<p>This is mostly for future reference. Don't think I'm pretentious. I'm asking on an anonymous forum because no one knows me here. </p>
<p>Recently, two people asked me out. I went out with the first one, but I don't think we clicked (but he somehow thinks we did). Tonight, a different someone asked me out for a future date (like 3 weeks later after he comes back from some overseas excursion). We've been friendly to each other, but I have a feeling he's not my type. It's not just that he's 4 years older (I don't really have set age limits as long as the age difference is reasonable)... I have a feeling that I won't click with this particular someone. Also, I'm afraid of turning people down just as much as I'm afraid of getting turned down. </p>
<p>What are some good ways to turn people down besides just "I don't like you, sorry"?</p>
<p>The classic "My parents don't let me date"
"I think we should just be friends"
"I already have a boyfriend"
"Um.. no" <em>laughs</em>
"I have something in my eye, I think its contagious."
"I have a track meet"</p>
<p>all good stuff. I like the eye one the best, its non-cliched</p>
<p>hahaha im sorry, that eye one is really funny. she actually said that? </p>
<p>if the person doesn't know me that well I just say I have a bf, if the person knows me I just say I'm busy everytime and usually they get the hint. but usually I try to give them a chance (at least a date or two) unless I really can't stand them/they're creepy or w/e</p>
<p>I'M a guy, and sometimes you can just tell when a girl isn't to into you, so you just avoid asking her on a date. but a couple of times I have been rejected, the usually excuse, is just I can't, I have something to do this weekend or maybe some other time.</p>
<p>Lying is the worst thing to do. Just be honest and say that you don't feel comfortable going out with him right now ... maybe another time in your lives.</p>
<p>Or maybe suggest the two of you go out with a group of friends and not as a one-on-one date. It takes the pressure off the situation.</p>
<p>Lying isn't the worst thing to do if they're a skeez and don't know you. I had some guy come in where I work (a coffeehouse), and while I was making his drink he was asking me, y'know, how long I'd been working there and stuff. Innocent questions. Then he asked how old I was, and then he kept pestering me to hang out with him and his pals that night. I dind't have to lie in that case, I really did have plans to hang out with a guy that night, but the guy still didn't want to take no for an answer. Then lying is a good option.</p>
<p>hmm... the old "let's be friends" works... or i don't know how i feel... but that tends to lead them on. i learned that the hard way.</p>
<p>any ideas on trying to get the message of "i don't want to date anymore" to someone you've dated for about 15 months? my ex doesn't seem to get the message and keeps on calling everyday (like five times) and wanting to spend a lot of time, etc.</p>
<p>Well....you should always be honest and just say that you don't want to date him but let's face it, nowadays, people aren't exactly honest to others are they?</p>
<p>If you ask someone if he/she wants to hang out but he/she doesn't want to, he/she will just say "Ohh...I am busy that day" or "I got plans that day." The person will never tell you straight up that he/she doesn't want to hang with you. That's what I have experienced and learn about honesty and people nowadays. The honesty doesn't quite exist.</p>
<p>A word of caution with the "I see you as more of a friend tack": It is by far the safest way to go, in my opnion, but don't expect him not to nurse some hurt pride for at least a few days.</p>
<p>You have to be honest...I mean...I've tried the whole "constantly busy" thing, and some guys just don't get the hint and/or are madly in love. The nicest thing to say is, "Sorry, I just see you as a friend" (it's nicer than "I don't like you"...haha). Plus, you're not giving the guy any false hope/encouraging stalkers...</p>
<p>Ya, the line "I only see you as a friend" should work just fine. However, if the guy had no intention in dating and simply wanted to hang out, saying that you just want to be friends might lead to a little awkwardness. I remember I was talking to one my female friends once on AIM and she said "I only see you as a friend" and I was just like "That's great...except I am not interested in you..." I didnt actually say that but that thought ran through my mind.</p>
<p>Excuses aren't enough to stop me. If you give me an excuse, expect me to counter it.</p>
<p>The only way to turn a date down with the least amount of effort is the honest way - "No, I don't want to." This is a reason, not an excuse, and there's nothing I can say to counter it.</p>
<p>I don't think girls know how much "let's just be friends" really hurts.</p>
<p>question: how can you tell if you're asking someone out on a date? there seems to be a very fine line... a lot my female friends go to dinner and watch movies with their guy friends (me included) and it seems to be rather hard to tell if its supposed to be adate or not.</p>
<p>I pretty much reject everyone because I'm one of those people who only wants to date someone they reallyyyy like (while I'm in HS, anyway), and I just usually say that I'd be happy to hang out with them but only as friends. Then they usually decline the platonic-hang-out and I'm home free. lol</p>
<p>Um..if you pay for her, it's pretty much a date. If she makes an effort to look nicer than usual, she either likes you or thinks it's a date. </p>
<p>One time this guy picked me up and came to my door and got me, and in the car he was like, "Well, your dad was pretty cool with that.." And so I said, "Yeah, why wouldn't he be? It's not like we're dating or anything." ..and that was my attempt to get the message across. Unfortunately it didn't work with that guy, but if a girl says something that clear, seriously, don't think she doesn't mean it.</p>
<p>ah, actually.. about the paying thing: when me and my girl friends go out with guys (in a group or w/e) the guys usually pay if it's at a restaurant with a group tab if that makes sense? , even when it's clearly not a date. the guys we usually hang out with refuse to let us pay lol so i guess it depends</p>
<p>Wow. That's weird. What kinda guys do you hang out with, I need to find some of those. Whenever I go out with friends, its everybody for themselves. Except if I don't have money, then one of my guy friends is more likely to loan me a few bucks than one of the girls...</p>