Grades are in and it's not good

<p>My s and youngest of four children got his spring 12 grades in ceramic engineering and they are low: an A, two Bs, three Cs and a D in physics, the foothold of engineering. He's a mess, we're shocked but not surprised as he shared that physics was very, very tough for him. His overall gpa is a 2.33. His scholarship is gone putting us in a financial quandary as to which way to go. Planning on a good, heart to heart with him as he has the ability to brush off most challenges with a " it's good" when apparently, this was not the case. </p>

<p>We've struggled with this for two days but now it's time to face the music: </p>

<p>Freshman year and this is the best he can do in an extremely challenging field. Do we pull the plug, look into to trade schools/cc and proceed? Or do we do the " work hard, get help, work harder, get more help" speech and push him on? I have never been in such a spot with any of the other kids and they all pulled 3.5/4 through their college years. His biggest fear is the backlash they will give him, never mind mom and dad ( they are all considerably older than he and he's always been all of the family's "baby" to spoil. That alone may explain his predicament!)</p>

<p>Any thoughts would be appreciated. I'm the mom that sometimes thinks long about a situation and than jumps way too far to correct it. Dad's just mulling over it all still. Son is tiptoeing around us and my heart is breaking because I know he tried. He did have a long term gf break up in the first month he was on campus and then he came down with mono after Christmas break so he has had some added stressors this year. The question remains: where do we go now?</p>

<p>Thanks for any thoughts!</p>

<p>A mom</p>

<p>A few questions…

  • Can you afford for him to go back without the scholarship? If you can’t then obviously going back isn’t an option.
  • Is your S still passionate about pursuing a ceramic engineering degree? If not then what can he change to at the school he’s going to?</p>

<p>As far as we can tell our S is doing fine (not stellar) and he’s still passionate about his major (Biology) so I consider us fortunate. As an engineer though I saw my fair share of fellow students switch majors because they just couldn’t connect or handle the course load. I do NOT see that as a weakness, just means that engineering isn’t for them. Our S would not do well in an engineering major but he loves the Bio stuff (which I would not have had the interest or ability in).</p>

<p>Edit: Just saw the post above mine and that all sounds like good advice. Will have to remember that if things don’t go well in the future…</p>

<p>Just remember that freshman year is often the toughest. I was in an extremely difficult field as well and took all the weed-out courses with the engineers; I too struggled with some of those early courses like physics. My parents also thought I was trying, when in reality I did nothing, and spent my entire time partying. </p>

<p>As the years went on I saw great improvement- hopefully your S will too.</p>

<p>Also, I would think that the break-up and mono were probably significant factors.</p>

<p>don’t over-react. His grades are fine; it’s physics that did him in. Depending on what the other courses were he just may have been suffering from overload and an inability to pick the right courses to balance out the workload, get tutoring, etc.</p>

<p>Did he walk in with a strong foundation in physics and math? If not, he may be behind the 8 ball trying to do college level physics with kids who could be a year ahead of him in prep.</p>

<p>Has he met with his adviser yet? That’s the first step. The parents aren’t in a position to know what the next step is until the university weighs in. </p>

<p>Hugs. Don’t panic. And if it were me, I’d keep the other siblings far away from this. Bad enough your S’s confidence is shaken without it becoming the talk of the family. None of their business. Let him figure out a plan without having the big sibs tell him he should be in community college.</p>

<p>Seven classes? Is that typical these days?</p>

<p>I don’t know that I’d pull the plug on college, but maybe reconsider the major. It seems to me the main problem may be the Physics requirement. Remove that anchor and the rest of the grades may float up. </p>

<p>Just a thought.</p>

<p>Can he retake physics this summer somewhere just to get a better grasp on the concepts for the future???</p>

<p>If his passion and interest is still in Engineering, I say problem solve together how he can/ is willing to make changes for this second year.</p>

<p>Are you sure the scholarship is gone? Most schools put a kid on academic probation for a semester or two to give them an opportunity to bring their grades up.</p>

<p>I can also tell you engineering is tough, particularly the first couple of semesters when you’re taking all of the core courses, which are not necessarily subjects that you’re interested in or good at. (I started out in Arts & Sciences with several semesters of 4.0. Transferred into the Engineering school and <em>man</em> did my grades take a tumble. OTOH, they came back up about two years in, once I’d really started on my major.)</p>

