<p>Hi guys,
I am a student in an upstate state school in New York (SUNY). I am originally from New York City and the transition period from living in such a big city environment to a middle of nowhere area has gotten me very depressed. I have gotten 2 Cs and even failed a class this spring semester. I'm not sure if I am just not cut out to living on my own or if the school itself is just a terrible fit. I did make some friends there and those who do care asked me to stay. I however do not feel connected at all and would have periods of depression where I wouldn't want to eat and would sleep more than usual. Since being back home I find myself getting back to normal and being the same chatty self I used to be.
I'm not sure what to do because the school I go to is supposedly the "public honors college of NY". If I transfer, I doubt I would get in anywhere prestigious because of my lackluster grades. Im so confused and I'm not sure if i should stick it out for one more semester and retake my failed class and get my grades up and then transfer to a good school I have cried more than 3 times during my 2 semesters there and have grown bitter and resentful. What should I do? Should I leave my friends and start over (not sure where) or stay there and tough it out.</p>
<p>Reading your post, it seems to me that you’ve already made up your mind and are just looking for us to validate that decision </p>
<p>Not that that’s wrong, I do it all the time to. I think ultimately you need to think about it rationally (which is not to say discount how you’re feeling. In fact that should be a factor too) and decide for yourself if it’s worth it. </p>
<p>Ultimately, if you can afford the time, money and can get your documents in order (recommendations included) then i’d say apply. It’s much easier to have something that you can reject than have no options at all. Personally, I was teetering too until my 2nd year when I decided my parents shouldn’t have to pay for me to be unhappy. You only live once, eh?</p>
<p>Worst comes to worst, you know you’d have tried. Good luck and take care.</p>
<p>Thank you so much for responding so quickly.And you are right, I really do want to leave.
I’m just so confused though. I have said it myself many times that I should leave and that I hated it there. But I’m so scared of disappointing my parents. I was thinking of enrolling in a cuny but I know everyone will think that I am weak and cunys scare me. I’m afraid I won’t be able to do well and get individual attention from professors.
I actually did apply for the fall 2011 semester to other schools but have been rejected by all of them. These schools I would definitely want to attend in a heartbeat but because I was rejected, im not sure if i should just go back to my old school and work hard to try again and get in. I’m just so scared.</p>
<p>:( Im so confused</p>
<p>What have you done about your depression? Have you talked to your parents? Have you talked to a mental health counselor at your school? The most important thing right now is not college, but your state of mind. If you haven’t already, please seek help and talk to your parents about how you’re feeling, they can help!</p>
<p>I believe the most important thing is that you should be happy. I have a friend with a similar case… she was in one of the most prestigious schools at my country, but it just wasn’t a fit. She used to cry a lot and any small thing related to the school ruined her day. She transfered to a different school which was a perfect match but less prestigious, but that really does not matter that much. She is happy with her decision and loves her new school.</p>
<p>I know that the decision is tough, but it really is yours to make. If you do chose to transfer just make sure that you ace all your classes and usually universities allow you to explain why you had a bad semester… </p>
<p>And do make sure that you talk to somebody about how you feel, because as entomom said, your health comes first. </p>
<p>cheer up =) and good luck with your decision!</p>
<p>MagicPasta,</p>
<p>I really do understand you…sometimes the environment is changed and you feel as if you were Lydia led by Wickham to somewhere you do not have any connections. Life then becomes depressed…blablabla…I felt the exact same thing during my first freshman semester. I applied for transfer for fall and although I had a very good GPA and took all those “high-tech” classes, I got rejected by most of the dream schools. But during the whole tedious transfer process, I did discover something fabulous around me, and I start to like where I am. It does not really matter what the others say…You’re only going to be with them for a shooooorrrt time, in life. I’d say, just stick to pursuing what your heart is heading for. Best.<<</p>
<p>Dear everyone,
I am getting more and more afraid because I do not think I’ll be able to even transfer to a city college this semester. I am dreading the thought of having to spend an entire semester back in my old college. I do not think I can take it.</p>
<p>Talk to your parents, find a counselor, and defer school for a semester. You need to seek help where you live, the internet cannot replace that support. Do it now, please.</p>
<p>I felt the exact same way. I went to my school for its theatre program, but once I got there I hated it. I was completely miserable. I blew off my finals and (obviously) ended up failing all my classes.
I was just so unhappy that I couldn’t focus on my work. It was extremely difficult for me to balance work with trying to have a social life.
At first, I was worried to tell my parents. I was scared that they’d be upset, and they were. But I figure they’d rather be disappointed than attend my funeral. I now go to a community college near my home and I’m much happier.
Best wishes.</p>