<p>Please do not post essays up like this! <a href=“http://talk.collegeconfidential.com/college-essays/255610-posting-essays-other-sensitive-information.html[/url]”>http://talk.collegeconfidential.com/college-essays/255610-posting-essays-other-sensitive-information.html</a></p>
<p>Anyway, the essay is well-written for UC schools - they tend to not prefer flowery pieces so good job. But your last sentence is a little weird. Don’t say things like “looks good on a college transcript”. Remove that bit and just start the sentence by saying “Debate teaches you skills…”</p>