<p>The thread is long, but see the thread below that was posted here a few weeks ago. The OPs son stays up into the wee hours of the morning on the internet, then sleeps through classes. He doesn’t go to exams, doesn’t take his mediciation, and generally doesn’t take care of himself. </p>
<p>I’m not as callous and cold as you all think I am. I will say, though, that my experience as an undergraduate is over fifty percent of my classmates were weeded out for various reasons. Some couldn’t handle the material, some didn’t have the right study habits, some preferred to party, some just didn’t enjoy college. I am leery about people who hide behind a label to justify poor performance in school. Half of my classmates couldn’t make it due to poor academic performance and most of those exhibited the symptoms that people have described those afflicted with Aspergers. And I am pretty sure that half of my classmates don’t have Aspergers - it was simply a hard program that required self discipline and focus.</p>
<p>And were any of your classmates diagnosed with Asperger’s, bigtrees? No? Then maybe there’s a difference between people who are diagnosed with Asperger’s (because they have Asperger’s), and people who aren’t diagnosed with Asperger’s (because they don’t have Asperger’s). </p>
<p>I’d love to know your suggestions for people with Asperger’s, bigtrees. Should a bright student who has executive function problems and social difficulties just starve in the gutter? What’s your plan? Perhaps you think someone with executive function deficits doesn’t actually have them? Or do you think that someone with Asperger’s should just stay at their parents’ house on the sofa? How should my Asperger’s son not “hide behind a label”? What’s your prescription here?</p>
<p>1) Make a best-effort attempt at college. From what you describe, a college close to home in a more structured environment sounds like the best option. It might be best to start at a community college for a year 2 degree and then transfer to a university. Work with the disability office to take advantage of reasonable accomodations they but recognize that they may not provide everything the student wants and passing classes isn’t promised.</p>
<p>2) If the student can’t finish college, he/she should recognize that many people have successful lives without a college degree and that the things that he/she is struggling with in college don’t necessarily reflect what happens in real life. Go off and live a happy and successful life.</p>
<p>A person with Aspergers could be highly successful at the company that I work at in many skilled positions, and would fail miserably in other skilled positions. I’d suggest that the person with Aspergers do the positions that he/she would succeed at.</p>
<p>True Asperger’s person have specialized interests in a particular area. If the OP can determine his/her child’s special interests, and then try to match the program to the child’s area of high interest, then there should be real academic success in college. Special interests also go hand in hand with social needs–i.e. placing your child in a school which offers the extra curricular activities of high interest in order to find like minded kids.</p>
<p>When I posted my question on CC I was hoping I would get opinions from people who have been through this process and would have some understanding. Most of you do, and are knowledgeable and it is appreciated. I won’t even address some of the stupid comments that are made here.</p>
<p>The austism/asperger’s spectrum is huge and without knowing each indvidual(sorry I won’t use spell check because that wouldn’t be fair) it’s hard to say what would be good for one student and not another. Temple Grandin did well at her college because she had a undrstanding teacher .I don’t think it really would matter in her field of study that she might spell incorrectly (if that was one of her deficits) I don’t think the cows would care!</p>
<p>The real world is tough and college is not for everyone, but let’s just try to have an atmosphere where minds that think differently can excel. Otherwise, this world will be a dull and unintersting place and we can say goodby to individuals who can make a contribution to this world, if given a chance and some understanding. I’m not saying a free ride but spell check and grammar waived will not lower the standards of our institutions.</p>
<p>Back to the topic.<br>
I agree that a student might get lost in a larger institution (note, it was U. Delaware- honors) but even in a small school like Muhlenberg, if the student has severe executive function disorder, they will not get it together to get up for classes. I know a “bright” student at Muhlenberg who slept through his finals and is now transfering for a better “fit”
school. I also agree that a local community school might be a “safer” fit, but my son wants to be like everyone else of his school rank and SAT scores. We have given him the chance to go to a pre-college summer experience and he did great. Therefore, I will give
him the chance to go somewhere we all think he can excel.</p>
