<p>One of my husband’s relatives will be attending UA in the Fall. She is from a Mid Atlantic State and is a NMSF. From what I have read on this forum, everyone who attends UA (or who at leasts posts on CC) loves the school. The opportunities seem fabulous, and the scholarship that she was given is amazing.</p>
<p>We saw her a few weeks ago, and I congratulated her at her acceptance and her upcoming enrollment. She sort of shrugged it off, and said “I am only going because of the scholarship.” She is clearly attending solely due to the financial benefits, which her mother even stated. The talk around the table turned to football tickets. She said “I have no interest in going to any football games. I really do not like sports at all.” I told her (thanks to the posters in this forum) “You should learn to appreciate the UA sports, since that is where the money is from your scholarship is coming from.” I seemed to know more about UA than she did, which I thought was sad. She has no intention of attending the sorority recruitment week, since she didn’t want to be there 'so early." </p>
<p>Do kids who go to UA with this sort of attitude learn to love the school like all of you do? I am concerned that she will be miserable by not takign advantage of the opportunities and will be a 14 hour car ride from home.</p>
<p>I am sure that not everyone loves the UA as much as we do, but I am also sure that with that attitude it will be harder to have the “love”. Perhaps you can point her to this forum and she can read some of the great posts here and get a feel for the students and the many opportunities that await her.
If she is not interested, maybe you could cut and paste a few things of interest for her. Has she visited the university? I hope so because it would help her get a feel for the university and the students. Is she going to Bama Bound soon? That visit might generate some enthusiasm for her choice. Talk with her and be positive, then perhaps she will perk up. I guess if necessary, she could always transfer.</p>
<p>I don’t think you have to like sports or join in Greek life to enjoy life at UA. If D2 attends it will be in spite of football and sororities, although I know that’s not the mindset of most on campus (or who post here.) But she would be excited about Blount and the English department and you can count that we’d be making sure that she was exhibiting gratitude for the scholarship, KWIM? There are lots of other great things to be involved in, but going in with a chip on your shoulder isn’t a good thing in any situation. </p>
<p>Is there any chance she’d be interested in Alabama Action or Outdoor Action? That’s a great way for OOS students to meet other honors college students. Which Bama Bound is she attending? Being on campus might help turn her attitude around.</p>
<p>As much as D1 loves UA it isn’t the right school for everyone. I’m sorry if that’s your relative’s only financial safety and she feels as if she’s being “forced” to go there. That’s one of the reasons why I think students should try to identify 2 financial safeties so that in even the worst case financial scenario, they still feel like they have a choice.</p>
<p>My D isn’t a big football fan. In fact, one of the schools she gave a fair amount of consideration to attending is in Boston and doesn’t even have a football team. She isn’t going greek (at least she has no plans to) and yet she plans to love her next four years. I even expect that she will enjoy the gameday experience. </p>
<p>Attitude is so important in anything we do in life, but your relative might find herself pleasantly and unexpectedly surprised. I do hope she can manufacture some enthusiasm because this summer should be a time of anticipation and excitement.</p>
<p>Since Bama seems to be her only financial safety, you might suggest some things that she can pro-actively do to improve her “Bama Experience.”</p>
<p>Definitely encourage her to get football tix. Since frosh only get a half set, it’s not asking too much for her to attend at least a couple of games. The home games are more than just football…it’s food, music, dancing, singing, the band, the twirlers, and the game. </p>
<p>What is her major?</p>
<p>Encourage her to be there for the entire WOW Week. Is she doing Alabama Action? if not, I’d encourage her to sign up for that if there still are spots.</p>
<p>Encourage her to visit this forum.</p>
<p>My older son wasn’t excited about attending Bama until he got accepted to CBHP. He had NO INTEREST in football at all. He did get tix and quickly fell in love with the Crimson Tide. He’s still a big fan even though he’s graduated.</p>
<p>My little sister started out at Northwestern and didn’t like it, transferred to Bama and was much happier there. She had no interest in spectator sports or Greeks either. There are something like 450 clubs on campus, certainly something for everyone.</p>
<p>When we met with our area recruiter last week she indicated she doesn’t get into the football scene but she loves to attend gymnastic events and I saw the UA Winter Guard perform recently at the World Championships and they are amazing! If she want to find something she likes I am sure there is something for her out there, but likewise if she wants to not like anything… well…</p>
