<p>D is interested in applying to Wellesley, Mount Holyoke, Bryn Mawr and Smith, in addition to a few coed schools. D is straight and would "gently" like to ask what percentage of each school's population is estimated to be gay. She is very comfortable going to a school with a high tolerance and welcoming atmosphere for gay students but it's one of the questions that gets skirted around when taking campus tours. Thought there might be parents and/or current students willing to provide a realistic (honest) answer.</p>
<p>I graduated from Smith last year, and currently live with a Smith alum and a Mt Holyoke alum (both of whom also spent several years as Bryn Mawr students). </p>
<p>All of us were friends with people of all different sexual orientations during our time at women's colleges (and today, as grad students in co-ed programs!). </p>
<p>Straight students at women's colleges are DEFINITELY not in the minority--a student-produced survey at Smith last year said that less than a third of Smithies identified as lesbian or bisexual, and I don't think most of them feel excluded. My guess is that the percentages at other women's colleges are similar, or have even smaller gay populations. </p>
<p>My straight friends definitely had to work harder to find people to date than my gay friends did--no matter what the colleges tell you, men are not exactly flocking to campus, and it will take an effort to meet them. Not that it isn't doable, though--the boyfriends (and now fiances, and husbands) of my Smith friends are uniformly wonderful. </p>
<p>Overall, attending Smith was one of the best decisions I ever made--it's changed my life in so many wonderful ways and I can't say enough good things about it (though it's definitely not perfect!) If your daughter has more questions, please feel free to PM me.</p>
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<p>Straight students at women's colleges are DEFINITELY not in the minority-- less than a third of Smithies identified as lesbian or bisexual</p>
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<p>This is true at Bryn Mawr as well. I would bet that the population is a little straighter at Mt. Holyoke and Wellesley than at BMC & Smith.</p>
<p>At Bryn Mawr, at least, you'd get very different numbers if you asked people to characterize their orientation during freshman year, senior year, and five years out. A number of my 1999 classmates who were dating one another as juniors are now married to men.</p>
<p>A survey at Smith conducted last year found that slightly under 11% of all students consider themselves to be lesbian. This is roughly four times the national average (for the population as a whole), but well lower than the number of gay men at Yale. The percentage of students who consider themselves bisexual (22%) is slightly less than the percentage that the Centers for Disease Control found for women in the general population. (24%) (Men, by the way, are much, much less likely to consider themselves bisexual, even while the percentage of gay men is higher.) I imagine, however, that more women likely act upon this orientation while in college than within the population as a whole.</p>
<p>My D is a recent '06 Smith grad and was a tour guide while there.</p>
<p>I fully agree with Stacy's response. </p>
<p>There is no denying that there are issues about attending a single-sex school today. It was a different situation when there were more male-only schools (I am not saying better, just different). When Amherst was all-male, the guys would flock to Smith to meet potential dates. </p>
<p>If your D attends a single-sex school, she will have to be more proactive if she wants to develop a hetero dating life while in college. She should also expect to be in a very "out there" environment with respect to how people feel about a variety of sexual identities. </p>
<p>As with many life decisions, there are tradeoffs. Women who are not distracted by male dating prospects can, perhaps, better focus on developing themselves as individuals. </p>
<p>My D, who just happens to be straight, has no regrets about having attended Smith. She found the opportunities and level of faculty support tremendous. She made wonderful friends of all backgrounds and orientations. </p>
<p>My D would never have considered a single-sex school had she not spent a summer at a Smith program for high school students. Once she had been exposed to all that Smith had to offer, she could not find another college about which she could be so enthused. </p>
<p>Good for you for supporting your D's interest in single-sex schools. They have a lot to offer.</p>
<p>We visited the more well-known women's colleges, including Sarah Lawrence (which now accepts men) and Sweet Briar in Virginia. Our DD's impression was that the colleges were certainly more open about different sexual preferences, but would feel comfortable as a straight woman at any of them. Sarah Lawrence and Smith had more of a gay "presence" than the other schools, but she didn't cross them off her short list for that reason.</p>
<p>She ended up at her dream school, Wellesley, and feels very much part of the campus life. She tells us the boys at MIT and Harvard go out of their way to let the W. women know about their activities and parties. Her attitude is that is nice to have a clean, mellow dorm to come back to after partying. (She was clued into this by her tour guide at Bryn Mawr!)</p>
<p>P-o-o, I'm the dad of a current Smithie, straight, and one of the questions she had when investigating Smith was whether nor not she'd be made to feel uncomfortable because she was straight. Did two overnights a year apart and then has spent two full years there: never a problem, of any sort, along these lines. </p>
<p>People are pretty good at sorting out who hits from which side of the plate and while there are probably some "Oh, darn!" moments, I suspect that women at a school like Smith probably receive less unwelcome attention that they would at a co-ed school dominated by alcohol-fueled socializing.</p>
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...whether nor not she'd be made to feel uncomfortable because she was straight.
