I’d rate W&M, UVA, and Scripps (as part of the Claremont Colleges) as being above JMU (even with Honors), Chapman, and Loyola Marymount. If you are in Virginia now, it could be that she could have in-state tuition for the duration (but you would have to check), which could make the Virginia publics less expensive. On the flip side, obviously, she’d be far away.
I doubt that there would be too much difference between UVA, W&M, and Scripps (with the computer science classes at Harvey Mudd, a pretty hard-core school) in terms of difficulty and intensity. There was a survey in Virginia papers a short while back on time spent studying per week at Virginia colleges. W&M was one hour more per week than UVA, and a couple hours less than Washington and Lee. That is fairly insignificant in my view. Average GPAs are approximately the same for W&M and UVA graduates.
Having your daughter at the same school (UVA) as your son would seem to be a plus as it might be easier to check up on them and easier to organize travel and visits.
Scripps is fairly unique as it is part of Claremont Colleges. They are adjacent and are close to the size of W&M combined. UVA as you know is significantly larger, but not huge.
You have some good choices. Good luck.