freshman…especially the girls, have a tough time accepting casting. They feel under scrutiny in their classes, worrying that if they make a mistake they will never be cast in the subsequent years. Socially, even if they love their classmates, cliques are normal. I suggest having your kids try to have other activities on campus to go to, so they are not overwhelmed by the pressure. If they are going to be performers, they will have lots of time to do that. But, they can only be in college once is what I think. Make sure they are healthy and whole human beings, and not judging their self worth on musical theater alone. That will help them if they continue in this profession. </p>
<p>I think I’ve experienced the opposite. My D came in having had leads in plays but not musicals, partly due to the large high school she attended (over 4500 kids). So she came to her college MT program understanding how competitive things can be when there are a lot of talented kids around. If anything her confidence has improved I would say, as she has gotten so much more training in voice, acting and dancing. </p>
<p>She is constantly stressed as the schedule for an MT is insane as all other parents can attest. But she is handling it, learning that 5 hours sleep a night is OK, and she has made great friends not only in her MT program but in her dorm. Despite the insane schedule she is having a good college kid experience as well. Her experiences thus far have only convinced her (and her parents) more that she chose the right major and career path.</p>
<p>@jeffandann hats off for your D doing so well. It sound like she thrives under the pressure. Our D is the same personality type - I call 'em Worker Bees. </p>
<p>There are many times when her day will start on the ice at 6:00 AM (competitive figure skater) and end at 11:00 PM after rehearsals, lessons, homework, etc. Of course this schedule is made easier because Mom and I are there to make sure that everything is packed, snacks/meals are ready, alarm clocks go off, etc. The real test will come this Fall when it’s all on her. Hopefully she’ll stay healthy.</p>
<p>Would it help support-wise if she were to join a sorority? Or do the MT kids kind of form their own tight social club? Just from reading many posts on CC it sounds like very few kids in other programs will be as busy as the MT kids. Funny story - our D is able to take a Ballet II class this spring at the local liberal arts college. She figured that it would be a fun way to finish off her high school experience. Imagine her surprise when she was sore for the first time in a while, and had to study anatomy as it relates to ballet. A taste of things to come, perhaps?</p>
<p>Wait, Mike, your daughter does MT AND competively skates?!! She’s definitely a busy little bee and probably won’t know what to do with herself with the “slow” pace of an MT program!</p>
<p>Cheesehead, regarding the sorority issue: My D thought a lot about it, agonized might be a better word actually. In the end she decided against it, even though her mother had been a sorority girl in college and valued it highly. In the end, it came down to time management. If you’re in a sorority you have mandatory things you have to do that run smack dab into rehearsal schedules, etc, and my D could not see herself reconciling the two. </p>
<p>I hope she does not regret it. My wife made lifelong friends through hers. But the small group in her MT program almost gives it a sorority like feel, and she is going to reconsider again as a sophomore.</p>
<p>@cheeseheadmike our daughter was a competitive figure skater also. The discipline they have is great training for the MT college schedule! Our D is now a freshman MT at OCU and one of the things she loves is her sorority. It is a small school but many MTs participate in Greek life. I don’t think this is possible at all schools. I know she had a friend who was going to be in a fraternity at CCM but ended up not going thru initiation because of too many schedule conflicts. On the flip side, we met an MT at CMU who joined a sorority her sophomore year and loved it. But she did say that was atypical for MTs there. And we met a guy at Penn St. who was in a fraternity. and loved it. So how realistic it is to go Greek is dependent on the school and program. If you can do it, it’s a great way to meet new friends and some outside your major too.</p>
<p>@cheeseheadmike my D joined a sorority and like vvnstars D she is at a smaller school and they make it work. While she was pledging that is one thing she really checked into was the commitment. They do work with the theatre kids and if it is due to rehearsal or work they are able to be excused. She is a little hesitant about continuing in it becasue when she does something she gives her all and it bothers her that she has to miss some things but she has talked to the girls and they understand. So she is looking forward to moving into the house in the fall and getting to spend more time with the girls. </p>
<p>@jeffandann-encourage your D to look into it and seek out other theatre kids that are involved in Greek life. She might be suprised that she can manage both unless it will add to much extra pressure to her busy schedule.</p>
<p>@cheeseheadmike Mom of figure skaters here as well - although my MT kid “retired” from skating several years ago. Her sister skated competitively into college. This is the first year in 17 years that she’s not skating… trust me, she’s on the ice every break. She’s a Junior in college this year - her clinicals for her Athletic Training major finally just made it too difficult to continue skating with her team.</p>