Having second thoughst about Richmond

<p>Richmond has always been son's first choice. He was very happy when he got his likely letter.</p>

<p>Now that he has gotten acceptances from other colleges, and it won't be long before we have to make that final decision, I started researching more about Richmond and I am starting to have misgivings.</p>

<p>I have read articles and student reviews about racism and intolerance in the school. My son is not only a minority but he is also gay. As a mother, I cannot help but feel apprehensive about how he will be treated in this college. He will be 3000 miles away from home if he does decide to enroll in Richmond. He will be too far away from home for me to keep an eye on him. I want him to have a good education and I have no doubt UR will give him that but I also want him to be happy and accepted by the people around him.</p>

<p>This is an example of an article which I saw.</p>

<p>Hate</a> crimes: Ignorance is not bliss | University of Richmond Collegian ? University of Richmond News</p>

<p>Can any Richmond parent or student address this issue and perhaps give me some words of assurance that this is just an isolated incident?</p>

<p>My D is waiting to hear from Univ of Richmond and I’m hoping that this article reflects the behavior of a very small sample of students. We’re from the west coast and find the story offensive, and my D would likely be one of the first people to stick up for anyone picked on. In the year 2011, I’m hoping people will post that this is not generally true and that it’s a few bad apples like you’ll find on any campus. Perhaps current students will post. Good luck and all the best as your son decides. Where else is he considering?</p>

<p>liliput, a pretty good friend of mine came out after graduation from UR. I’d be more than happy to put you or your son in touch with him, so that he could share his experiences. While it won’t be the exact situation (since your son is openly gay), it could hopefully make you and/or him more comfortable with UR.</p>

<p>The LBGQT community at UR has become more prominent on campus the last couple of years. This wasn’t the case while I was there.</p>

<p>I’m a current MBA (as well as undergrad alum), so I have access to the student directory. I’d be more than happy to also try to put you in touch with current students if you PM me.</p>

<p>UR will no doubt offer the best education.But since I’m also an int’l applicant, I cannot shed more light on this issue… can anyone inside UR give some advice to me?</p>

<p>Liliput, since he is thinking about going 3,000 miles away, I assume your son spent time on the campus, attended classes, visited, stayed overnight? I think you get a very realistic “feel” for the students when doing so. It is what our daughter did before enrolling there. Remember that article was one person’s story. There are 3,000 undergrads there. Our daughter has never once mentioned any of the above being an issue or a problem. It is a campus of bright, hard working kids, many of which are affluent (but not all), nicely dressed and mostly clean cut, with a northeast presence in spite of being in Virginia (we knew this coming in, we’re southerners!), with some wonderful traditions (like Ring Dance for Junior girls, a black tie event where fathers escort their daughters down the steps of the Jefferson Hotel); a strong Greek presence but one that is low key (meaning it is not a big deal if you don’t pledge, and if you do, there are no houses, so there is more mixing between greek and non greek than you would find at a large university) etc etc. There are so many opportunities for involvement. One of our daughter’s best friends did not pledge because she is actively involved in a theme house on campus and several other groups. The athletic facilities are fantastic and the kids there are generally really “fit”. Above all, it is a wonderful place to learn. The experience has made it worth every penny we’ve spent. If your son has not been to campus (I can’t imagine…) then by all means, before committing to four years, get on a plane and visit. Stay overnight. Go to classes. Meet people. He’ll know without a doubt if he feels it is the right place. Good luck.</p>

<p>Rather than speculate on what my UR Freshman daughter would say, I sent your post to her and asked for feedback. She said:</p>

<p>I personally haven’t seen anything like this on campus or heard of these incidents. I have some friends who are gay or who people assume to be gay, and they haven’t had any issues up to this point. I do believe those are isolated incidents, and if he finds a good group of friends, who know he’s gay and love him anyway, he’ll be fine. There are enough of us out there that will protect him, if some idiot tries something. I also believe that those things could happen on any college campus; it depends on the views of the individual students who are accepted. I think, unfortunately, anywhere you go, there will be someone who doesn’t like gays, who may act on it. It is still a controversial thing. As the article said, the majority don’t do these things and the minority need to go away. We have groups on campus for LGBTQ kids, and my impression, overall, is that the school as a whole is find with bring gay. Yes, there probably is the occasional drunk intolerant idiot, but I haven’t personally seen any of that behavior.</p>

<p>If he or his mom wants to talk to me, give them my email address.</p>

<p>I graduated last May and I remember all of those events. I spent a great deal of my time in the theatre department. When the doll hanging incident happened, every student involved in the department was called in for a meeting. Without exception, we were thoroughly disturbed. That incident began a campus-wide dialog about race and sexuality and tolerance that continues today. </p>

