<p>I am choosing between two amazing, wonderful Ivy league schools, both of which I could see myself attending. One is located a subway away from my home, and the other requires a ~4 hour drive. I would dorm at both, however, and so would enjoy being a part of the campus life at either. The school that is farther away seems to suit my needs and preferences--but I am afraid of living so far away. Now, I know that some students travel on 20 hour plane rides to come to college, and that for them, and for many other students, 4 hours seems like nothing. I never saw myself moving farther than an hours drive, though...this suprising opportunity has come as somewhat of a shock, and I wouldn't want the possibility of homesickness to deter me from the benefits of the school. BUT it might be even worse if I am severely homesick 200 miles away, and can't enjoy my college experience because of this. </p>
<p>I've never been away from home before, except for a 1 week camping trip when I was thirteen--and the entire time, I desperately wanted to go home. This was a while back and it was a cold, dreary forest setting...but my closest friends were there and I still wanted to return home. </p>
<p>I am confused. I don't want the possibility of severe homesickness to make my decision...but I don't want a wonderful opportunity to become a frightening burden as September approaches.</p>
<p>ADVICE anyone? I really can't express my concerns to my parents, because they will immedietly encourage me to stay nearby. But thats just the parental concern...so I need some outside opinions =)</p>
<p>No one is really going to be able to answer this for you. You need to really think about it. </p>
<p>Know that most kids get homesick, and most kids can handle it, but nobody knows how YOU will handle it.</p>
<p>When I was young I went away to camp too, and I was ok during the day, but got very homesick at night. I went to college 8 hours from home and it was fine. There were certainly times that I needed my parents, but they were specific incidents, not that generalized homesick feeling.</p>
<p>Recognizing that homesickness could be a serious problem for you, considering that you can see yourself happy at either school, and since you will reside in the dorms, I'd go to the school that's a subway ride from home. You get the best of both worlds (school and home) and can choose between the two at the spur of the moment.</p>
<p>dude, come on. you're going to have to leave home sometime. the only way homesickness can ruin your year is if you let it - it's something that you can control, manage and come out of the experience all the stronger. </p>
<p>don't kick off your college career by submitting life decisions to a trivial mental hangup.</p>
<p>Man up. And I agree with jack up above me; this may be your most trivial concern. Also, I, along with everyone else here, don't know you well enough to predict your "attitude" towards...well, anything.</p>
<p>Okay, so I have had similar concerns regarding which school to attend.</p>
<p>I think that you might be MORE homesick with the college close to home. Here is why: You will become homesick, and go home for a weekend. And continue to do this. It will prolong your period of homesickness. Go to the college farther away and suddenly you can't go home every weekend. You will become homesick, but you will get over it faster and learn to adapt simply because you won't be able to go home.</p>
<p>Thats my logic. Once you decide, don't look back. Any regrets or "what ifs", are only going to make your college life less fun.</p>
<p>Completely agreeing with the poster above me. If you have the opportunity to go home when you're feeling bad, you'll take it every time and you'll never get over it.</p>
<p>Everyone gets homesick a little bit when they're at college. For me, it didn't hit until I was at graduate school and couldn't come home for Thanksgiving. Before then, I had been away from home for almost a year at a time, but it just hit really bad then since I had always been home for the holiday, and it was the time when I got to see all of my relatives. When they sent family pictures the spot I'm always sitting in was empty. :(</p>
<p>Thank you for the responses! I know that this is something I have to consider personally, and that my mere explanatioin in a post will not give a complete view of my personality. But I do truly appreciate your input and perspectives! If homesickness is a part of life, a part of growing up and becoming an adult, I don't think I should prolong the process because of anxiety...something I'm sure most college bound students are feeling. Hearing the advice of others is always helpful--I am very grateful for your guidance! =)</p>
<p>I know this is your personal choice and decision, but I'm a parent of an only child who I had great concerns about her being homesick. She had only been away once and missed home very badly.</p>
<p>She is attending a school 5 hours away from home, and with today's technology we can stay in touch by phone, e-mail, instant messaging... Mostly as the Mom, I just check her away message to know she is alright, but let her do the calling or initiate any instant messaging.</p>
<p>One problem you may have if you are so close to home will be in that it would be very easy to run home if things are not going perfectly. While you are running home, the other kids will be making friends and you might feel left out. </p>
<p>I'm sure after some thought you will be able to make the right decision for you!</p>
<p>think about who you were at 13 and who you are now...are you still afraid of the same things, or have you conquered lots of childhood fears</p>
<p>you are holding onto an experience from when you were most likely in middle school, and that is clouding your judgement</p>
<p>And IF you were homesick, do you think going home everyweekend and hanging with mom and dad is a good plan? Because that seems to be what you must be thinking of doing</p>
<p>What are the PLUSes of staying closer to home...and what benefit will you gain with the idea that you can escape to go home?</p>
<p>You can not assume that hanging out in a dreary forest camp is the same as an exciting college you have been given the amazing opportunity to attend</p>
<p>you have five years of growth and maturity under your belt already, and don't hold yourself back because of something that happened 5 years ago, you are a different person now</p>
<p>Going to camp when you're a kid is completely and utterly different from going to college. Pleeeease don't use that past experience as a predictor of future problems!! Your experience is almost identical to my own, and I handled college (4 hours away!) just fine! If you like the farther school better, go to the farther school.</p>
<p>I can understand you worrying about being homesick; I was worried at first too! But seriously, right on move-in day, you're busy thinking and planning so much stuff that it doesn't really sink in until much later, and by the time that happens, you'll already have felt partially "adjusted". Trust me. :)</p>
<p>lol...some of my friends can't wait to get away from their families...and I consider them lucky! But it seems worth it, the attempting to conquer my fears! Thanks for the encouraging words and advice! =)</p>
<p>It's definitely worth noting that you're going to save money by commuting. Furthermore, I don't know what your relationship with your parents and immediate family is like, but I get along with mine just fine, so I'm glad that I commuted so that I could stay with them, help out around the house (instead of just leeching off them from afar), and of course, save money. If you don't have any problems with your parents and immediate family, that's all the more reason to commute to college instead of dorm. </p>
<p>There was a pretty good article in the paper years ago about how college students have a blast in the dorms during the first month or so...then the reality of sharing their personal space and whatnot with a stranger sets in, and it becomes not as much fun as it used to be. At that point, you might as well be flushing the $2000 or however much it costs to live on college down the drain, for all the good it's doing you.</p>
<p>I was in a similar situation as you, every paper, magazine, online article and everything said "dorm dorm dorm, you have to dorm" when that's actually not the case, commuting IS an option, and it's a great one which I'm glad I chose. I'm having a lot of fun commuting, and yes, I talk to lots of people and have friends, I don't huddle in a little hole in the wall here while I'm not in class waiting for the next class to start.</p>