<p>In our state the cutoff is September 1. But many of the kids I know with July/August birthdays wait it out for a year. If academic progress or boredom is an issue, many go to Montessori or TK.</p>
<p>My youngest sons b-day is at the end of February and believe it or not, that always <em>felt</em> late, especially when everyone was turning 16 and showing up at school with bright shiny new cars! :(</p>
<p>I don't think he would have ever had a chance in baseball (he was a pitcher) if he had started school a year early. He was sort of a late bloomer physically anyway (didn't start growing until 9th grade), and most of the other kids towered over him until he was a junior. He had osgood slaugters all through 10th and part of 11th grade, and the step off the mound killed him. Finally by 12th he had finished growing and it sure did feel good.</p>
<p>When it came to leadership within the school itself, it always seemed to me that there was a sort of "big brother" phenomona working. IOW, the older kids naturally start out as the more mature students, are given more responsibility within the classroom throughout elementary/junior high, and sort of develop the persona of the school leaders. When everyone gets into high school, their reputations, confidence, and experience precede them. They tend to continue in their role of "oldest sibling" and end up as student body officers, Honor Council members, and NHS leaders.</p>
<p>Since girls naturally mature earlier than boys, I don't think you find this as much with them. But there seems to be a marked difference in boys who are very young or very old when it comes to peer group leadership.</p>
<p>Honestly, I don't think the issue is the future "vals and sals", who are generally fine. The issue is boys (and some girls) who scuffle a bit. With them, I think there's a real (if slight) advantage in having them be older than everyone else through school. It makes it easier for them to win respect by beating up the future vals and sals who are sneering at them.</p>
<p>Packmom: Exactly. My children (Early Oct and December Birthdays) started school in a state with September cutoff. By high school they were living in a state with a December cutoff, and are both among the oldest in their classes. My son in particular was over a full year old than some of his classmates, and turned 18 back in the fall of his senior year. </p>
<p>By comparison, my birthday is the same week in October as his, but my parents, anxious to get me in school, sent me to a private school to avoid a September cutoff. As a result, I was still 17 when I started college.</p>
<p>My husband's bday is in November and he too started school early- graduated at 17. He joined the service and ended up in Vietnam. It just blows my mind when I compare that to most of the 17 year olds I know today. It was a different time...</p>
<p>
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...the older kids naturally start out as the more mature students, are given more responsibility within the classroom throughout elementary/junior high, and sort of develop the persona of the school leaders. When everyone gets into high school, their reputations, confidence, and experience precede them.
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I have seen this as well. We struggled with the decision about holding late August son back. He had cross-dominance (couldn't decide whether to be a lefty or righty -- still is ambedexterous in some ways -- bats & shoots hockey/lacrosse righty, writes & throws lefty) which put him far behind with fine motor tasks. Pre K Teachers were torn, as well. His academics/vocab were quite good. We opted to send him on time, as we worried about the "big, bored bully" problems that can surface with 18 & 19 year old h.s. seniors. </p>
<p>Now as a ten year old, he's the shortest boy in the whole grade. Sports are important to him, and he hates being the little guy. Some of his classmates are well into puberty & he looks like someone's little brothr is tagging along with the gang. He will be tall, but our family hits puberty very, very late & we continue to grow in college. A ten year old isn't believing that right now! He also has ADD, so he's often the kid with the sloppiest desk who leaves his books in the last classroom when kids are changing for various subjects. I really think an extra year would have been tremendously helpful for him, because those "executive functioning" skills are improving by leaps and bounds -- but he's still behind the curve when stacked up against kids more than a year older than he.</p>
<p>So it is a boy by boy decision. Yet the numbers of boys being left back is enormous, and the summer/fall birthday boys seem even younger by comparison as the trend continues.</p>
<p>When I was a child I don't know if there was a cut-off date for beginning school, and if there was it was probably January. My birthday is in September and my husbands is in December, we were both some of the youngest kids in our classes. Since we were both the younger children in our families, our Mom's probably couldn't wait for us to start school and get out of the house. If we had started school with those birthdays now, we would have graduated a year later. That's just how it was. We most likely weren't ready for school that young, but in the late 50's I don't know how many parents even thought that was an option.</p>