<p>We live in the Age of Entitlement, in which wants trump needs in the minds self-made, self-defined victims. </p>
<p>Literally every student in my high school graduating class went to college in-state, save one (the lone Mormon who went to BYU). Why? Because it was affordable. </p>
<p>“Like what you have,” our elders told us. Had we pouted about our college options, they would have likely asked if we wanted some cheese to go with our whine.</p>
<p>Somehow it all worked out for most us, for as the Mary Chapin Carpenter lyric so aptly proclaims, “Accidents and inspiration lead you to your destination.”</p>
<p>I’m assuming the lass who is the subject of this thread is coming to Alabama by virtue of accident: being born into a family with financial need. She had no choice in the matter. But she has enormous choice in the degree to which she elects to be inspired or insipid in her approach to this accident called Alabama.</p>
<p>If she chooses inspiration, she will find that all roads lead to Rome. Anything less and her accident will end up looking like a train wreck.</p>
<p>My guess is the less attention that is given to her pity party, the sooner she’ll join the real party going on at 'Bama. The next time she shrugs with indifference, return the favor.</p>
<p>Wow Malanai – out of the hundreds of posts I’ve read on here in the last few years, that was the one that grabbed me in the gut. The young lady in question here is very lucky to have someone who cares about her enough to try to encourage an “attitude adjustment.” I’ll add that my daughter initially had some wild college ideas, all involving great distance from her home and no practical way to pay for any of it since they didn’t give the kind of NMF money that Alabama gives. The kind folks in the Honors College worked hard to help her see how she would fit in, even after she didn’t move on in the UFE interviews. A year later, she is involved and happy in ways we never would have anticipated and grateful for the money she is storing away for graduate school. I hope this young lady will have a similar positive experience. </p>
<p>PS I love Mary Chapin Carpenter and have tickets to see her in August at Atlanta Botanical Garden!</p>
<p>It’s always possible that the young lady in question is more enthused about UA than she lets on. Perhaps she’s had the experience that many on these boards have described - having her choice questioned by everyone she mentions her college choice to. I can see where saying “I’m only going for the scholarship” could become the standard answer in that case.</p>
<p>My D fortunately has NOT had that experience. No one has asked her why she’s going to Bama, or told her she could do better than that. I cringe when I read about all the kids (especially the NMFs) who feel the need to justify their choice to go to UA. My D is tremendously excited to be headed to Tuscaloosa, but I can see where that excitement could be tempered by the thoughts and comments of others. OP, I’d continue to bring up all the great things about Alabama to your relative. Regardless of the source of her bad attitude, hearing the positives about her new school can only help in an attitude adjustment.</p>
<p>"The kind folks in the Honors College worked hard to help her see how she would fit in, "</p>
<p>this brings up an important point. Has the young lady done an honors college visit? </p>
<p>If not, when is her Bama Bound? Perhaps she can arrive a day early or stay thru Day 2 afternoon and meet with the Honors College people (arranged in advance by Allison and Susan)</p>
<p>At this point, my D has been asked numerous times why she chose Bama. But only a couple of those times was it asked with an underlying “couldn’t you do better”. And even then it may have been because they might have known the schools that D was applying to. I think no matter what school from her list she chose, she’d get the same question. Around here (at her HS anyway), if you don’t go UT, A&M or Baylor, people wonder why you are leaving the promised land and they will ask. As far as most parents are concerned. Texas has ‘mighty fine’ schools and there is no need to go elsewhere. My humble D just talks about how much she loves Bama, the honors college, and so forth. I’m not above throwing in that she is getting a great scholarship. It’s not why she chose the school but it is what put it on her radar. </p>
<p>There are worse reasons to attend a school than for a scholarship. (I think following a bf or gf is one of them). Many, probably most athletes end up at schools that weren’t their dream but have a great experience. OTOH, my baseball son went to a school only for baseball, wasn’t expecting to like it, didn’t like it and transferred. It can be hard to overcome a negative attitude.</p>
<p>My DS had a twinge of “I wish I had applied to a few more schools” as other students were getting their acceptances. He felt a little left out, honestly. But as financial aid offers were coming in, he was more than convinced that he made the right choice financially, as well as academically. The few that had any financial aid had large loans incuded, and significant work study packages. As he learned about thier long term financial committments, as well as working while attending school the first year, he was more convinced he made the right choice. </p>