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<p>Nobody can "make" you feel uncomfortable. You control your reactions to every situation. Straight students at these schools adjust fine, I'm sure. The OP was just asking about the numbers. I doubt she anticipated "problems" along the lines of sexual harassment from persistent lesbians. </p>
<p>But it IS more of a challenge to meet men at these schools. Definitely a consideration for most yong women.</p>
<p>By that way of thinking, nobody would be unhappy if they were on a chain gang unless they decided to be. Most people would disagree.</p>
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<p>Nobody can "make" you feel uncomfortable. You control your reactions to every situation.</p>
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<p>I don't agree. It wasn't the percentage of lesbians that made me uncomfortable at Bryn Mawr, but a small, all-female environment is definitely not for everyone. The culture at schools like Bryn Mawr and Smith is a huge part of the experience, and you can't make yourself like it, just as many of my BMC classmates could never have forced themselves to like the sports-fraternities-and-beer culture at some other schools. I agree that you can control your reaction to the extent that you control whether to hide in your dorm room all semester instead of trying to make friends. But if your reaction to your classmates is, "Wow, I have nothing in common with these people," that's beyond your control, and you're wise to try to figure that out before you enroll.</p>
<p>I graduated from Mount Holyoke and have done alumnae interviewing for them. Also visited recently with my D. Also visited Bryn Mawr twice.</p>
<p>Women's colleges have a more visible and active gay population than at many coed schools. So tolerance for a range of sexual preferences would be essential. However, as everywhere else, straight women are by far the majority. Women who prefer to separate their social and academic lives are often happier at women's colleges. If meeting men is high on your priority list, you may be happier at a coed school. But many women at these schools have boyfriends and most graduates eventually marry men. There are many advantages such as close female friendships, a sisterly community atmosphere and supportive feminist environment encouraging female leadership roles.</p>
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By that way of thinking, nobody would be unhappy if they were on a chain gang unless they decided to be.
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<p>What a ridiculous comment. The thread is about adjusting to a campus with a high concentration of lesbian students. Unless the said lesbians are aggressive or interfering with a straight student's daily activities, there will be no disruption in "comfort" unless the straight student chooses to react that way. What kind of "problem" was your d expecting?</p>
<p>Yes, chain gang members are likely very uncomfortable. As are torture victims and babies with gas bubbles. Not much relevance to the topic, though.</p>
<p>Sticker: I do not think you read Tdad's comment in context. You and he are on the same page.</p>
<p>Do parents of young straight men worry about sending their sons to Yale with its very large gay male population and the most prestigious gay/lesbian studies program in the country? Do you worry about your son having to "room with one"?</p>
<p>Frankly, if I had boys, I'd be more worried about them being forced to room with an incipient (or current) alcoholic. We visited colleges - we have stories! and they ain't about Saturday nights.</p>
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<p>Mini, your repeated statements regarding the numbers of gay guys at Yale vs. lesbians at Smith are not really fair, and I suspect you know it. You refer to the number of Yale’s homosexual male students, without noting that the number of students at Yale (per website, “Approximately 11,250 students attend Yale.”) is several times that of Smith’s student body population. And Smith is the largest women-only college.</p>
<p>Further, no matter what the sexual preference of a number of Yale’s undergrads, there is no denying that Yale does still have a significantly greater number of straight guys on campus than does Smith ;), giving straight female undergrads at Yale many more opportunities to date guys.</p>
<p>Hey, my D went to Smith and we were fine with it. But when you try to force a misleading argument I think, if anything, that it undermines the point that this is nothing anybody needs to be that defensive about, or in denial of. Just my reaction to your oft-repeated comparison.</p>
<p>I do share your opinion that the drinking culture at a college is of far more concern than the sexual orientations of the students.</p>
<p>If there was ever a thread better left alone, it must be this one. Saying anything that does NOT minimize the PERCEPTION of the issue will be considered as an expression of bigotry. However, Mini's posts are misleading in the classification of the alternative lifestyle at Yale and at Smith.</p>
<p>If he or she wants to use an uncontrolled poll at Smith, then he or she should use a simialr one for Yale, especialy a recent one that offers different results than the antiquated "One out of four, or more" which is about twenty years old. </p>
<p><a href="https://www.yaledailynews.com/Article.aspx?ArticleID=31732%5B/url%5D">https://www.yaledailynews.com/Article.aspx?ArticleID=31732</a> </p>
<p>If we were to go back in journalistic prehistoric times, then we should also point to the National Enquirer's stories about Northampton being Lesbianville USA. </p>
<p>It is very easy to minimize or exxagerate the impact of lesbian live at Smith, depending of one's objective. In the end, there might be one truism: Smith is a school for strong women. At times, they'll have to be strong to ignore the pejorative comments about Smith being a school for lesbians. If such comments are perceived as objective or deliberately hurtful will be mostly in the eye of the beholder.</p>