<p>First of all, other than the Physics grade, I think he’s doing OK. Second of all, why is he taking 7 classes? When I went to college they did not allow more than 5 (4 was the norm and you had to move heaven and earth to get permission for 6).</p>

<p>DD had several friends in engineering who failed a class along the way, had to retake it, but all are now employed in their field.</p>

<p>Agree with having your son talking to the advisor to see what his options are - can he retake the physics?</p>

<p>I’m guessing that’s not seven hard core classes. Could be a PE, music, etc.</p>

<p>

</p>

<p>sage advice.</p>

<p>Good luck. Have him talk to his advisor to start figuring out where he “stands.”</p>

<p>Do something nice for yourself, today, and give yourself a bit of a break.</p>

<p>Wow thanks folks! Great thoughts! So far we have talked of tutoring this summer, rethinking the type of engineering, contacting his advisor and also, mum on the grades with the siblings! The poor kid has broke down twice on us and he needs no more pressure from the “good intentions” … His toughest critic is a sister who flew through school (I recall a hysterical late night call about an A- in her senior year; the lowest grade she had ever recieved) so I’m going to "enlighten"her before he sees her next. </p>

<p>The school did state that there’s a possibility of more aid to compensate the scholarship loss a bit but in the big scope of life, the money is less of a concern at this point than what direction son should take. </p>

<p>Anyone have a crystal ball I could borrow? (:</p>

<p>

</p>

<p>After my son earned a 2.3 GPA his first semester, I assumed that his scholarship was gone. The sweet folks on CC talked me down, I called the school and the scholarship was not gone. He actually was given two semesters to bring it up, as long as he made progress the next semester.</p>

<p>Hugs. So many of us have been there.</p>

<p>What math and physics did he take in HS? You don’t need to bail on engineering until you have a better handle on what went wrong.</p>

<p>and agree with the other posters- why such a heavy academic load? Freshman year is tough enough.</p>

<p>When I was in engineering, 6 classes a semester was the norm, with 5 of them science and math type classes, and it was a lot of work! Seven seems too much. The summer to regroup and decide if he wants to stick with it sounds like a good idea. I remember I had the option to take a class pass/fail, and I used it on first semester physics.</p>

<p>Time to thank your lucky stars for the elder high grade earners, and time for them to learn some humility IMO. </p>

<p>There are several online free physics courses he can self study to get caught up on physics, and otherwise his grades are FINE for engineering. He just has to hang in there, and the family needs to realize that grades in engineering are much lower, on average, than in many other majors. Hang in there with him!</p>

<p>I just want to add one thought. When you study engineering,math, physics, etc. you are training your mind to think in new ways. It is a process, and one D does not indicate that he can not succeed in the future.</p>

<p>This sounds somewhat familiar - what was his background in physics before this year? My brother, also an engineering major, failed Calc I his freshman year. FAILED the first math course for his major! This was largely due to the fact that we graduated from a very small, rural high school that offered math only up to Algebra II - and the rest of the kids in his calc class had already taken calc in high school. He was completely lost and nearly quit the program.</p>

<p>To his credit, he picked himself up, got a tutor, and retook the class - got an A and effectively erased the F from his transcript. He later graduated with a BS in Nuclear Engineering and MS in Mechanical Engineering, and he’s held high paying positions at various companies since then - he’s currently working with green technology for an environmental company and making more than twice what I make!</p>

<p>If Physics was just a stumbling block and you think he’s smart enough to handle the program, he shouldn’t give up engineering - UNLESS it means you’ll need to take out substantive loans in order for him to return. Talk to the scholarship people and find out if he can return on a probationary basis; otherwise, he might need to go the CC route until he can bring up his GPA and reapply to another program.</p>

<p>Ok now I really feeling bad for S. I’m making an assumption here but do advisors not oversee what students, especially freshmen, take on as a workload? His classes this semester were: chem2, calc2, physics1, computer aided engineering, two explorations in engineering: glass and ceramic, and an undergrad seminar. </p>

<p>Is this an inordinately high workload? Our older children did not refer to us for their class scheduling and husband and I are not college alumni ourselves.</p>