<p>I am big on personal responsibility, but I am wondering if there is any way to reasonable address serious extenuating circumstances that I am certain impacted my son and his grades last year (still about a 3.75 cummulative, but he got his first and only "C" last year in an AP class).</p>
<p>Basically, without getting into to many details, starting in August his Great grandmother died, then there was a diagnosis of cancer with a close family member who died 3 months later, followed almost immediately by hospitalization of my wife for a sudden life threatening issue with a hospital stay, major surgury, recovery, and then the sudden illness and death of yet another very close family member shortly thereafter.</p>
<p>These were all in succession and ran through the entire year impacting our entire family. It was the year from hell, and I just feel that should be taken into account in some way...but I am loathe to raise this directly with any colleges as it still feels like an excuse. </p>
<p>Anything a parent says about a grade is 90% of the time going to be seen as sour grapes. It sure sounds like your child had a troublesome year, and in this situation your GC is your friend. A GC can make a notation on your child’s record when sending transcripts. If a school has required essays and then “optional essays” then I would say use the optional essay to explain the situation but I certainly would not use a required essay to rehash his junior year from hell unless he can spin into a life lesson kind of story.</p>
<p>Did all of his other grades also slip? Because if all of his other grades were about the same, then coming up with reasons for a C in one class begins to sound more like an excuse.</p>
<p>Mostly B’s, with the one C and a few A’s where he’d normally be mostly A’s and B’s.</p>
<p>The shift shows more clearly when looking at the numeric score versus the final grade (e.g. the B’s were in the mid to low 80’s versus low A’s and mid B’s).</p>
<p>And not to sound harsh, but I <em>do</em> think loosing a great grandmother, two grandparents to cancer, and very nearly loosing your mother, all on one year <em>is</em> a factor and not an excuse.</p>
<p>Anyway, it sounds like I should simply discuss this with his guidance counselor. He didn’t exactly fall off the wagon, but just had a rough year.</p>
<p>I have not discussed the context of the grades last year with him other than in general terms of it having been a rough year and to simply re-focus on this next year and show it was an anomoly by bringing his grades back to where he knows they should be. Hopefully actions will speak louder than words, but I would feel better putting last year in some form of context. I’ll see what the GC says.</p>
<p>I wd ask the GC to mention this year when writing his/her letter for colleges. As Chedva said, the second is a description of strength. And schools know that things happen to families that knock back grades — losing studying time to processing grief is not a sign of laziness in a kid.</p>
<p>Condolences to you, your son, and your family. I am glad to hear that your wife recovered. Have your son and family members received grief counseling?
I agree that it would be best for the guidance counselor to address this. But there is also a space in the Common App to explain any extenuating circumstances, so he might consider indicating this, with the spin that despite all of this, he was able to maintain a 3.75 average. Did he take the AP test for this class and what score did he get? If his score is a 4 or 5, he could submit it to the college.</p>
<p>It will be important for your son to do very well this fall (I assume it’s his senior year) to off set his junior year. It will give credence that last year was a tough year and he is not just going on a downward trend (as courses get harder).</p>
<p>Rockmtndad - I am sorry to hear about your year frm H3ll. I totally understand where you are coming from. Our situation is not nearly as life changing as your but it did have an impact on Ds school performance.</p>
<p>My D is a sophmore and had unexpected surgery (appendectomy) during Thanksgiving weekend this year. She was out of school for two weeks but it took a good twelve weeks for her to make a full recovery (minor complications). She would struggle through school, come home and sleep for three hours. The day she got back, her math teacher made her take a test even though she hadn’t learned the material. She made up all of the missed work within a few weeks but it took a total of 12 weeks before she regained her strength and momentum…she went from As to Bs that term, brought everything up to A-/B+ the next term and finally recovered in the 4th term to where she was in the first term. SHe ended up with As and Bs as final grades which is significantly lower than where she was prior to her surgery. She missed her winter sport which had an impact on her spring sport. She may not even make the team next year.</p>
<p>So, no excuses here but it did have an impact. She carries a tough workload and she lost her momentum. It took a while to get it back but the timing hurt. We too have to figure out a way to talk about this on college apps. I think they have to talk about it in a supplemental essay and discuss what they learned from it…she too has to hit it out of the park this fall…and if a college isn’t going to accept her because she had a rough couple of terms, then so be it…it just isn’t the right place for her.</p>
