I think that there are a number of things to address:
Luxury goods: Luxury goods aren’t what we always think of them. First off, travel is expensive and is a popular activity. And although there are those who are a fan of Chanel bags and Rolex watches that almost everyone over the age of 30 has heard of, there are things that are extraordinarily popular and expensive that the under-30 crowd appreciates. For instance, a few years ago I had never heard of the brand Supreme. But a nephew has gotten into the scene with the drops and getting access and wore shoes that were $1k on the reseller’s market (he did not pay that much, but was going to resell after he’d worn them for a bit). I’m sure there are many other brands that have a similar impact, some likely include various types of sneakers.
If the parents posting here are highly representative of the parents with their seniors in high school, most of the “kids” mentioned here had stellar stats, leadership, awards, and extracurriculars. These kids, 99 times out of 100, are going to be just fine financially. Many people have lived at home for a brief periods of time in order to save money for big expenses (college loans, down payments, etc).
I suspect that the article might be talking about the people who maybe stopped going to college during the pandemic and aren’t inclined to go back. Or people who haven’t had a lot of academic or vocational drive. They may have a job, but it probably doesn’t pay more than $15 or so an hour (largely due to the increases in pay demand, not what the pay would have been five years ago). These are the ones who may not necessarily be saving up for a particular purpose, but are more just, not launching. Perhaps it’s more prevalent in areas with a high cost-of-living, but I suspect that it’s a nationwide phenomenon. People in areas with a lower cost of living may instead just have difficulty finding jobs or jobs “with a future” and just feel more dispirited.
There’s a real trend of living at home. Real estate has gotten a lot more expensive after all.
As for avocado toast or luxury goods, that seems like the same old genre of kids these days are so much worse than when we were young that has been going on for at least a century.
I have two at home. The youngest wanted to move out, but then realized that paying $3000 per month (1 bdrm) in our area, close to work, was ridiculous. He’s staying until rents get “stable”.
Youngest just got a job and owes a ton in loans. She has lived and traveled all over the world (hence the loans) so I don’t see her as wanting to move out any time, soon. She spends on Banana Republic, flights to see friends, and goes out locally to eat with friends.
She likes living at home without real responsibilities, whereas Dad and I want her to launch. She would be able to afford it IF she curtailed her travel and social butterflying everywhere.
My kids are a little older so Millennial but both expect to buy houses and are both thinking about it. Travel is the only thing that ShawSon spends money on. He spends a fair bit on takeout food, I’d guess. ShawD does not but goes out for nice meals.
My 26 year old hadn’t really been home since sophomore year in college summer, after she graduated in 2018 she moved in with my dad as his caretaker (Alzheimer’s) so she could study for her cpa exams. He had a heart attack and passed away 12/18, so she did a combo of living at home/couch surfing (again frugal) until moving in with her boyfriend when Covid hit (our other 4 were home working/college/high school remotely, along with my husband). She’s hoping to find others to live with in the spring. She could pay her loans off completely but is holding out hope for loan forgiveness (I think she should just pay them but it’s her choice at this point). I think with two 19 year olds we are a ways away from an empty next.
Not for time for sure. And we are in LA so my son doesn’t wear his Rolex to any Beverly Hills restaurants because of the multiple robberies targeting watches
You’d love my neighbors! Three grown children home ranging from 24-27 with 1 away at college. And they live in a fairly small home! I honestly don’t know how they do it. I see the kids hanging out in their cars for long periods of time just to get away from the fam ( or to smoke a joint).
One approach I’ve heard of (though YMMV, as always): kid is able to live at parents’ home, but has to pay rent, at some percentage of local market rental rates. (75%? 50%? 90%? depends on your situation, how much the kid makes, how badly the parents want them to get motivated to move out, etc.) All of the money that they pay goes into a “down payment” fund so when they’re ready to buy something, they can tap that fund and have some additional money to go towards it.
I like this idea. My DH has a work colleague who did this…didn’t tell the kid that’s what they were doing, though. Kid had a nice surprise many many months later.
Although money (eg college debt) is obviously a factor, it seems to me that part of the rationale to move back home depends on how attached a family is to the neighborhood they grew up in. We like living in Silicon Valley but have no other family here. So we’ve never encouraged our kids to consider coming back here after college. More the opposite: given how expensive it is we feel they’ll have a better standard of living elsewhere. But many other families we know (especially those who grew up here themselves) do really want their kids to stay in the area, and either offer them a free place to stay, subsidize their rent, or even more extreme, buy them an apartment.
I decided to give pocket watches as gifts to my groomsmen – the research and purchasing were a phase, but for a good year I was really into them.
Turns out my great-grandfather had a Hamilton, and it was in a drawer somewhere. So I got that one.
My dad’s folks had an Illinois, which became another gift to me.
The Hamilton was from like 1912 and the Illinois from maybe the 20s.
I bought the guys another Illinois, a Waltham, one manufactured in the USSR featuring a Soviet ship (he’s pretty crunchy, and loves boats), and a pilot’s pocket watch for my brother in law (a pilot).
You do realize that in many cultures, young adults aren’t in a rush to get an apartment and don’t move out until they get married? I don’t get why you find that so offensive/unhealthy. It’s your personal choice if you want your kids out of the house after high school.
Mine were proud to be independent self-supporting adults when they graduated. If they couldnt have afforded rent, they would have either changed locations or changed jobs to make it work. I understand moving home for a limited time with a specific goal, but otherwise it seems to often lead to delayed maturity and poor decision-making unless both parties set and enforce guidelines. While I cherish their visits, I am happy for them that they have lauched. If that means no fancy watches or exotic trips, that is ok.
As expected, they are friends with similar young adults.
But as mentioned in another post, in some cultures this is the norm. Also, I see more families seeing it as a waste of money to leave the nest just for the sake of doing it. If a young adult is gainfully employed, saving money, contributes to the household and all parties enjoy living under one roof and respect one another, I don’t see the big deal.
Agreed. It just often seems, per this article, that the situation is sometimes used to bankroll luxury goods rather than saving money or contributing to household expenses.
My dad did something similar. He charged me (the oldest) rent when I lived there for 5 months after college graduation. When I got my real job (I was waiting tables while interviewing for my real job), my dad gave me every penny I had been giving him. It was to be used for anything related to setting up my new home.
He made me promise not to tell my three younger sisters. After dad died, and 20 or more years after the youngest moved out, we had a chat and this subject actually came up. He did the same for all four of us…and made us all promise not to tell…even the youngest!
It was a great gift…and one I know my sisters and I will never forget.
