<p>
</p>
<p>I don’t think “everyone else” does it. In fact, I know absolutely no one who does it. Yes some essays have a lot more parental input than my D would allow, but writing an essay with no input from the child? I just can’t believe it.</p>
<p>I’m not shocked, not even surprised. It’s common enough that admissions officers even have an acronym for an essay they can tell was written by a parent: WBD (Written By Dad) or some such thing. </p>
<p>A friend recently confessed to me she helped write her child’s college essay, as well as high school and college assignments. She felt if she didn’t help, her child would pay too high a price.</p>
<p>Now my friend wonders if due to her assistance, her child is in over her head at the competitive college to which she was admitted.</p>
<p>I’m sure it happens. I find it very sad that some parents have so many insecurities about their offspring.</p>
<p>I’m not so sure that adcoms can tell if a parent wrote the essay. And hope they don’t misjudge kids either! My S had a very sophisticated, adult style to his writing. Several times he won essay contests, and when the essay was published in the paper, parents didn’t believe he had written it himself. They asked me if I had written it. People judge the work based on what their own child could do, but there are brilliant, well-read students who are the kind who apply to the top schools where essays are very important. Besides, these parents aren’t stupid either; they’ll use teenage word choices to make it seem written by their student or have the student edit it, a reverse of the regualar process.</p>
<p>I’m allowed to proof for typo’s, but he doesn’t trust me for spelling/grammar! ;)</p>
<p>
I’m not at all sure, either. I don’t think it’s limited to parents writing the essays, either. Aren’t there services that will do this for a fee?</p>
<p>My son also had a sophisticated style of writing. When he went to a scholarship interview at one school, they had an essay of his there and told him that he wrote in a more sophisticated manner than most 18 year-olds. (He never entered any essay contests, though.)</p>
<p>I would never write my children’s essays. So far (three down and two to go), I have kept a copy of each one–it’s the final item in the childhood “baby box,” one last opportunity to hear their unique, still youthful voices before they fly the coop.</p>
<p>I’m a bit worried about this…I’ve also been recognized for writing, and (I think, anyway) I have a more sophisticated writing style (verging on esoteric sometimes). Do you think adcoms might think my essays are written by an adult and count that against me?</p>
<p>I have a hunch that Ad Comms are good at ferreting out if the whole application package hangs together. I’ll use my S as an example. He’s very strong in the math/science arena, and it shows all over his application, from class selection to EC activities. While his package will include a strong letter from his AP English teacher, she did not indicate he was some kind of writing god (in fact, she wrote about how diplomatic he was in her rhetoric class.) So, if he turned in “publishable prose” I would expect an eyebrow to be raised.</p>
<p>We’ve given him small doses of editorial commentary on HIS essay writing, as well as enlisted his aunt, the attorney, for some higher level overview. But that is it. His voice comes through clearly.</p>
<p>
</p>
<p>Well, that answers this one:
</p>
<p>S2 tends to run wordy (he talks through what he wants to say and then writes that down). He has asked me “what should I edit?” but I am adamant at this stage about letting HIM further develop that skill. I think he’d like more help than I’m willing to give. I have encouraged him to talk to his brother, who has been through this process. </p>
<p>S2 and I have talked about generic ways to develop hooks and transitions, ways to tighten phrasing, whether an essay tells instead of shows, etc. Proofing is not an issue; both kids got the grammar/spelling gene. At the end of the day, it’s gotta be his voice and his words, though. </p>
<p>English teachers at his school do not review essays.</p>
<p>He had a fourteen word phrase to describe something on one school assignment and I showed him how two words could say the same thing.</p>
<p>I don’t know anyone who has written his or her child’s essay, but I know a lot of prodding, hair-pulling and gnashing of teeth is happening all around.</p>
<p>For S1, I suggested 3 topics, he wrote a paragraph on each to get started, and then it became obvious what the best topic would be. He took it from there. The main part of the essay was really nicely done, but the final paragraph was very weak (in my opinion). He thought it was fine, so it stayed.</p>
<p>For S2, he came up with 1 topic and wrote a quick draft that I thought captured his personality perfectly. I suggested a couple of minor changes, which he made and judged good enough to send off to an EA safety school that had a 10/15 deadline. After re-reading the essay I noticed a couple of typos - oh well! He’s got time to refine the essay for the rest of his schools. His final paragraph is also weak in my view. He’s more open to improving it than S1 was.</p>