<p>Our schools here have a hard and fast cut-off date of September 1. If you are born September 2, you will have to wait a year. For our oldest son, it was suggested that he go to pre-first. We did that not to make him more competitive but so that he could succeed and become more mature. I think many parents are doing the same thing when they "hold back" their children - it's not for the competitive edge, it's because educators have told them and their gut feeling is that their children are just not ready.</p>
<p>I just read Stickershocks post and want to agree that size can also play a part in how mature a child feels about himself. My boys both have May birthdays and our youngest one is one of the very shortest in his class and definately feels out of place sometimes because of his size. Another year may well have helped with that. I think small guys really have to compensate for their height by being very good at something else to make them feel good about themselves.</p>
<p>A slightly different take on some of these responses: A family member with an August 3 birthday in an August 1 cutoff school district was then held back in second grade because of developmental delays and ADD (I always wondered about the wisdom of that decision, but it was none of my business). She just turned 16 and is entering 9th grade. Academically she has done extremely well--practically a straight A student, etc. But socially, she is pretty frustrated much of the time because her grade-level peers are emotionally a lot younger. So the social "advantage" is not always an advantage. My wish is that her mom (single parent) would work on having her graduate in three years and then enroll in community college; their local CC is excellent. I'll bet she could handle the work, and she'd probably be happy.</p>
<p>Geezermom, having a kid repeat a grade because of ADD is never done here. It's not a maturity issue; it a complicated brain chemisty disorder that will always be with the person. Learning how to deal with the lack of focus is ongoing, not something that repeating a year will fix. ADD kids are often super bright (Edison & Einstein & Ben Franklin are said to have exhibited classic ADD.) MY D just turned 16 & is entering 11th grade. She'd be going nuts if she was just heading to h.s.! I really feel for your niece.</p>
<p>I like mixed age classrooms- both my kids have early summer birthdays-and both have learning challenges that have made school difficult.
The oldest was in a 5s program then she went to an elementary school with a K-1-2 class. This suited her well, as she was a very young premie, she physcially was very petite, although she had taught herself to read at three and liked the academic challenges of school, she also had gross motor delay, which was tough on the playground.
In elementary school, it was ok- because of the mixed ages, but then when she started middle school, it was still difficult because of the young for her age piece.
As when she finished high school, she was still not ready for college, she took a year off and I think it made a big difference.</p>
<p>I started kindergarten in the early 60s when I was 4. I was always the smallest in the class, didn't have motor skills to match the other kids & was very socially awkward to boot. ( Im trying to make up for lost time ;) )</p>
<p>I'm in Oregon as well, sishu, and agree with you. It's more common to skip a grade than to be held back. But I know many people in both situations. Personally I did neither, but have a summer birthday and so I've always been young for my grade (graduated at 17).</p>
<p>we don't skip grades here- usually- although my D did have a friend who skipped high school and went straight to the University of Washington.( and another friend who did Running start for a few years in high school, and started at UChicago as a junior- when he was 17)
( there is a special program for that- they start in what would be their last year or so of middle school and do high school curriculum in about a year- its on the campus of UW)</p>
<p>There is also a highly gifted track through the Seattle public schools and of course many districts have gifted programs and AP or IB courses.
Socially/emotionally, kids aren't necessarily advanced and as many of the parents have found if we had early readers, just because your kid could read at a high school level at 6, didn't mean that * that, material* was appropriate! :eek:</p>
<p>Im also reminded of a CSI episode where the 11 year old, entered high school and was ostracized pretty badly.
We seem to be dealing with it by pushing down curriculum. Kindergarten ( I think we did this thread before) used to be about getting used to a classroom setting, learning colors and nursery songs. First grade ( OMG I hate Dick and Jane) was about learning to read, * extremely* simple books.
Not that I want to go back there!
I knew how to read before K, which was why I started K early I guess ( plus I think my mom wanted me out of the house), so to read Dick and Jane in 1st grade was pretty excruitating, but we weren't allowed to go at own pace for anything. That didn't change all through grade school.</p>
<p>Now a high school is lacking if they don't offer lots of AP courses and a student is slacking if they don't take 4 or 5 before graduation.</p>