<p>I don’t agree with the idea that a kid shouldn’t get a part-time job for personal/fun expenses because he “might” be taking a job from a kid who needs the money for tuition.</p>
<p>If that is the “right” and “just” attitude, then there are probably a lot of wives that shouldn’t work because their own husbands earn enough (or vice versa), and those wives might be taking jobs from other men or women who need the money to support their families. </p>
<p>Who’s making that claim? Who’s going to go around and telling high earner couples that one of them should quit so an unemployed person can have their job (and in this economy, there are many families that don’t have any wage earners. Those people REALLy need those family-earner jobs.) Certainly, having the ability to pay one’s rent or feed one’s kids is more important than going to school, but no one’s making that suggestion.</p>
<p>Besides, unless a kid is a “trust fund baby,” he’s going to have to learn the value of work, how to manage money, and make responsible choices involving “fun” expenses. There’s no better lesson than a part-time job.</p>
<p>Exactly Thumper! You said it so much better than I. How else can these young adults learn to control spending habits and maybe, just maybe save some $$ for later if it is mom and dad’s $$?</p>
<p>MommaJ - it really doesn’t need to be that complicated. It is an over kill to through receipts, because after all do you not have a general ideal how much things cost (shampoo, soap, drugs from CVS)? Even with metro card, what’s the % use is personal vs school related. And does it really matter? It’s not like you are paying for cab rides for her to go partying in the city. I don’t think it is productive to be nickel and diming one’s own kid. I would just figure out approximately what those extra costs would be, say $150 or $300/mon, and give her the same amount every month. Leave it to her to manage it. </p>
<p>My daughter studying abroad in Sydney. I just give a set amount a month plus paying for half of all trips. I don’t care if she is buying the most expensive shampoo or spending it all on cabs or drinks. I am not going to ask her to show me every receipt because I would trust what she tells me even if I need to question the spend.</p>
<p>While s had a summer job and made some good change, and we really did allow him to spend that as he wanted, I still tried to monitor HOW he spent his money at least while he was in HS. Heard too many horror stories of what kids spent their money on that I felt it was worth keeping an eye on it. If he spent $50 and was out with his girlfriend, that makes sense. It wouldn’t make much sense if he spent $50 but did “nothing.”</p>
<p>I think the key here is to set an amount and stick with it. For some, there is an allowance given for expenses. For others, the kids earn the money. </p>
<p>I guess MY bottom line is that I want my kids to live within whatever means they have (whether provided by me or earned by them). Luckily my kids have never asked for extra money. That is a good thing! As Oldfort said…she gives an amount…it’s up to the kiddo to budget it wisely…and (I would guess) not ask for more unless it’s REALLY needed.</p>
<p>Our DS2, now a freshman, is still figuring out what’s what. We paid for the big stuff: tuition/R&B, meal plan, books, and clothes before he left, but he figured he’d be responsible for all the incidentals. We didn’t really talk about it. But, then I discovered on Family Weekend, that he’s reluctant to spend a nickel on anything including laundry. We needed to ease up. I mean, I didn’t want him to miss out on going off for a pizza occasionally or a show if all his buddies were going.</p>
<p>He also wanted to get a job, but I think it’s a bit early for that. Let him get settled first. So, thanks to this thread, and learning that he’s a bit too restrained, I’m thinking I should slip him a $20 every now and then. And i promised I’d pay for any laundry! No excuses. :)</p>
<p>What has he been doing about laundry??? LOL</p>
<p>Does his school have the kind of laundry where they don’t have to use quarters (just slide their school card and the laundry charge is deducted from an account)?</p>
<p>Well…that depends…LOL Some of us are clueless and first make naive decisions (giving too much or expecting miracles with tiny amounts). LOL So, after a month of so, sometimes we have to make more realistic adjustments.</p>
<p>I have a question for you all-- D1, a sophomore, is in charge of her own incidentals-- she got moved into an apartment at the last minute and out of the meal plan, so we give her a set amount for some dining-hall food and some for cooking. Otherwise she works as a semi-pro babysitter (future teacher) and makes pretty good money to cover her needs.</p>
<p>The issue is a credit card: She is a wonderful girl, hard worker, excellent student, but has a weakness for spending on certain things. She’s happy with a debit card and checking account, and we can transfer money in an emergency. But I keep hearing that we have to get her a real credit card ASAP because it takes three years to establish her own credit. And as she gets older and out in the world more, there’s peace of mind in having a card for emergencies. BUT she’s worried (and rightfully so) that she might get into trouble.</p>
<p>Do we really need to get a sophomore a credit card?</p>
<p>I’d say pretty much any adult needs a credit card. You never know when your car is going to die in the middle of nowhere and have to spend $500 to get it fixed and another couple hundred for a motel etc etc. It also helps prevent fraud. I don’t know if you’ve ever tried to get charges removed from a checking accounting before but it is HARD and it’s only ever possible if it was unauthorized. If you’re trying to get your money back because of shoddy work or whatever, you’re really out of luck.</p>