<p>
</p>
<p>LOL, I have to agree with this.</p>
<p>D is a good writer, has written her own essays, solicited feedback from parents, teachers, strangers, and gone through several revisions. I think they are pretty good.</p>
<p>For one of her colleges, the word limit is 250 words. Since her essays are all about 500-700 words long she clearly has some work to do to shorten them for this one college. I understand that it is a painful task to slash away major chunks of a carefully crafted essay, but it is a job that needs to be done. She has kept putting off this job, and I have been tempted to do it for her. I would simply start with her essays, cut out parts that I thought were dispensable, get the word count down, and then give the abbreviated essay back to her to use as she pleases. </p>
<p>I won’t do it, but I have been tempted.</p>
<p>After son was rejected from his ED school… there were some on CC who said that it could have come down to his essay. Granted, they hadn’t read the essay and the school itself could probably come up with at least two solid classes from the thousands who apply. Still, he did somewhat refine his common application essay. But then too… he had had another two months of reflecting. I agreed it was a much stronger ending the second time around.</p>
<p>As for the hair-pulling thing: I admit I did a lot more of this with oldest child. For this one who is now a freshman happily adjusted to college, it was more the attitude that if he wanted in to college, it was his essay or essays to write. </p>
<p>However, that doesn’t mean I didn’t try to keep things manageable and my job was more secretarial than anything else. I went through all the other supplemental applications and made a one sheet list of all the additional essays he needed to write. Despite their different phrasing, and a couple dinner time conversations of brainstorming ways he could bring to light things not obvious in the rest of his application, it became clear that he could use his time most efficiently by writing maybe two solid essays and then tweaking them to fit the specific questions at hand. </p>
<p>I tried to encourage him to write some of these while waiting for the ED decision, however, it was clear that his heart was not in it yet and so it was best to not push. But I do know that the questions were ruminating in his brain so that by the time he got the “no go” decision - and a day to mourn - , he was more than ready to write and rewrite. </p>
<p>Sometimes the process of writing means a lot of not writing. From my own personal process, I know that just because there aren’t words on a page doesn’t mean there isn’t a lot of writing taking place.</p>
<p>Vicarious: A GREAT tool with microsoft word is Auto-Summarize (aptly listed under tools on the toolbar.) I have had my kids use for a couple of reasons: to see if what they are trying to say is really what is coming across as the main points and to get their word down count in a big way. My kids have a rather large Sophomore paper they need to write where they also have to write an abstract. It’s a nice place to start.</p>
<p>As you know, 250 words isn’t very many but if she autosummarizes she might easily see what can go without being missed OR how she’s missed out on making the point she had hoped to. My son had to do this as I referred to above for a few short answers… he basically autosummarized and then edited from there to polish it up.</p>
<p>I don’t think every parent written essay is obvious. My son’s essay complains about me dawdling through museums, which I suspect makes it sound more like a kid, but I expect there’s some devious parent out there who might put that in.</p>
<p>My older son struggled to make his essays long enough!</p>
<p>Modadunn: I had never used that tool. I tried it out, it is amazing! I thank you profusely. Funny how it is not unethical to use the tools within the word processing program but if parents do it then it is unethical!</p>
<p>(Note: This post could have been shortened by using the autosummarize tool to “Thank you!” 
).</p>
<p>Actually writing the essay may not be the norm, but at a northeastern private HS that targets the top schools they set up a panel of teachers that begin reviewing essays over the summer. The essay is critiqued and sent back to the student for revision or at times a rewrite on a different topic. This process iterates until the panel believes the essays are just right for the first choice schools. It may not be writing it for the student, but it is not what I believe the colleges are after. Then again, maybe they are given the success of this school in its admissions placement. I have written about it before. They begin planning ECs, etc. for the student freshman year and manage the entire process from day one in order to get the kids into top Ivy’s etc., and it works.</p>
<p>I just hope S will let me read his essay. Writing? Never.</p>