Hello CC community, I need your help. Again. :)

Applying to College
1

<p>I am reposting this from the UMICH thread for maximum results, sorry. </p>

<p>Would any of you like to read the first 142 words of my supp essay in response to the prompt:</p>

<p>Essay #1 (Required for all applicants. Approximately 250 words.)</p>

<p>Everyone belongs to many different communities and/or groups defined by (among other things) shared geography, religion, ethnicity, income, cuisine, interest, race, ideology, or intellectual heritage. Choose one of the communities to which you belong, and describe that community and your place within it.</p>

<p>And then tell me where the heck I am going with this, I wrote it a while ago and have typed up like three endings that I ultimately ended up deleting, and now I am frustrated. It will not take long I promise. I just need a good bit of guidance here cause I am nearly to the pulling- my -hair -out stage with this thing.</p>

<p>Oh yeah, and of course feel free to tell me if this is even a good start in the first place, no point in finishing a bad essay.</p>

<p>Thank you all!</p>

2

<p>bump…</p>

3

<p>anybody at all? Please?</p>

<p>It is 142 words, so it will take under a minute-ish to read. :)</p>

4

<p>I am going to keep bumping this until somebody takes the bait. </p>

<p>…c’mon. I have faith in you…</p>

5

<p>Where is it? :O</p>

6

<p>I’ll go over it.</p>

7

<p>Great! I sent it to you, so I am excited about getting your feedback.
If anyone else would like to read it…that would be great!</p>

<p>At this point it is at 282 words so I am focusing a bit more on cutting than on expanding…if that helps with the review process. There are many things I would like to add but I am (perhaps naively) hoping that the essay does not require too much more elaboration. Thanks!</p>