<p>As far as establishing credit, that too is a good way to help children out. I’m kind of a unique example because I’ve handled my family’s finances since I was 16 but using my parents’ cards to establish credit will be very useful. Thanks to them, I’ll have a Fico score >750 by the time I’m done with college. That’s a great gift. It wasn’t a necessity like the protection credit cards give but it was certainly nice.</p>
<p>Over the summer, we decided on $200 a month for spending money, with the understanding that if that was wholly inadequate we could talk about bumping it up. D hasn’t asked for a raise, so apparently it’s working. I deposit $100 directly into her account twice a month. She has a workstudy job, but that goes 100% to her student account so that we all feel that she’s contributing something financially toward her education.</p>
<p>I’m thinking that next summer she’ll get the first credit card, perhaps a secured card.</p>
<p>YOU don’t need to get your kid a credit card…but your kid can get one. I know things have tightened up a bit…but my kids both had Campus Edge banking accounts with Bank of America (as an example…I am NOT trying to sell B of A…I’m sure other banks have this as well) that included free online banking, checking, savings and a Visa with a $500 limit. The cards were in my KIDS’ names…not mine. As I said earlier…I don’t know what they used them for as they were responsible for paying the bills and earning the money to do so.</p>
<p>S is a freshman; his dad and I paid for his books for first semester. I made an initial deposit of $200 to the new bank account in his college town. Kid had some cash already, $125 or so, and is expected to get a job on campus for any other spending. I haven’t given him any other money except a $10 bill in a card and a Subway gift card, though did take him shopping this weekend when I was there for Family Weekend. He laid in supplies which he hopes will be for the duration!</p>
<p>Kid has two debit cards, one to an account at my credit union and one for his college town bank account. Just this weekend, I gave him a credit card on my account; we had a talk about what the card is for (“Emergencies, defined as you ending up in Vermont because you and [another local kid who attends the same school] slept through your stop, or missing the bus in NYC. Also, for your books next semester, and transportation home/back to school. Not for food, entertainment, toiletries, normal expenses.”). </p>
<p>He is very frugal. I will let him use the credit card for (some) skiing expenses, but that is because he would likely not go if he had to pay them himself, and I would like him to take this opportunity to learn how.</p>
<p>Because he is young – just turned 16 – I’m cutting him more slack than I would if he were older, and the slack I’m cutting him now will gradually tighten up.</p>
<p>IF you want to give your kid a credit card, you can get one that has a rather low balance limit. Then, if an emergency happens (such as a need to buy a plane ticket), you can easily call and raise the limit.</p>
<p>But…a kid doesn’t need one “to establish credit.” Instead, have him get a checking account with a debit card - preferably at a credit union.</p>
<p>D1 isn’t getting a credit card until she has a real job. She gets so many mailings at home about credit cards. She opened one with Victoria Secret for their 10% discount. I promptly told her to cancel it. If you have income you could get credit. You don’t need to establish credit before you are a self supporting adult.</p>
<p>I wonder why you don’t think they need one to establish credit, mom2collegekids? This is a skirmish that keeps occurring in my house because my parents are extremely anti-credit cards–my dad doesn’t even allow my mom to use a kohls charge, I would be in trouble if any kind of a bill showed up. I am wondering how on earth I am to manage getting an apartment and handling the inevitable gradPLUS loans after graduation if I graduate without credit. My parents VERY reluctantly cosigned my student loans, they would not cosign anything else. I am happy with my debit card and am completely open-minded about it, but I am just wondering how to avoid finding myself homeless and unable to pay for law school when I graduate if I don’t have any credit-- or an alternative way to get credit. I had intended to just get the kohls charge and pay the balance right away at customer service so I never get a bill, but I don’t spend money on really anything but necessities.</p>
<p>Would you think it’s still a bad idea for me to have a credit card, my parents protests aside? I just don’t see the problem as long as I am paying the balance off every month and only using it for things I have money on hand for anyway, but my parents act as if there is some issue here that is beyond my level of comprehension. Your comment about kids not needing to establish credit made me wonder if there is just more to this than I see.</p>
<p>While I am anti-credit in general, I have seen the advantage of having my freshman daughter start to establish a credit history. I have lived outside the U.S. all of my adult life, and although I have assets there and debit cards, I´ve been denied a credit card for “lack of credit history”. This is not a problem for me, but I think if my Ds end up in the States, at some point they might need a credit history. So my freshman D in NYC pays most everything with a debit card…I have given her a fixed amount for the semester which she must use to cover all her expenses (necessities and pleasure). But she also got a secured credit card in her name to start off with and pays her phone bill with it each month just to establish credit.</p>
<p>As far as budgeting, I figured out what I thought would be reasonable for the semester (she has had no summer earnings so far) to cover her extra food (limited meal plan) books, and extra expenses and left it up to her to get through the semester. She finally has found a part-time job to supplement her spending money. I want her to be able to make the choices as to how she spends her cash. I really think she is showing a greater sense of responsibility and maturity because she has control.</p>