<p>NJres you said pretty much exactly what I was going to say. These awards seem to be so hit and miss, and so random, that it's hard to say they are all meaningless -- many of them go to very deserving students. I can't imagine how one could complain without sounding like a whiner, or (worse) one of those self-esteem gurus who want to make sure everyone gets an award so nobody's feelings will get hurt. <em>sigh</em> It's a dilemma. I'm pretty sure my S will be in this crowd in a few years. A bright, wonderful kid who is shy and quiet. </p>
<p>But, he's already seen how the "system" at his HS works, and is disdainful of the kids who are floating through school on nothing but athletic ability, money, and/or charisma. So I don't think Senior Awards will come as any great surprise or disappointment to him.</p>
<p>It is hard to watch one's kid come home disheartened. At our school's large and formal athlete/parent/coach dinner, 24 varsity coaches made presentations to their graduating seniors. Many took the time to find something positive to say about each kid, even if they were not the designated MVP. My son's coach gave a fairly perfunctory presentation, with no handshakes or anecdotes or even saying the senior's names. The MVP was (rightfully) recognized and then a special recognition award was given to another co-captain who had done almost nothing for the team but show up, sometimes arriving late or leaving early. My jaw dropped, knowing the probably 150 hours of effort and heart that my (unrecognized) son has poured into this team over the last couple of years...coordinating fundraisers and several orders of spirit clothing...taking on extra followup and community service coordination... collecting money for coaches gifts...from over 50 athletes on this large team. He has loved it and did things that he thought should be done. He had fun doing it though it was at times frustrating to always be the one making things happen and taking responsibility. The projects were done with the support of the athletes and parents and coach. It has been gratifying for him to see each project come to life. However, after four years as a varsity athlete with this coach, who did write a glowing though garbled recommendation for my son, we would have been better off to skip this event. All I can say to my son is I'm sorry, you should have been recognized, I don't understand it either, and welcome to the real world. He never did it for the recognition, but he would truly have appreciated some sort of small gesture in front of his peers.</p>
<p>Look at the bright side. Very soon, you and you child will be out of the high school environment that causes so much grief. Nobody can disagree that the "system" can be unjust and cruel. Even schools that are keenly aware of the harm that awards might cause are not immune to criticisms. Schools that "spread the wealth around" are criticicized for not rewarding the "truly deserving" ones. Schools that follow an opposite system are equally criticized. The reality is that not every accomplishment can receive a corresponding award. If something felt unjust , the best balm is to move on and try to be happy for the other's good fortune. </p>
<p>For instance, back in the YMCA days, I always liked that the "trophy" for most improved player or best teammate was bigger and nicer than the one for MVP -if one was given. The players who heard accolades all year long do NOT really need a six-dollar plastic figurine to feel better. Seeing a teammate who warmed the bench most of the season getting "some" acknowledgment for always showing up and trying harder meant a lot more! </p>
<p>Despite not winning, not being picked for an award does not make anyone a loser. I think that children are more used to the "not-being-picked" syndrome and also forget faster than adults do! Diminishing the importance of awards might go a long way to focus on what is truly important in high school.</p>
<p>I was one of those "quiet kids" in HS, who did well, but was never formally recognized. I even remember winning a swimming competition, only to have my name rescinded after an "involved" parent whose son was in another heat asked the judge to 'recheck" our times.</p>
<p>Anyway, I graduated university summa cum laude, went on to professional school and now have a pretty good life, if I must say so myself.</p>
<p>As others have mentioned, some of these kids are having their life's peak in HS, and it's all downhill from there.</p>
<p>One last thought: One reason the very selective colleges look for national and state-level awards on the "Honors and Awards" section of your app is because winning stuff on a larger stage lessens the likelihood of silliness and politics in the awards. They know quite well that getting your high school's Biology award is no guarantee that you're the best Bio student they have. If your child realizes that most of the HS awards are as capricious and value-less as the copy paper they're laser-printed on, he'll set his sights on more meaningful objectives. My daughter was crushed when she didn't get into her school's Cum Laude Society during Junior year, when she was convinced it really mattered. But interviewers for four top colleges told her they'd never heard of it. Now that she's starting Berkeley in the fall, it's all so High School.</p>
<p>susu, actually Cum Laude Society is well-known in the upper echelon colleges(see Hughes' book) because it is one of the few awards, unlike NHS, which is solely dependent on academics. The top 10% of junior and senior classes are eligible, so in schools that do not rank, Cum Laude Society gives the college an estimate of class rank.</p>