<p>When friends started saying to him “wish I had applied to Alabama”, that really helped! </p>
<p>she may still change her mind. There are other NMF scholarships out there she could have persued, and chose not to. So she may be having a little buyers remorse right now. Or it could be a teen angst issue that she will either get over, or it will get over her. </p>
<p>My son is more than happy to say that he was accepted to 100% of the schools he applied to, and that 100% of the schools he applied to offered him a HUGE merit package. Roll Tide!</p>
<p>I never asked her why she chose UA. College selection is a personal choice, but I am a firm believer in “fit.”</p>
<p>I know that she went for a visit sometime in the Winter, since she had to do an audition for her major, but I am not sure if it was considered an Honors College visit. Part of the issue is that her parents are divorced. They have saved for college, so they could afford other options. All along the college process, her mom said “she is going to the place that gives her the most money.” She did receive large merit scholarships to other schools, but none as significant as UA.Her mom is now telling people “Since we don’t have to pay tuition, I can buy my retirement home in Florida sooner.” </p>
<p>When my D was looking at schools near where the girl lives, we spent some time with her family. My D is one year older than the girl. Her mom said “Why don’t you girls talk about the whole college process.” Her response was “D1 and I have nothing in common, she wants to be an engineer, and I don’t. What could we possibly talk about?”</p>
<p>I hope that she can make friends and learn to enjoy her experience at UA.</p>
<p>I know that she went for a visit sometime in the Winter, since she had to do an audition for her major, but I am not sure if it was considered an Honors College visit.</p>
<p>What is her major? Is it related to an instrument? Musical Theater? </p>
<p>Again, I would encourage her to either arrive early or stay a bit later for Bama Bound and have the Honors College faculty meet with her. (Did she apply to the HC? If not, have her do so now.) </p>
<p>While Bama may not be a “fit” for everyone, it offers enough variety that it can be a good “fit” for many, many different types of students.</p>
<p>She is double majoring, with Theater being one of her majors. Hopefully, she will meet other students with an interest in theater. </p>
<p>She said she applied to the HC, but only recently. She mentioned that she wanted to do a quick orientation visit. Her mom is going with her for the orientation, and they are both staying in the dorms.</p>
<p>If she is involved in music performance (instrument, voice) or in MT, I think she will readily change her mind and attitude. My son is involved in music performance (not as a major) and has nothing but great things to say about the professors and his fellow student colleagues. The level of expertise and professionalism among the people at Moody is apparent once you meet them.</p>
<p>y. She mentioned that she wanted to do a quick orientation visit. Her mom is going with her for the orientation, and they are both staying in the dorms.</p>
<p>Well, I hope she takes advantage of the BB time and doesn’t skip any of the socializing (pool party and Ridgecrest South game room social afterwards). * *The words “quick visit” are not encouraging. * If you speak to her mom, encourage her to make appts with the HC for either before or after BB.</p>
<p>Susan Alley
Assistant Coordinator
270 Nott Hall
205-348-5599
<a href=“mailto:susan.alley@ua.edu”>susan.alley@ua.edu</a></p>
<p>Have them send Allison and Susan an email mentioning the NMF status, Fall enrollment, majors, etc. Ask to meet with some of the honors college faculty. Since she’s going to Bama, it’s not necessary for her to have dorm tours or faculty visits within her majors, but meeting with some Honors faculty will let them tell her about all the HC offers.</p>
<p>For my D, Alabama wasn’t her first choice as well. In fact, she didn’t even want to apply, but we insisted because of the scholarship. She had her heart set on Georgia Tech. But, GT only gives a certain amount of President’s scholarships, and there were 8500 applicants; so she got NO scholarships there at all. She was extremely disappointed. She got good scholarships from Purdue and Case Western as well, but Alabama was definitely the less expensive choice.</p>
<p>What changed her attitude was a campus visit, one that was individualized and tailored to her needs that included honors college session with Dr. Oneal, a talk with one of the chemical engineering professors, and the MDB. When she heard about the credentials of the honors college, with study abroad options, research, the academic caliber of the students, etc, she started to come around.</p>
<p>Now, she’s so excited. She wanted to go to the first honors Bama Bound session, so we’ll be there next Tuesday and Wednesday.</p>
<p>Hopefully, all the freshmen when they arrive will become involved with some activity- band, sorority, the numerous student activity groups, that they will be glad that they came.</p>