<p>Thankfully, the first month at BS corrects that problem for most kids. Quickly, too!! :)</p>
<p>^^^ could be the encrypted sub-set of the ARTSY-FARTSY group</p>
<p>call me when it’s safe to read CC again ~O) </p>
<p>^^Teenage naivete and bravado only partially explain some of the puzzling comments. A very important decision is about to made by someone with a very incomplete understanding of their situation. How they got this far in the process is a mystery to me. There must be more than meets eye.</p>
<p>Sharpener: You underscore something I’ve been thinking since M10…how this cycle it feel like so many kids who have ostensibly been admitted to some super selective schools know so little about the schools!</p>
<p>@squashisawesome, “Prestige” doesn’t reach too far out of its own circles. Case in point: I’m a well-educated American woman in my 50s. I’ve lived a lot of places, met a lot of people, read a lot of books. When we started looking into boarding schools, yes, I had heard of Exeter and Andover but had only the haziest idea where they were and whether they were separate schools (because of “Phillips”). I had heard of a few other schools but had no idea of their relative “prestige” status. And I’m in the minority for having even known this much. </p>
<p>Besides, once you go to college, no one will care where you went to high school except others who went to that school and feel nostalgia for it. And once you are launched in the world, it will not matter all that much where you went to college. Some names will look better on your resume or sound better at a cocktail party, but you will still have to prove yourself AND you have the opportunity to prove yourself no matter what college name is on your resume.</p>
<p>I understand why parents with little knowledge about boarding schools start their process from the very well known names such as Andover and Exeter and stick to them. They may not have heard of prestige names like Deerfield and Groton. It is the part of their learning experience and should not be widely criticized. After all, many parents here would have started the similar way. That being said, I totally see the point that GMT made on acronym schools. And I believe there is no further need for adults here to keep on arguing with young kid who isn’t as experienced at this point. This place is for sharing experience and information in an attempt to help those less experienced better understand the BS environment, not for trying to argue who is right and who is wrong, especially with youngsters. </p>
<p>Last fall, when I began compiling my apply-to list, I had this conversation with my mom. </p>
<p>Mom: And I assume you’re going to apply to Andover and Exeter, right?
Me: Andover yes, Exeter no.
Mom: Why not?
Me: I don’t know.
Mom: I’m fine if you don’t apply, just give me one good reason.
<em>awkward silence</em></p>
<p>[I had assumed that Exeter is a math/science school while my focus is creative writing. I was wrong.]</p>
<p>Even though I was rejected, I learned a valuable lesson. Look at the options before deciding. </p>
<p>@stargirl3 Again, hoping you get off a waitlist somewhere, but for others who go through this process next year, I cannot stress enough that “fit” is important. What defines fit will vary by applicant. Many prep schools and universities will have a version of “Why X” as part of the app. In addition to knowing that, applicants need to be apple to articulate, to themselves, their parents, etc, “why not Y.” I have read so many posts along the lines of “I got into A, but rejected by E. Why?” Or vice versa. The atmosphere is very different at these two schools. It is, IMHO, the rare student that will fit into either. I was not that rare student so I applied to one over the other.</p>
<p>That said, the qualities that makes one a fit at A/E exists at other boarding schools, and one should seek them out and include then on the apply-to list. Those of us on CC often group schools by different acronyms that do not really exist, but when we go up the academic food chain, you will see countless “Chance me for the Ivies.” The Ivy League is an athletic conference. That’s it. I am always astounded by the applicant who feels that he will be equally happy in Hanover, NH or Morningside Heights.</p>
<p>I strongly feel that if an applicant does not build a school list, whether prep school or college, that is not cohesive in some way, that lack of cohesion will come out somewhere else in the application to the detriment of the applicant.</p>
<p>I (think I) understand fit. I honestly think I could fit anywhere I applied. </p>
<p>@skieurope</p>
<p>I totally agree with you. I have seen many top applicants apply to all IVY league schools without considering their fit. Each school requires different fit and that is mainly a function of ‘character’. Each applicant has his/her own character that will either help or deny them. I guess boarding schools should be somewhat similar.</p>
<p>Or in many cases, applicants (for both college and BS) fail to show their own character. It is a matter of either having no actual character or improper packaging of themselves. The former is one of the main reasons why the top applicants with perfect grades and scores sometimes get denied by the schools of their choice, while others with less impressive numbers are accepted. In short, fit and character play a much much bigger role on admission than we outside people may think. </p>
<p>Not meaning to burst any bubbles…as a parent who has just gone thru college apps with a student, there are actually very few colleges concerned with “fit.” Sure there are a couple of colleges in the grand scheme of things who ask, why X college? But really surprisingly, and frighteningly…few. Yup.</p>
<p>Most have just the 650 word essay and write about an EC that you got the most out of. A lot of emphasis is put on grades, SAT scores, recs and essays, and then ECs. But few want to know why you are a good fit for their school.</p>
<p>Pop, pop, pop…yes, the sound of bursting bubbles…</p>
<p>@stargirl13 My comments were not aimed at you (other than the I’m rooting for you). I have no doubt you had a clear strategy. It was more in general as a response to the title of the thread, and the countless X vs Y threads that pop up, when X is incredibly dissimilar to Y, especially when people have not seen the freaking school. Not that both X and Y are not good schools, but they will appeal to different people. </p>
