<p>This essay I wrote on paper, then typed it up. My previous esssay I typed up from the beginning. Thanks for your comments ahead of time. </p>
<p>Prompt: What are your thoughts on the idea that television as turned out to isolate people instead of bringing them together?</p>
<pre><code>Great advances in technology at first glance look beneficial and positive. But as time passes, people adopt to this new technology and change their habits. One such example is the television. This marvelous box as it was referred to when it first came out has isolated people instead of bringing them together.
The term couch potato is a new term that describes a person who sits around all day watching television and doing practically nothing else. These people isolate themselves from society and even their own families. Since the habit came about with the introduction of the television, this habit has taken away the idea that watching television could be a communal affair.
Just a few generations ago kids used to play outside with their friends most of the time. This occurred mostly because there was no such thing called a television. But when such a thing was invented, kids started to spend less time playing with their friends and more time watching television individually. Even if a kid had his friends over to watch television, this only succeeded in temporarily bringing people together as opposed to creating a bond between these people.
Based on my own experience, television has isolated me from my community rather than bringing me closer to my community. I remember one summer, I was in elementary school and I just came home from swimming in a pool with my friends. Instead of all of us doing something else as a group, we each went to our own homes to watch television. We discovered a new cartoon on television called Pokemon. So instead of hanging out together the next day, each of us stayed home to watch the show. As the days passed, we grew farther apart until one day we did not hang out anymore.
Couch potatoes, and the way people spend their leisure time are both byproducts of television. More and more people are being entranced into watching this marvelous box that they forget what is important in life, friends and other people. As we get sucked into this other world, we leave reality. Once we leave reality it is hard to come back. Reality is life in the human form and one that you can converse with as opposed to one that you watch on television. As the world changes, our definitions change, so thus in the future who knows what the term human form would mean, the flesh or what is seen in television.
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<p>Here is the essay again but with lines in between each paragraph to make it easier to read. </p>
<p>Prompt: What are your thoughts on the idea that television as turned out to isolate people instead of bringing them together?</p>
<pre><code>Great advances in technology at first glance look beneficial and positive. But as time passes, people adopt to this new technology and change their habits. One such example is the television. This “marvelous box” as it was referred to when it first came out has isolated people instead of bringing them together.
The term “couch potato” is a new term that describes a person who sits around all day watching television and doing practically nothing else. These people isolate themselves from society and even their own families. Since the habit came about with the introduction of the television, this habit has taken away the idea that watching television could be a “communal affair.”
Just a few generations ago kids used to play outside with their friends most of the time. This occurred mostly because there was no such thing called a “television.” But when such a thing was invented, kids started to spend less time playing with their friends and more time watching television individually. Even if a kid had his friends over to watch television, this only succeeded in temporarily bringing people together as opposed to creating a bond between these people.
Based on my own experience, television has isolated me from my community rather than bringing me closer to my community. I remember one summer, I was in elementary school and I just came home from swimming in a pool with my friends. Instead of all of us doing something else as a group, we each went to our own homes to watch television. We discovered a new cartoon on television called “Pokemon.” So instead of hanging out together the next day, each of us stayed home to watch the show. As the days passed, we grew farther apart until one day we did not hang out anymore.
Couch potatoes, and the way people spend their leisure time are both byproducts of television. More and more people are being entranced into watching this “marvelous box” that they forget what is important in life, friends and other people. As we get sucked into this “other world,” we leave reality. Once we leave reality it is hard to come back. Reality is life in the human form and one that you can converse with as opposed to one that you watch on television. As the world changes, our definitions change, so thus in the future who knows what the term “human form” would mean, the flesh or what is seen in television.
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<p>5- an adequate presentation of examples (well essential one example, spanning 3 paragraphs), some grammar errors, a little too informal for my taste.</p>