<p>Richmond as a whole struck me as a tolerant campus. As with any community, there are people that have a problem with certain races or certain sexualities, but it is not by any means representative of the majority of the students at UR.</p>

<p>As another poster discussed, a visit to the campus is certainly in order. My son spent several days at each of the two schools he was considering that were far away and that we knew little about. One went off his list after he could see how the fraternity system worked personally. He had gotten mixed stories about it, but really most kids did not feel it was a big deal. It was a enough of an issue for him that he did not want to go to that school. The other school was one where he loved the atmosphere more every minute he was there, and that became his first choice school. </p>

<p>The schools that were closer to us were more known to us in terms of atmosphere and we knew that there were not very many degrees of separation among many of the kids there and my son. But for the far away schools, that was not the case at all, so we did check them out much more carefully in terms of fit and feeling.</p>

<p>I can tell you in the last 20 years, any number of schools have had terrible incidents of intolerance, racism, homophobia , and some of those schools have been quite diverse with sizable minority populations and the incidents were not at all reflective of the schools. Just like some horrific crime can occur on a generally safe campus, such incidents can crop up at schools where this is not at all the norm.</p>

<p>Sadly, every school will have its share of drunken bullies. And they will be abusive for any reason–not just sexual orientation. And, of course, the same behavior continues on into adulthood and is present everywhere–not just on a college campus.</p>

<p>The only place that is truly safe for your son is in your home. But, he is ready to leave and go out into the world. You’ve taught him well and he will be strong and true when he faces adversity–in whatever form it comes.</p>

<p>Fortunately, a school like Richmond is filled with eager young people who are actively working to enrich their lives and to improve the world around them. I’ll bet he’ll love it there. Good luck.</p>

<p>The first article posted was appalling, this one is disturbing in that the writer of the article seems to embrace and celebrate his ignorance and insensitivity. </p>

<p>[Are</a> You Easily Offended? | University of Richmond Collegian ? University of Richmond News](<a href=“http://thecollegianur.com/2011/03/23/are-you-easily-offended/19004/]Are”>http://thecollegianur.com/2011/03/23/are-you-easily-offended/19004/)</p>

<p>nysmom:</p>

<p>I agree with your assessment of both articles. Ironically, though, my response to the second letter was somewhat positive.</p>

<p>When the letter writer asks people to stop…stop…stop…, it suggests that people are already challenging his views. Presumably those people are other UR students who state their objections to his jokes and opinions.</p>

<p>A univeristy needs to accommodate differing viewpoints. Similarly, a university needs people who stand up and challenge those opinions that are ignorant, intolerant, and hateful. From both the original article and from this letter, it is my impression that the students at UR are already active in that conversation.</p>

<p>It is also important to remember how many college students are still just wanting to be noticed. (I assume that is what prompts the wearing of salmon pink pants???). Anyway, when I look at the college newspapers from my previous schools (undergrad and grad), I see the same sorts of letters. Fortunately, these letters are not truly indicative of the general attitude at either of my schools. And, from the content of this writer’s letter, I suspect that his attitudes and opinions are not indicative of UR, either.</p>

<p>Having said all that, I acknowledge that my experience with UR is limited. I’m on CC because my son got a likely letter and I want to know more about UR (before spending all that money…). But, having spoken with UR grads and current students, my expriences have all been positive. Has anyone else on this thread had first-hand experience with anything problematic or objectionable?</p>

<p>One of my newfound hobbies as the father of a freshman is reading the updates on the “crime” log in the student newspaper. </p>

<p>[Police</a> Report: 03/24/11 | University of Richmond Collegian ? University of Richmond News](<a href=“http://thecollegianur.com/2011/03/24/police-report-03-24-11/19107/]Police”>http://thecollegianur.com/2011/03/24/police-report-03-24-11/19107/)</p>

<p>I think the number one crime on campus is stealing exit signs. There seem to be a few of those each week. There were some assaults early this year but the non-student suspects were caught and arrested. There was one assault that the police report stated “by an unknown assailant at an unknown time in an unknown location”. </p>

<p>There is an archive if you follow the link. Pick any report and I don’t think you are going to find any hate crimes. You will find a lot of alochol related incidents, a lot of people reporting minor damage to their cars, some cell phone thefts, oh and the exit signs.</p>

<p>Forceable rape?</p>

<p>Mango - I would never try to minimize a crime such as rape. I know zero about this particualr crime but can speculate that it was of the date rape variety. And I am not minimizing date rape. (I’m trying to tread lightly here). The link below shows crime statistics at UR for 2007-2009. I suspect that these compare very favorably to other schools. At the bottom of this page is hate crimes. Zero reported in the three years of the report. Three forceable sex offenses in three years.</p>

<p>[Annual</a> Campus Crime Statistics - Police Department - University of Richmond](<a href=“Crime Log Disclaimer - Police Department - University of Richmond”>Crime Log Disclaimer - Police Department - University of Richmond)</p>

