<p>So, last year (my freshman year), I lived next door to this girl...let's call her "Gertrude". Well, Gertrude was really nice to me, and actually took time to talk to me (I'm a pretty shy guy). Well, as the year went on, we became pretty close and I found myself totally falling for her. So, one night we were just hanging out in her room, and her roommate left to go hang out with some friends. And right then, it seemed like the mood totally changed. I think she wanted me to make a move, but I'm a shy guy! I don't make moves! :( And after that night, I felt like our relationship deteriorated a little.</p>
<p>Well, we decided to try to live near each other next year, so we coordinated during room sign-ups and we are living on the same floor again next year! </p>
<p>But what do I do? How do I know when to make a move? Did she expect me to go ALL THE WAY? That seems just so EXTREME to me, but then again, this is college and I feel inexperienced ALL AROUND.</p>
<p>This is cute. Um, there was probably just some tension in the room at that point. If you're not feeling comfortable going to the next level (i.e. dating) or whatever, don't push it. Go at your own pace. More importantly, if you respect her and eventually want to go out with her, just take it slow and get to know her better. Right now it sounds really sweet but leave it at friends and get to know her better.</p>
<p>This is like, the beginning of a really bad summer romantic comedy, where you do something totally stupid and hilarious and disgusting and hurtful to the girl, like, become a porn star to gain confidence, and in the end she grows to love you more for it because of your loving intentions.</p>
<p>Oh yeah, and during the summer she gets with some meathead who doesn't treat her right and you have to show him up and show her that even though you're just a shy guy, you have the heart or whatever cheesy cliche is in vogue this summer.</p>
<p>OoOo sexy. That type of tension is a good thing. It makes everything exciting and sexy as hell. =D Use it to your advantage. Release the inner sexy beast in you.</p>
<p>Hmm, not sure about the whole living on the same floor thing. Sure it will make the sex more convenient, but if things go sour, then it might be a bit awkward, but then again it will only be awkward if you let it be. </p>
<p>What ever you do, don't be "just a friend" or be in the "friends zone", which is:</p>
<p>"a mutual problem where two people are "trapped in that place of hopelessness and desperation", when they don't want to "risk ruining the friendship if everything crashed and burned"</p>
<p>"Y'see, when a girl decides that you're her friend, you're no longer a dating option. You become a complete non-sexual entity in her eyes, like a brother... or a lamp. " - From "Just Friends" Movie</p>
<p>I think you already know when to make a move, seeing as you pointed out the situation with the roommate and what not. As far as HOW to do it, ask emm or pink if you could practice on them. Hell, for the right price, you could practice on me.</p>
<p>talk to her friends?...maybe they'll tell u some stuff...
that little event u had could have been planned...her friend leaving u 2 alone...LOL...just try to keep close until u know what to do
u need to bang her before someone else does...(i.e. me) hah</p>
<p>Talking to her friends is iffy. Friends of the person you are interested in usually like to play "matchmaker" but usually **** **** up, REALLY BADLY. But again, this varies, so use your own judgment.</p>
<p>It's pretty simple. Just ask her out. That way if she says yes "making a move" would not be out of the blue, but even expected. </p>
<p>And don't worry, if she knows you well, she'll know you're shy. So don't fret over that. Build your confidence up and realize that girls aren't anything to worry about (unless you dump us for our sisters, then hide your knives). </p>
<p>Also, the friends zone thing is a myth. We girls only say stuff like "I just want to be friends" for it to be an easy let down. If you're in the friends zone, it's because we don't want to date you. Saying you're like our brother is a kinder way of saying "I don't want to date you." But it also means we really value your friendship and it's not a personal mark against you. We just sometimes know that it won't work out on a relationship level. So don't be afraid of becoming friends with girls. I'd rather date my best friend than some guy who keeps trying to make sexual advances because he's terrified I'll only figure him as a friend.</p>
<p>Of course this doesn't apply to everyone. But it's my view on things.</p>
<p>hey, i'm glad this is on the forum, it gets pretty monotonous with all the "what classes should i take" ish.</p>
<p>if you find yourself sitting with her in a room alone again, and you don't know what to do, just try putting your hand on hers. it's a safely ambiguous gesture (as in, one that you can recover from by saying you're just so glad you're friends, if it backfires), but her response will tell you everything. if she pulls her hand away: burned. if she turns her palm over so you're holding hands: golden! if she just leaves it there she's as shy and indecisive as you are and you're both screwed ;)</p>
<p>...i just found it funny when he said "Did she expect me to go ALL THE WAY?"</p>
<p>gosh darn, what is your definition of "all the way"? just wanna confirm. haha. </p>
<p>but, if you're reading her as being interested in you, then a lingering hand should be good, if not a "surprise" kiss on the cheek. well, my gf gave me a surprise kiss, but yea.</p>
<p>After a break-up, how does one avoid getting a rebound? It's been about a month and I think I'm starting to get over him rapidly... It appears that I've another love interest and I don't want to leave him as a rebound. I think I'll wait a month and see how it develops... I just miss dating... and men. Really hot men. :(</p>
<p>OMG answer my question LOL it's always interesting to see how CCers deal with this! :)</p>
<p>Take her to Sawtelle and go to Volcano Tea and Beard Papa's for dessert and take pics at the Japanese pic machines and sing Karaoke downstairs! Wish a guy would do that for me... :( It's really sexy!</p>
<p>I don't understand Pesky. She said "friend zone is not a myth" and then confirmed all the properties of the friend zone. </p>
<p>That said, guys in my friend zone aren't necessarily undateable. Except for the ones I wouldn't do. Wait, so that means the ones I would do aren't in the zone? Dude, I'm confused.</p>
<p>ihasamilk,
That is kinda how my b/f and I started. We were living on the same floor but we were both kinda afraid to make the first move. Trust me, if you think there's something special between you and this girl, you should ask her out to do something casual (campus movie, go out for dessert in westwood, take a walk around campus, play a game) - see how she acts. does she want you to hold her hand? does she make a lot of physical contact with you? is she smiling a lot? is she flirting with you? this kind of stuff typically will mean she's into you too. I would advise you not to wait too long to ask her out only because, if you wait too long she may give up hope and lose interest. </p>
<p>mme-lin,
I don't think that there's really a set time-limit after a break-up... it all depends on how you feel after a break-up. I've had times where it didn't really phase me that a boyfriend and I broke up and I've been able to immediately start dating again. But I've also had times where I was hurt too much after a break-up that I couldn't even think about dating again for a couple months. If you think you're ready, then you probably are but, in my own experience my rule of thumb is that it would only count as a rebound if when you were with this new guy, you were still thinking about your ex. So, if you notice that you still think about him when this new guy is around (or a lot when he's not around) then you should hold off dating him until all thoughts of the ex are gone if you don't want the new guy to be the rebound guy. Does that make any sense? Anyway, I hope I helped a little...</p>