<p>OK okokokok so like I might get a 3.9 GPA this semester!!!! I CAN'T DO THAT. I NEED A 4.0. I mean seriously a 3.9 wow I might as well just be applying to McDonald's already.</p>
<p>What should I do? I think I'm gonna be forever alone, nobody likes a person who doesn't have a 4.0 :(</p>
<p>How the world can anybody help me at the end of semester?</p>
<p>idkkkkkk mayb someone could like tell me how to hack in to the school computers!! Like it’s TTLY a violation of honor code BUTTTT maybe they won’t mind cuz like it’ll show I’m super smart 
</p>
<p>I DESERVE a 4.0 and anything less is dishonor, and I was raisedin the samurai tradish. Meaning if I dishonor my fam I have to commit seppuku :(</p>
<p>A 3.9?? You should probably just start filling out your application to Wendy’s now. You must be realllllly stoopid or something.</p>
<p>idk about wendy’s, cuz like McD’s is the lowest brow fast food chain, wendy’s is a bit better, I can’t even get a 4.0 in college so why would wendy’s want me?</p>
<p>This thread made me lol. Thank you</p>
<p>Though, as far as fast food restaurants go, Burger King is definitely a notch below McDonald’s, so at least you have a back up plan.</p>
<p>only a 3.9!!! You might as well deliberately dive off a cliff… srsly, a 3.9 would equate the dignity of a porn-star.</p>
<p>how am I gonna tell my parents?</p>
<p>Unless you plan on living on your own, I wouldn’t dare to tell 'em.</p>
<p>Yeah, I mean they’ll probably just give up entirely on you.</p>
<p>Sleep with the prof for the 4.0 duh. And the prof being male its no excuse… Suck it up.</p>
<p>3.9? Did you even like… go to classes, at all? You suck.</p>
<p>lol liberal art major</p>
<p>@Romani that may be my only option but I can’t even get a 4.0, what makes you think I can perform?</p>
<p>@karabee please don’t be so hurtful, what did I even do to you? :(</p>
<p>I wouldn’t even bother with the fast food places… just join the peace corps and leave the country for a few years. Then come back and try again.</p>
<p>I actually got slightly better than a 3.9 this quarter, but I too wanted a 4.0 :(</p>
<p>Pay the professor. If you’re female, sexual favors. Male - um …</p>
<p>Okay I know the thread is in satire but to be fair some of us needed 4.0s this semester (and next) to fix crummy 2.811 GPAs and through magic raise them to 3.7s overall. I’ve accepted that I’ll get a B in chem though, and that it’s okay because 3.6 is just as good for UCLA Psych</p>
<p>It doesn’t really matter, if you’re not in engineering you’re going to end up working at a fast food restaurant anyways.</p>
<p>3.9…disgusting. You should just drop out and be a bum on the street, not even McDonald’s will want you…</p>