<p>That said, I’m helping you avoid the awkward silence the next time your mother asks, whether it’s next year or when preparing for college :)</p>
<p>@skieurope No problem, I didn’t think they were. </p>
<p>(I kind of like awkward silences…)</p>
<p>
</p>
<p>What’s wrong with this? Let them try… and learn. Some people learn from other people’s mistakes, and some others have to learn from their own.</p>
<p>To be honest, I have made more than my fair share of un/mis-informed decisions in my life, and I’m afraid that I’m not done yet.</p>
<p>
And, even more impressively, he went to Exeter for prep school.</p>
<p>This is what I wrote in another thread (about Andover):
"My personal opinion is that Andover- despite its endearing reputation- might not necessarily be the right school for you/your child. First of all (and I am not trying to disparage anyone’s perception of Andover; I am simply trying to express the truths evident to me), its reputation was built upon its legacy and the history that has accumulated under its name. (By the way, numerous “less esteemed” schools have surpassed Andover in areas such as: SAT scores, number of Ivy school acceptances, etc, in case this type of thing matters to you.) What many fail to realize, unfortunately, is that attending a school that the Bushes graduated from may not necessarily guarantee you a stint in the presidency. Being an Andover grad may not necessarily grant you a spot at an Ivy, or even a happy future. It’s all about the BEST FIT.</p>
<p>Schools accept you based upon whether they believe you’re suitable for them or not. Sure, you might be the top tennis player in your state with a 99% SSAT score to boot- however (and often unfortunately), the impressiveness of those stats alone might not score you spots in these prestigious schools. They might choose a clarinetist with subpar academic scores over you if they lack clarinetists. Being waitlisted/rejected to any of these schools does NOT mean you are any lesser of a candidate than those who WERE accepted.</p>
<p>Returning to my point about the best fit, maybe going to a school as big as Andover might blight your potential. Maybe a smaller school would allow you to fulfill your dreams? Or maybe your true prowess might not be recognized in a school you were rejected at, but you would shine in a school you WERE accepted in? Don’t feel like it is the end of the world if you don’t get accepted by what you THOUGHT was “the school of your dreams”- because there’s a valid reason why you didn’t get accepted. …Maybe they didn’t appreciate you as much they did other candidates, so if you did attend you would just be lost in a school of more talented people; or maybe you needed full FA while they didn’t; or someone was a child of some famous politician and squeezed you out of an acceptance. My point is, don’t be sad about your waitlists/rejections. As @mrnephew stated earlier, LOVE THE SCHOOL THAT LOVES YOU."</p>
<p>Personally, I feel that it doesn’t matter which acronym your school falls in: it all revolves around whether that school is the best fit for you or not. That’s what matters in the end of the day.</p>
<p>We’re hardly what you’d call a focus group but when I see my kids and their cousins together during breaks and holidays, they have a true regard for all schools. Sure, they’ll tease each other about team standings or one up on things like school trips or AP courses, but it’s all in good fun. (Full disclosure: Rival school alums and kids have been known to take things to a whole different level. 
)</p>
<p>During spring break and summer, I see kids from all different boarding schools train together for crew at our boathouse and then compete against each other fall and spring. It’s fun to see them chat back and forth up to the start (like old home week) and then battle it out. I remember one parent observing four kids (in different school unis) watching races together onshore and finding the scene remarkable… until I told her they train and race in a club quad during the summer. I think it’s important to point out (once in awhile) how BS can be boiled down to a shared experience. Sometimes, the only thing that’s different is the location.</p>
<p>This is why I don’t put a lot of stock in prestige and tiers. Once students are actually living the BS life day in and day out, they’ll see that things (people tend to focus on here) really don’t matter so much. I think students/parents can enter BS with that mindset, but I doubt they’ll leave with it. Even when you’re an old alum, you’ll run into fellow alums from different schools throughout your life and it’s always the same: War stories and shared experience…</p>
<p>Something to look forward to. :)</p>
<p>@squashisawesome from the looks of your username it seems you love Squash! Did you see what @makennacompton wrote? Looks like Andover would be a great fit for you! Have you made a decision yet? </p>
<p>I think that despite the talk of “best” fit the decision is many times left to the prep schools. Unless an applicant has legacy, the choices for many kids may be limited. Wait another four years and you will see how college acceptances become such a random walk. Gone are the days when being accepted to one Ivie meant you were accepted to the other top schools. I think there may even be some gaming where some of these acronym schools do not accept students they think might be accepted at another acronym. Deerfield may want to improve their yield compared to Exeter,etc. As a parent who paid the $200K plus for a four year BS education, I did not look at the prestige because I had no family experience with BS. The second go around we went to 10 schools presentation and were more educated about just a few more schools. The 10 schools was not a comprehensive presentation and only serves to reinforce the idea of prestige. Really do not see the difference between Deerfield and Andover in terms of the superficial “prestige” category. Hope this kid gets to have a voice in the decision and is able to make a choice based on his feeling of where he/she fits best.</p>
<p>Just curious which CCer devised the HADES acronym and how long has it been in use? Did the same poster come up with the HYPMS acronym?</p>