<p>Hello everyone! I am the mom of a brilliant, kind senior gay son. I would be interested in any information on gay life in college. I know he will be successful academically, I want him to be comfortable and happy socially.
Help!!</p>
<p>There are hundreds and hundreds of colleges where he will feel comfortable. What are his other interests?</p>
<p>Any small liberal arts college in the northeast would be perfect.</p>
<p>Some resources:</p>
<p>[Campus</a> Pride: Find Your Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender Friendly College or University](<a href=“http://www.campusprideindex.org/]Campus”>http://www.campusprideindex.org/)
[College</a> Rankings](<a href=“http://www.princetonreview.com/college-rankings.aspx]College”>Best Colleges 2023 | College Ranking List | The Princeton Review)</p>
<p>Most schools will now have some sort of LGBTQ organization. When visiting a campus, look for activity around that organization. Is it just a closed and locked office with meetings once a week? Are there multiple groups, with activities posted? Many of the smaller liberal arts colleges (especially outside the south) are very inclusive and tolerant, but if they don’t have a large gay population, how will your son’s dating prospects be? Things to think about.</p>
<p>Hi cmmmom13!</p>
<p>I was in your shoes four years ago. I think your best bet is to have your son narrow down the list of colleges based on the traditional items (city vs rural, etc.) and then check into the GLBT resources at those colleges. </p>
<p>One criteria we did have was the college had to be in a state where gay marriage was legal or likely to be legal soon. Which narrowed down the list four/five years ago but now, happily, that list is much longer! But that was just us. It’s hardly a fool-proof method. I just felt like it made for a safer enviroment in general. </p>
<p>In our son’s case, he wound up going to college in Boston and, interestingly, hasn’t really made use of much of the GBLT resources on his campus (Northeastern University) but has made connections in the larger gay community of Boston.</p>
<p>Best of luck to you and your son!</p>
<p>Know someone who has a gay child attending Northeastern also.</p>
<p>You will be hard pressed to find very many colleges in the south who are considered to be gay friendly.</p>
<p>cmmmom, I understand your concerns but if your son is a senior, hasn’t he already submitted his college applications?</p>
<p>I missed that, alwaysamom.</p>
<p>cmmmom13, What can we help you with? Do you have questions about specific colleges?</p>
<p>Thank-you for your help…
Pugmadkate…He came out to us about a year ago, although I had a feeling. My husband and I couldn’t love him more than we do, he is amazing.
I have so many ?'s I’m not sure how the dorm thing will work out, I’m concerned about his safety and the list goes on and on…
Northeastern is one of the colleges my son has been accepted to, his acceptance came with 20K,did you find the college affordable? U of Miami is his 1st choice right now. We have not been to Boston,we plan on visiting on spring break before he makes his final decision. He hasnt heard from BU UPenn or Drexel. USC (Carolina)has offered him a full ride to their honors college but we are hesitant of the southern schools.
Anyone have info on the above schools?</p>
<p>
</p>
<p>This is simply not true. Colleges, and college towns, in the South are often just as gay friendly as they are in any other part of the country. In North Carolina, UNC, Duke, UNC-G, Guilford, UNC-Asheville, and Warren Wilson are well-known as very gay friendly. Chapel Hill has an openly gay mayor, and Carrboro, right next door, elected a gay mayor in 1995. In addition, I’ve known gay students at Appalachian, NC State, UNC-Charlotte, and UNC-Wilmington who felt very comfortable and supported at those universities. There are support groups for gay students in just about every state university, as well as in some of the religiously-affiliated schools. </p>
<p>On a list of churches that openly affirm (including perform union services for) gay people, there are 36 within an hour of my house (in a non-urban area). Those are only the listed ones; I know of at least four gay-friendly churches that are not on that list. </p>
<p>Just like you would ANYWHERE in the country, you have to look at the county/town rather than the whole (Northeast, Midwest, West, South, etc.) region. While there are areas of NC where gay people would definitely not feel comfortable showing affection, there are very accepting areas as well. I know a number of gay couples who live very openly near me, and none of them are clamoring to leave the South.</p>
<p>There is absolutely no reason to exclude Southern schools from consideration. I can’t speak for USC or Miami, but your son could contact their campus groups for gay students and ask questions, maybe arrange a tour from their perspective. Good luck!</p>
<p>Our son attends Northeastern on a full-tuition scholarship, otherwise it would not have been financially possible for him to attend.</p>
<p>If your son is otherwise interested in USC, I would check it out further. Here is a possible starting place, [Who</a> are we | OMSA](<a href=“Office of Multicultural Student Affairs - Office of Multicultural Student Affairs | University of South Carolina”>Office of Multicultural Student Affairs - Office of Multicultural Student Affairs | University of South Carolina) You (or He) just needs to be very frank and ask the standard questions.<br>
