I am currently on a study abroad program in Africa until February and I am not having a very good time. From when the plane first landed I have spiraled into a deep depression and I have no idea how to get out of it, and have strongly considered going home. However, if I go home I will need to refund the college and will not get any credits so I’m basically here marinating in sadness.
I am an extremely extroverted and independent person, and that’s why I decided to come here instead of Europe, I wanted to experience new things. However, making friends on this program is extremely difficult since we have a 6pm curfew and I need to take classes with people on my program (basically meaning it’s me and the same 3 people in a small room learning from the same professor from 9-4pm every weekday).
Most advice given on how to fix a bad study abroad experience is to, “go out and experience things, party until 6am, really immerse yourself”, but that’s kind of impossible for me to do here.
I’m staying with a host family but the mom works until very late and both of my sisters are not the most social. I’ve never been one to quit but I can feel myself spiraling into a deep sadness that I don’t know if the experience is worth it. Especially because “the experience” is me going to school and coming home to watch Netflix everyday. I’m trying to stay positive but I really am lost. Need advice ASAP.
Can you volunteer at a local public school? Most classes are over rolled so the director might be willing to give you a chance. This way you could connect with children and teachers. Obviously if you’re allowed to volunteer, request and interview znd be ready to explain what you can reach, how etc, treat this as a relatively job interview even if it’s a volunteer position.
Do you have a 6pm curfew because of safety issues? Are these new or did you know about them before going? Or is the curfew negotiable?
“From when the plane landed…” is very telling. You seem to have immediately disliked the place you are in, and it all went downhill. I think you are looking at this the wrong way. This is a few short months. You’ll be leaving soon enough. Knowing how to be “on your own” even though you really aren’t is a good life skill. Start talking more with your classmates, and get to know them more. You’re all in this together. Ask if you can visit another student on the program. That doesn’t seem unreasonable. Can’t you hang out with the other people in the class on the weekend?
So you endure a few sucky months. It’s a good way to learn how to keep yourself mentally fit. Make the most of the situation. Instead of just watching Netflix, read the books you’ve been always wanting to read. Teach yourself a foreign language, and sign up for a program where you can talk to others via Skype in the foreign language of choice. What about the family you live with? You say they aren’t sociable, but maybe you can engage them more. Ask if they want to play a card game, or watch one of your Netflix movies. I am guessing they speak English, but ask to learn some of the local lingo. Ask one of them to take you on a walking tour of the area.
Instead of allowing yourself to become depressed over a temporary and relatively short situation, teach yourself to endure, one day at a time. I hope you don’t think I’m being flippant, but things could be much worse. Even if you aren’t necessarily having a great time, you are very lucky to be in a position to experience a different culture and get an education at the same time. You have a roof over your head and food to eat, and there is a light at the end of this particular tunnel. And of course, if there is access to counseling services, use them. I think you will be fine, but it’s time to stop feeling sorry for yourself and make the most out of something that clearly didn’t meet your expectations.