Grade my SAT Writing Essay plz!

Test Preparation
1

<p>I don't know where to get this graded, and what I should do in the future to find out where I am, so I'll just post this online for now. Can anyone grade it for me(2-12)?? Thanks.</p>

<p>Consider the following statement and assignment. Then write the essay as directed.</p>

<p>"The ends always justify the means."
Assignment: Choose one example from personal experience, current events, or history, literature, or any other discipline and use this example to write an essay in which you agree or disagree with the statement above. Your essay should be specific.</p>

<p>The results of an event or series of events is often inconsequential compared to the actual process that produced those results. This is contrary to the view that “the ends always justify the means.” An example of how this view is incorrect is easily seen in Adolf Hitler’s reign in Germany during the twentieth century. Although the despot pulled his country out of depression and made it a world power, he killed many innocent Jews along the way and devastated the people of his own and other countries alike.</p>

<p>During the early 1900s, Germany, like much of the rest of the world, was going through a depression. In fact, the depression hit Germany so hard that the German mark, the nation’s currency, was worth thousands times less than it is currently. Hitler, as a political leader during this time and eventual chancellor and dictator of Germany, pulled the country out of depression, and, through economic savvy and military conquest, made Germany a world power by the early 1940s. Clearly, the fruits of Hitler’s reign were sweet indeed, but the means by which the tyrant achieved these results were dispicable.</p>

<p>In pulling the country out of depression and starting the Third Reich, Hitler harmed many people of the world and committed many crimes against humanity. As many know, Hitler led the Holocaust, a period of time in which Hitler killed millions of Jews simply because he believed they were a detriment to the world. Furthermore, countries such as Poland and even Hitler’s native Austria were devastated by his military attacks that caused them to submit to German supremacy.</p>

<p>Few would agree to the fact that Hitler’s means of killing millions of innocent civilians and trampling other countries are justifiable by Hitler’s removing of Germany from depression and placing it among the world’s most prosperous countries. Here, we see that although the ends are good and pure, the means can hardly be thought of as such. Clearly, then, as is demonstrated by Adolf Hitler’s reign in Germany, the ends do not always justify the means.</p>

2

<p>I'd give it at least a 10, maybe higher. The two things I noticed were that you didn't mention Machiavelli (I mean, I doubt they'd expect you to, but I certainly would have) and one error: Germany no longer uses the Mark; it's switched to the Euro. </p>

<p>It also seems a little too analytical. But it's good.</p>

3

<p>I disagree with some of your logic, but I don't think SATII graders care. Anyway, based solely on your writing ability, I would give it a 10.</p>

4

<p>i disagree with the logic too o.O, or rather, your assertion that getting rid of Jews (who, as I learned it, formed much of the intellectual/professional class) was a means by which Hitler pulled Germany out of the depression (which is also highly questionable, again, as I learned it) but unlike kinetic, I do think SAT II graders care. Isn't there some mark given for logic or something like that? Grammar slips and spelling mistakes take it to a 9, i think.</p>

5

<p>I think you might want to change the first paragraph... Reading the first paragraph is almost like reading the entire essay (it's pretty repetitive). Good essay though.</p>

6

<p>I do not think SAT II graders care much for validity, if the essay as a whole makes a valid argument, as he did.</p>

<p>You should not have develop your essay in your introductory paragraph. It is only supposed to lead into your essay, which yours does; however your essay, I think, goes a little too far. This will not make you lose many points, if any at all. I think your essay will score a 10-12. Keep in mind though, that grades for essays can sometimes be very random.</p>

<p>Overall, you stated your argument clearly and succinctly. Readers grade essays holistically, so they won't pick up on minutiae or small grammatical errors. As it says on the grading rubric published by ETS, essays do not have to be grammatically spotless to score a 12.</p>