<p>To lefthandofdog, re the comment about small monetary awards: I think that in some cases, teachers take financial need into account when choosing the award winners. When my son graduated h.s., one girl got a lot of awards, pretty much all of the ones with money attached that were in any way appropriate. I didn't ask what went into the selection process, but I know the girl came from a single-parent home where there was a very large family, and that the family has had some significant financial problems. This girl was the "star" of her family and had been admitted to a private LAC -- and of course was one of the top 5 students at the high school So I never really asked, but I assumed that "she really needs the money" was part of the rationale, and the reason why she got awards while the val & sal did not. </p>
<p>It would have been nice for my son to get some awards that came with money -- but then, we really couldn't compete on the financial need front.</p>
<p>At my daughter's elementary school, they used to give awards of school shirts & uniforms for various honors. Somehow, they always seemed to go to the needy kids who were bused in from the poorer neighborhoods ;). All of the teachers knew (we knew because the vp was a friend of ours), but no one was the wiser. It's a lot nicer than receiving charity.</p>
<p>calmom - I realized as the evening wore on that that was indeed the case for a couple of the multi-award winners and so I don't begrudge them the awards. At the same time, those are the very students who are most likely to benefit from financial aid policies, so when local schools decide who has the greatest need, they might be rewarding students who will be receiving full financial aid. </p>
<p>Iderochi is dead on - it's very hard to ensure equitable distribution of awards/honors without getting sucked into the self-esteem vortex. Luckily senior year (of high school) comes but once a lifetime.</p>
<p>Didn't we beat this concept to death on another thread recently. Conclusion was that senior awards mean less than nothing and are more of a popularity contest or "feel good" awards. Take consulation in the fact that adcoms at Ivy League schools have a better perspective than the idiots at your high school that select winners of these dopey awards. Keep your eye on the larger issue. As I mentionned my son was accepted at Yale, Harvard, MIT, Cornell, etc and was a highly recruited athlete. All that and he recieved nothing. We have moved on. We have however learned not to expect anything when our youngest comes along. Expect nothing and be surprised if you get anything. I know it sound cynical but it works.</p>
<p>Actually, my son had been accepted to the same college as this girl had, had been offered the exact same $5000 merit scholarship, and while he also had a very good financial aid package from the school, it was very heavy on loans and work study - about twice as much in subsidized loans as any other school, as they gave my son a Perkins on top of a Stafford. So I can assume that the girl ended up with the same: lots of loans.</p>
<p>My son got money that year from the "Grandparent's Award" (you know, the one that financially well-off grandparents give on special occasions like wedding and graduations). He spent about $2000 on his computer - it was a few years back when computer prices were still somewhat higher than they are now -- plus there were also all sorts of dorm-room expenses that I picked up. Financial aid doesn't really cover those sorts of things, nor does it pay for multiple trips back & forth, but poor kids like to come home for Thanksgiving and Christmas as much as rich kids do. In a family where finances are very limited, the older teen might have already been earning and contributing to the family - so for some very poor families, a kid going off to college represents a net loss of income. </p>
<p>So financial aid doesn't really cut it for a lot of these families. I know that it is frustrating to be solidly middle class and having to really stretch or tighten our belts to meet an EFC of $15,000 or $25,000 annually -- but our idea of belt-tightening is how some families live all the time. I still think that in the end we are faring better than most kids who come from needier families.</p>
<p>We, too, have witnessed awards that were crazy. Our school gives a "book" award in each subject, in each grade. One year, My D saw her language teacher the day after the ceremony- the teacher had been out sick and missed the event, but congratulated my DD on her language award- which DD had not received! :confused: We found out that the #2 nominated kid- the child of another staffer-was given that award! The language teacher was taken aback. At the same time, my D had received the award in another subject and that teacher told us she was tied for it and they went to a tie-breaker. So, the kid who was tied with D, did not get an award, but the #2 in language-child of staff- did get an award. That was true politics. :rolleyes:</p>