<p>Using correct grammar and proper spelling shouldn’t be waived for an Aspergers student if it’s deemed proper spelling and grammer is essential to the program, and most college students are expected to spell and use good grammar by the time they graduate.</p>
<p>But what is reasonable is allowing the use of a spell checker because that’s a reasonable accomodation a person might have later in life.</p>
<p>But if a person fills e-mails with mispelled words and bad grammer, that person probably won’t be effective in the workforce. If a person types formal reports for clients that are filled with misspellings and bad grammar, the client probably won’t hire them again.</p>
<p>Spelling and grammar are essential in our world. The person who has a disability with this but wants to work in an office (most college graduate jobs) must “find a way” to spell properly.</p>
<p>Sorry if you think this is a stupid comment.</p>
<p>Bigtrees & Benny, you might as well say that reading shouldn’t be waived for blind students if it is deemed that proper reading skills are essential to the program, and most college students are expected to read by the time they graduate. That’s just great – but what have you accomplished? There is a substantial distinction, at least in my mind, between accommodations that give a student an unfair advantage (you don’t have to answer essay questions on exams that everyone else has to answer) and those that help students compete on a more level playing field - everyone has to write a term paper, but students who have visual impairments can dictate their answers, and students with physical handwriting handicaps can dictate or use a computer with spell check to write their answers. This type of accommodation isn’t giving an unfair advantage to blind students or to students with handwriting disabilities, it is allowing them to participate in the important aspects of demonstrating understanding of the material being taught, unless the class itself is a class on handwriting or calligraphy. </p>
<p>College is not subject to the same special education laws that apply in K-12 public education, where the substantive requirements must be changed to accommodate the child’s specific needs. But there are still requirements to accommodate disabilities, even those that are not “visible” like a white cane. </p>
<p>There were those who said blind students could not go to medical school, because they couldn’t see to perform the dissections for gross anatomy or to perform surgery. Blind students graduate from med schools every year, and go out and become highly successful doctors in many specialties. Would you stand up and deny them that right because in your model of the universe, if someone can’t see, they don’t deserve to be a doctor?</p>
<p>Much of what you’ve said in this thread has a lot of bitterness, as if you’d like to see “those” kids get what (you think) they deserve, which is not much. Maybe you should take the advice and start a thread where you can whine with others about all THOSE laws that let the undeserving participate where you think they shouldn’t. </p>
<p>And I feel very sorry for either of you if you end up with a grandchild that has Asperger’s or some other disabling condition. I feel even more sorry for the grandchild.</p>
<p>I’m sorry if this seems a little harsh, but I’ve spent my morning at a Title IX program, and it is discouraging how many people still don’t buy into equal access, and how they directly and indirectly subvert the intent and plain language of the law because it doesn’t conform to their belief in how things should work. I’m sure they would have been the same people arguing against a lot of other civil rights laws in decades past.</p>
<p>Confusedmom- Have him go to the closest school that seems to have the most responsive/suitable disabilities office. If you have to make the trip there to figure something out or to lend support to your son, it should not be as difficult.</p>
<p>the school we have in mind is driveable, although not that close and if he wanted to come home for a weekend he could. We were suppose to go to see the campus for the welcome weekend but son has 103 fever, so that was a no go. We then discussed how he would handle being sick at school. It is scary for someone who might not have a large social network.
I do have friends who kids are at the school who could keep an eye on him.
so as far as I can tell, the school has a great disability office, alot of clubs where he could meet like minded students, is a driveable distance, great departments in his interests, and most importantly he wants to go there!</p>
<p>Maybe you are no longer on College Confidential, but I was curious to know which school your son ended up in. My older son, who has Asperger’s, is now in Wesleyan University. My daughter, who also has Asperger’s, is now deciding what school she attend. Two of the schools she is considering were on your son’s list - Muhlenberg and University of Delaware. The others are U of Mass @ Amherst, Ithaca, Towson, Quinnipiac and American University.</p>
<p>If you are still on CC, I’d love to hear from you.</p>