*“What resources are available for GLBT students?”<br>
*“Are your police/security specially trained to deal with GLBT issues?”<br>
*“May I speak with some current students/faculty who are out?” </p>
<p>Here’s a short thread on this website that makes a good case for the diversity of University of Miami. <a href=“http://talk.collegeconfidential.com/university-miami-florida/1102919-university-miami-gay-scene-question-current-students.html[/url]”>http://talk.collegeconfidential.com/university-miami-florida/1102919-university-miami-gay-scene-question-current-students.html</a></p>
<p>My gay son was considering U of Miami for a while (for music). Miami/Ft. Lauderdale has a huge gay population - lots of clubs and events, etc. The campus has the usual LBGT groups. Quite frankly, Miami is kind of “ground zero” for young gay men.</p>
<p>The roommate issue can be tricky. The summer before starting Northeastern my son wrote to his future roommate and told him, among other things, that he was gay. It turned out that the young man had an issue with that and did not wish to room with a gay man. Northeastern was wonderful. The immediately contacted the young man and basically told him that if he was not ready to deal with people different from himself, he was not ready for life at Northeastern.But by this point, we were not comfortable with our son rooming with this young man. </p>
<p>Northeastern really tried to talk both of them into rooming together, asking them to try it for at least the first few weeks of the semester, but I put my foot down. So, we put in a request for a room transfer which was honored prior to the semester starting(that is unusual but I am unusually stubborn.)</p>
<p>Did I handle it correctly? I really don’t know. Coming from south Texas culture, my protective instinct was on “high alert” and I was just not ready to leave my son in Boston with a roommate who was “uncomfortable” with gay people. Maybe the university was right and the two of them would have worked it out and learned something along the way. But what’s done is done. </p>
<p>In the end, my son wrote to his new roommate and the roommate answered, “I’m straight but I really don’t care if you’re gay.” And that was that. They got along just fine.</p>
<p>OP - I hope you visit USC before you discount it for being in the south. The honors college is a fantastic program (D2 there now). We are from area and my girls had many gay friends in HS. There seems to be very active LBGTQ group. From a room mate perspective the honors dorm where all honors freshmen live actually has a number of single rooms (suite with another single) if rooming is a concern. Upper class honors housing is apartment style with individual rooms.</p>
<p>USC is a very large school and there are all types of people here. PM me if you want more info about the honors program.</p>
<p>cmmmom- Son is a pretty recent UMiami grad. I believe Miami is very gray friendly. I think any liberal leaning school would be. His GF is still there and he still has lots of friends/frat bros. attending. If it would help you, PM me and I’ll ask him his feelings on this.</p>
<p>I am a current UMiami student. Though I’m not gay, I have several gay friends who are all very happy with the LGBTQ community down here. Lots of campus resources, lots of support groups, and there’s a gay fraternity as well. Additionally, the city of Miami is quite gay-friendly as a whole. Should your son choose to go here he’ll have absolutely no trouble fitting in.</p>
<p>
</p>
<p>Completely agree with Marsian on this. I really hate when people make sweeping generalizations with absolutely nothing to back them up. aquamarinesea, what do you know firsthand about colleges in the south with regard to tolerance of homosexuality? Nothing, I would guess. Are there homophobic people and institutions in the south? Of course. But you can find them in every other part of the country as well.</p>
<p>I can tell you that when my D and I (D is gay) visited a school south of the Mason-Dixon line two years ago, there was an article in the school paper about someone breaking into a gay student’s room and spraying gay slurs on the walls. There were letters in the student paper SUPPORTING the break-in, and also some opposing. D dropped that college from her list. Could it happen at a northern school? Possibly. But she has not seen anything like that in the student papers of any other school she was looking at (and all are northern schools). Just one story, of course. But some southern schools deserve the reputation they have in this area. And given the political atmosphere in some red states toward gays, my D has chosen to steer clear of them for college.</p>
<p>
I don’t have anything to add to this thread at all, but I just wanted to say how awesome this statement is.</p>
<p>You know what drives me crazy? When people pretend that, for example, Massachusetts and Mississippi are the same concerning safety and quality of life for people who are gay and it’s only my parinoia and anti-southern bias that makes me think otherwise. That you can find bigots in Mississippi and Massachusetts doesn’t make them the same. And to take a parent to task for acknowledging those differences when considering a college for their child is absurd.</p>