Getting Unlucky, or did I do something wrong?

For in-state residents, it depends on the state / school. Some do better (e.g. CA), and some do worse (e.g. PA, IL). CT appears to be in the “worse” category, since the UConn net price calculator at http://financialaid.uconn.edu/pricecalc/ suggests a $16,018 net price for the highest need Connecticut resident student; that amount is not generally considered realistic for the student to self-fund with federal direct loans and summer and part-time work earnings.