<p>I am very comfortable with my 18 year old daughter roaming the campus. Call boxes are everywhere. Campus police can get to any call box in something like two minutes.</p>

<p>PAVenturer: Thanks for the added info. D is waiting to hear from UR and that was listed in that list as though it was “cat stuck in tree!” Glad another parent is checking these things out… thanks!</p>

<p>I graduated from UR in 2009 and I do remember those incidents mentioned in the posts on this forum. Personally, I think UR handled these terrible incidents well and used them as an opportunity to talk about racism and sexuality. Overall, UR is what you make it, I found a close knit group of friends, mostly international students. I felt the overall atmosphere is very respectful of minorities of all sorts. I do remember hearing about a LGBT group on campus and focused on shedding light on LGBT issues and promoting acceptance. In terms of safety, I transferred to from Smith College (a small all girls college in Massachusetts) and in part chose UR because I felt that its location and resources would provide a safe campus experience. During my three years there I did not have any issues and had to pull several all nighters in Boatwright (library) and then return to my dorm. In retrospect, I would recommend that anyone in general take safety percussion such as carrying pepper spray, begin alert, using buddy system, regardless of where they attend. </p>

<p>Also, I did not join a sorority because I never felt like a “sorority type” of girl, however, many sororities at UR seemed to promote academic excellence and were more of a service club. I recall that several people who graduated with high honors belonged to this one particular sorority (maybe a coincidence, maybe not). </p>

<p>As you can probably tell I enjoyed my time at UR and actually picked it over Vandy when I transferred my sophomore year. Another plus was no TAs!!! I had several friends that went to better known schools and had TAs their first two years!</p>

<p>At the Experience Richmond program this past weekend there was an “Ask a Spider” panel discussion. One of the members was openly gay - and he clearly had no problems or misgivings about being at Richmond. He’s head of the GLSA on campus… After observing him, and the interactions with other students on the panel, I’d say that the incidents you were referring to seemed isolated and not tolerated at Richmond.</p>

<p>[Police</a> Report: 04/14/11 | University of Richmond Collegian ? University of Richmond News](<a href=“http://thecollegianur.com/2011/04/14/police-report-041411/20155/]Police”>http://thecollegianur.com/2011/04/14/police-report-041411/20155/)</p>

<p>Read through the college newspaper to get a very general idea of the campus happenings.
Try to have your kid spend a night or two on campus during a typical weekend.<br>
Ask questions until you feel you’ve received complete and honest answers. Listen to the pros, but don’t dismiss the cons.</p>

<p>As with all colleges, what is perfect for one student, may not be for another. It’s very difficult to filter out all of the information presented from past students, current students, admission’s people, students unhappy with a school, students happy with a school, etc.</p>

<p>Good luck and I hope everyone going through this difficult decision time ends up at the college which meets their best “fit” criteria.</p>

<p>Sunny17 – I’d appreciate hearing why you left Smith for Richmond. I’m strongly considering Smith for next fall. Considered Richmond too but it’s no longer a top choice for me.</p>

<p>LACluster: I transferred from Smith to UR for several reasons. First, Smith did not offer my major (environmental studies, they only offered environmental science). Also, from the get go I really did not feel like Smith was a good fit but it was the best school I got into and was offered a substantial academic & service scholarship. Once I got to Smith it was definitely a culture shock and I really knew half way into my first semester that I was going to transfer. At that point I focused on getting good grades and making the most out of my classes. The classes and professors at Smith were top notch, however, the class discussions really left something to be desired (maybe this was just my experience). I felt like many of the students there were a bit jaded, but again could have just been my experience. Another factor was the town, I really did not like Northampton and thought it was too small for me. Lastly, I did not see the benefit of attending an all girls college. I know people argue that it helps some women feel like they can speak up in science and math courses but I personally never had issues about speaking up around males.</p>

<p>On the other hand, I met my best friend there who loved Smith and stayed all four years. For me it was a very personal decision based on academics (my major), campus atmosphere, the surrounding area, and the weather (brutal winters and I am from Florida). </p>

<p>I applied to UR and Vandy and got into both. I chose UR because it still had the small liberal arts backdrop that I did like about Smith. Also the campus and surrounding areas really appealed to me. I ended up living on campus two years and then lived off park avenue (near carry town) in Richmond. I went to DC often and there are great opportunities if your into politics. In comparison, UR’s curriculum and classes were just as challenging as at Smith. The major difference was the UR professors did at times somewhat coddle students in terms of class material. For example, I definitely had more quizzes and other smaller assignments in addition to term papers, finals. Whereas at Smith, typically had one term paper and a final which account for your entire semester grade. </p>

<p>Hope this helps! feel free to message me if you want more information/insight.</p>