<p>D1 is off to college this fall in a very competitve major…the application process was very difficult and the acceptance rate for her major was around 8%. D2 (surgery girl) has chosen to study a less competitive major and will have many more options.</p>
<p>I agree with others. This is a conversation for you and your son to have with his high school guidance counselor…not you (the parent) with the colleges.</p>
<p>And equally important for the first term marks this year to reflect what your son “usually” does in the grade department. </p>
<p>I hope this year is more settled for your family. My sympathies on your family’s multiple losses. Good to hear your wife is well.</p>
<p>I think this should be raised with the colleges, but I agree that the GC is the best person to do this. But if you don’t think the GC will be willing or able to explain this adequately, your son may need to refer to this in an essay.</p>
<p>Admissions officers are human–they will ask themselves, “I wonder why this kid’s grades dipped junior year.” This is an explanation, not an excuse.</p>
<p>In my past expereince, GCs are useless and not directly tied in to many admissions offices. In fact some of the worst advice we ever recieved was from a GC.</p>
<p>In most applications, there is a spot for a supplemetal essay that asks, Do you want to tell us anything else about yourself or about your high school, etc…it is basically an open invitation to discuss any anomolies on your transcript or applications.</p>
<p>GCs aren’t tied to admissions offices, but what they write in their Secondary School Report recommendations gets carefully scrutinized and considered.</p>
<p>^^This, of course, totally depends on your GC. Ours was fantastic and sent out amazing letters to support our kids. She’d collect information from teachers, the student, and us to form a really complete of that student.</p>
<p>You can add this information at the end of the application, where it asks “for more information”, but I always think that’s where people who write excuses write something. (It’s also where you could list awards or include a resume). Or your son could write his whole important “college essay” about these experiences (turning it in a way that shows his strengths). Or one of the people who’ll write a recommendation could mention it briefly, again to show his strength as he worked through hard times, yet still achieved a decent grade.</p>
<p>I know for us, the GC would definitely mention it.</p>
<p>It may not help to explain the extenuating circumstances, but it won’t hurt either. You can go through your kid’s guidance counselor, but if it was me I’d just have my kid write a letter and send it to admissions. I don’t put much stock in guidance counselors for this kind of thing.</p>
<p>I also think it’s silly to deliberate over whether it’s an excuse or an explanation. Different people reading it will have different opinions about that, but it’s not like you’re doing anything other than filling out the picture of a very challenging year. I totally agree with Chedva as to the tone to take in it – make it positive.</p>
<p>Wow - I’m surprised at the advice you’ve received. Absolutely explain the circumstances. There is a place on the common app for the kid to explain any extenuating circumstances in his grades. The GC should also be advised about this so he/she can say something about it. Your son has shown his resiliance in not letting his grades drop too much. I would say a great-grandmother’s death is not too unexpected but if he was particularly close to her it would still be quite a blow - but to have your mother in a life threatening situation - that’s big. Talk to the GC, make sure they understand the brevity and make sure it is mentioned. Make sure your son explains it in his application.</p>
<p>Not all GCs are useless.
Agree, it is best from the GC- and also sometimes mentioned by the teachers who write LoRs. In the “addl info” section, if he notes anything, it should show strengths, not simply serve as an explanation. Eg, though I had to drop out of X, I am now back and seving as vp.</p>
<p>I agree with those who suggest using the “additional info” question. That’s one of the things it’s for. I think it’s important for the admissions people to hear from the student directly, rather than filtering through the guidance counselor - especially when you don’t know what information they’ll include or what tone they will use. I don’t think the student should feel apologetic about the grade dip, or feel that they have to talk about lessons learned. Your child had a really difficult set of experiences, and a lot of their attention was necessarily elsewhere during that time.</p>
<p>^the GC is assumed to be a legit reporter. As an educator, he/she also should know the tone to use, etc. The student should not feel apologetic- but how this is handled best often depends on the college list. The more competitive a school’s admissions is or the more a school is a reach, the trickier it can be. Sorry. Adcoms want to like a kid and they want explanations- but one of the things they look at, when reviewing, is how a kid tackles challenges or hurdles and how he springs back.</p>