<p>Our school likes to share the wealth and try not to give more than one major award to one person. My D is very accomplished in her sport and received a tournament award (major) T shirt last year at the championships. This year, they won again. The coach announced my D could not get the T-shirt again (Why not? :D) so he gave it to another kid. The reaction, none of the team applauded. My D was irritated- not with not getting the shirt, as she told me, she has the shirt for the USA national team :o, she doesn't need that one! But, the girl they picked was one who has been good, but is very "needy" and it feels like every one is always trying to boost her ego. I hate when they give an ego boost award and every one knows (kids & adults) that's what is going on- there is no respect for the kid or the award. There were several players who my D and the others felt deserved the T-shirt award more, my D also thought that if they were going to tell every one she could not get it again (implying she deserved it) then perhaps they should have asked her opinion about it!</p>
<p>PS: On ranking & weighted vs. unweighted classes, our private school has an interesting solution</p>
<p>The classes are ability-grouped, the most advanced class does waaay more work than the lowest class. The very same final exam is given to every kid-so the kids in the lowest class may have a decently high grade, but when they take the final, they cannot do all the work at the level they have been doing the basic classwork. The highest class may have the same class grade going in, but the final should be a piece of cake for them. Every so often, you will see the lowest kids in the #1 class and the highest in the #2 class overlapping and as they take more electives in the final years, they can pick classes they like and so, AP Physics and regular oceanography count the same, so it is possible that #9 & #11 are closer than they should be, but generally, the grading is so difficult that only the brightest kids have the highest grades. After reading this board for 4 years, I can see that it works far better than I originally realised.</p>
<p>There is still some advantage for the kids who were held back to start school as older kids, as has been discussed on other threads, but in general, that same final for all of English 12, etc., is a real equalizer! Also, the exam counts for a larger % of the various classes, which evens things out in a way.</p>
<p>At our school, a lot of the monetary scholarships require application by the students, and have specific criteria (like an intended career in elementary education, for example). They may require writing an essay on a certain topic as part of the application (for example, the teacher or school staff member who influenced you). Many students do not bother to go the guidance office and go through the whole pile of scholarship applications to find the ones applicable to them. The ones who do are obviously the ones awarded the scholarships.</p>
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<p>Our school likes to share the wealth and try not to give more than one major award to one person. >></p>
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<p>This has its ups and downs. At dd's school there is ONE girl who has gotten the superintendents award THREE years running. Now come on...surely she isn't the only one in a class of 198 who is deserving of this award. Every year there are a few kids who (are deserving mind you) take home 4 or 5 awards. At the same time there are kids who (also deserving) are not even invited to the awards night because there "wasn't an award to give to them" (this is what the GC told me). I am a strong proponent of awarding those who deserve the awards, but I find it very tiring that every year there are the quiet, non-horn blowing, honors/ap, all A's kids who go unrecognized. It happens that my kid is one of them.</p>
<p>NSM is SO RIGHT ON here. HS awards are absolutely a popularity contest. Life is sometimes unfair and this is just the beginning--focus on the future. She is just so right that I won't bother to try to echo in different words.</p>
<p>I think part of the problem with high school awards is that they are often designated for the student who has the highest average in a particular subject. That often leads to one or two kids getting the lion's share. For example, my son has typically gotten the English award each year for that reason, even tho he always says that he is not the most creative writer. I think that if more awards were designed to recognize talents and contributions that are not just by the numbers, it would free up the faculty to honor a wider range of students. At the same time, they could pick people who truly deserve the such awards, so that the process is still based on true merit.</p>
<p>Donemom, I have the other side of that coin at my house. My daughter routinely has the highest average in English or History .This year's AP English award did not go to any student in the top 5 of class grades, but to the student who placed highest in UIL competition. (I thought they already got an award for that? LOL.) . The award is given to others subjectively "more deserving" or "more talented". Yeah, right. Give them a creative writing award if they need more validation than the UIL medal provides (which is announced at awards night,also.) . I have no problem with that.</p>
<p>But , in more quantitative classes like Math and Science, she does win with great regularity. One more year and she is done.</p>
<p>The kids know it's "political" and they laugh about it.</p>
<p>Curmedgeon,so then you're essentially saying the oppositie of many previous posters who feel that significant awards outside the high school make students more, not less, deserving of a high school award in that field. Maybe what can be concluded is that a parents' view of high school awards is completely subjective...depends only on whether the system recognizes their kid. Perhaps it is not so easy for schools to develop a system that most would deem fair.</p>