so… ive been trying to weave the
faculty, student ratio, culture, faculties, etc facts together and to make a compelling essay but its starting to sound redundant… can someone help me ?
Forget all that. You’re hitting on buzzwords and it’s going to come across contrived. What 17-year-old really wants to attend a college because of the student-to-faculty ratio?
Instead, start a freewriting exercise. Think about it - why DO you want to go to this college? What is it about it that resonates with you? The college knows their own laundry list of achievements and facts; they don’t need a high school senior to parrot it back to them. What about those things appeal to you?
For example, the faculty-to-student ratio is meaningless without context - what’s really important to you, probably, is the idea of small classes where you can have lively discussions with smart classmates and engaged professors. Discussing the facilities is boring - but you can discuss how you’re passionate about astronomy and so you’re really excited about using the brand-new telescope in their multimillion dollar science center, or you’re a fanatic for history so you can’t wait to immerse yourself in the rare books library. Culture - what about it? Do you see yourself kicking it with the famously quirky student body who do things like have naked runs at 3 am on the last day before finals and eschew homecoming for a big bonfire singalong? Or is it that you can’t wait to wake up at the crack of dawn and get together with other spirited friends to cheer for the team, even when it’s freezing cold in November?
In other words, forget about the “facts” that the brochure lists and focus on how the school makes you FEEL. Close your eyes and imagine it, if you have to, and then write what you see. That’s the zero draft - the beginning of some fodder for your essay. Then you can use that base to reshape and turn into a compelling story for why you want to go there.