<p>I guess I should leave it alone, but I think it's a matter of transparency (a much discussed topic on CC.) A dear friend's lesbian daughter found the heavy concentration of lesbians at Sarah Lawrence a plus. So it's not a place for great odds if you are a straight woman seeking your MRS. degree. But great odds if you are a lesbian. Definitely one of many factors to consider when choosing a school. I was only drawn into the thread because I thought the OP's d was smart to ask & not everyone seemed to think her curiosity was valid.</p>
<p>I'm almost afraid to post as well. I think the OP had a very legitimate question. One need not be homophobic to be interested in finding out the percentage of the gay population on a campus. At Smith, if about one third of the women are either lesbian or bisexual, that is a higher proportion than in the general population or on some other campuses. Just like a student may wish to find out the percentage of students who go Greek, or who are URM, etc., might affect their choice as to which environment feels like a good fit. It doesn't mean they don't wish to associate with gay students and many are very tolerant and not only do not mind, but befriend gay students. But kids do like to check out the climate of a college and a sense of how they may fit in. </p>
<p>My D seriously considered attending Smith, though originally only wanted a coed school. She liked many facets of Smith enough to sway her to attend but after the second overnight visit in April to decide where to go, she decided since she couldn't go to every great school that she got into, when push comes to shove, she preferred a coed campus. As I sat on my own on that gorgeous day on campus while my D had some appointmentns, I had some feelings that many of the girls appeared (outwardly, which is not fair I realize) to not be her "type". Now, don't get me wrong as I don't think she needs to go to a college where all the kids are her type and she actually really wanted a college with diversity. This was simply MY observation, not hers. I remarked about it to her and she said, "mom, YOU did not meet all the girls that I did. I just came from getting together with the girls on the tennis team and they aren't like the girls you describe and actually were my type." and she was right. There are all types of girls at Smith and a majority are straight. But it would be denial to not be open that there is a significant gay/bi population as well. </p>
<p>I don't at all think the issue is what TheDad mentioned that some may fear being "hit upon". That idea never entered my kid's mind. I don't think that would happen much, any more than male/female flirtation, and if anything, it likely is less amongst females as a gay woman can tell often if another girl is straight and isn't interested and would not bother. But I don't see that as an issue at all. I just think that when someone considers a school, they examine school climate and also the other "types" of kids who attend and how they feel they'd fit in. I don't see this as any different than other t ypes of kids and it is not a gay issue per se. For instance, if a school had a party hardy set of students and some kid was totally the opposite, they may feel the student body wasn't their type. If the student body was very Greek and they were not into Greek, same thing. If the student body was overly studious and they were not, same thing. If the student body was tree hugging granola types and a kid is very conservative or very into high fashion stuff, might be same thing. It depends on what you want in a school, how you feel you'd fit in, etc. </p>
<p>I think many straight women love Smith. We know several from our community who do. My D liked lots about this college, but prefered a coed school in the end and her reason had nothing to do with the gay population. All women colleges are great at what they do and have many many plusses but they are not for all people. And the climate and student body as a whole needs to fit what a kid wants. A kid need not be like everyone else who attends but needs to feel that they'd fit in and find some like minded souls with similar interests. I think that can happen at Smith and at many other schools. But as we know, every college is not a good fit for every kid and so a visit is in order and the kind of question the OP asked is a valid one and NEVER came across at all as homophobic and in fact, she acknowledges her D's comfort among gay women. By the way, my other D goes to school with lots of gay males who are some of her closest pals.</p>
<p>I think Smith is a fantastic school but I don't think it is for everyone. I think Yale is a fantastic school but it also is not for everyone. I think my own kids' chosen colleges, Brown and NYU/Tisch, are great for THEM but I can see how others may not feel like these schools are good fits for them.</p>
<p>PS, I think it would be denial to ignore the factual percentage of lesbian or bi's on Smith's campus and would be misleading to say otherwise. As well, it is a known fact that Northampton is gay friendly. It is a place where women can feel at ease to walk with their arms around one another. I could say the same thing of all the time I have spent in Provincetown, MA where gay men and women can be very open about their sexuality and in fact, the town has a significant gay population. It is just a fact. And then there are places like where Brokeback Mountain is set where being openly gay is a big no no and is not acceptable. Smith and Northampton are not such a place. It is not an accident that college guide books mention that Smith is a place where feminism is strong and gay rights is a big issue with lots of activism. So, you won't see that description at say, Notre Dame, Clemson, or SMU necessarily. So, there is some basis for these generalizations.</p>
<p>During my D's freshman orientation at Bryn Mawr, one of the Customswomen mentioned that in any given year, the lesbian/Bi population was anywhere between 11-13%, and that the great majority of students self-identified as heterosexual. I don't know if there are any official, published numbers that would either dispute or confirm these numbers, however. D is straight, as are most of her friends, but she also has several friends at BMC who are either lesbian or Bi-sexual.</p>