<p>I moved like 4 years ago and I never felt like I properly settled/blended in. In fact, I feel the opposite. Every year whenever teachers ask students to go into groups or find a group, no one ever picks me. And it's not even because I'm a freak. It's just because I have no similarities with anyone.</p>
<p>Okay, cliques. We all heard of them and we all mostly know what they are "nicknamed" for. Well most of the smartest people in my school are complete jocks, so I can't even hang out with them because I'll never know what they are talking about (not to mention I'm pretty quiet. So it's awkward). Band, another group that I have some similarities with, are prep monsters. And so on. </p>
<p>Basically, the current "only" friend I have at this school is this really shy (but popular) girl. And it's so weird being her friend (not her tag-along, but a legit friend) because everywhere I go, she gets a hello or a compliment, etc. </p>
<p>Anyway. This year is no different from the last 3 years. My "friends" only pick me to be part of their group if they need one more. Like they pick other people before me. And I hate that feeling. Because seriously, being an outcast sucks. It's like no one picks you unless they NEED to. I personally like people to pick me because they WANT to. </p>
<p>And look, no one (seriously. NO ONE) in my school plans to attend ivy leagues in a serious tone (like there are a few jokesters who say they want to go to Harvard, but they are taking 0 hard classes and 0 clubs, which I know isn't everything, but still). I feel like a dick whenever I say I want to go to Columbia because everyone treats it like a joke (or just pushes me aside and call me nerd).</p>
<p>Sorry for the rant. But I'm just sick of this. Every year I have to endure it. Any advice?</p>
<p>I know how you feel. That’s how it was for in middle school. I’ve found I fit in best with the band and IB kids (though I play no musical instrument nor am I in IB). I found my “group” in gym freshman year (we all hated it), and then I got introduced to their friends. I met 1 IB kid at a pep rally freshman year (we were both being crushed by this huge girl who kept standing up and cheering). I was then introduced to her friends (who were also in IB). </p>
<p>Once you find 1 friend (which you’ve done), you just have to find a way to be introduced to her friends. I’m not outgoing but this was/is the easiest way to make friends for me.</p>
<p>Unfortunately, a lot of my friends aren’t in the same classes as me so I end up like you (that one person who has no one when asked to pick partners/groups).</p>
<p>I err am probably the worst person to be giving this advise. I’m outgoing and I get ‘hellos’ and small chat but actual friends.
Nope. I get bored if people or they treat me weird or I don’t feel like I fit in or whatever. My advise to you? Just talk to people. Everyone . Sitting next to a girl in maths? Talk to her. You might end up only just smiling at her in hallways rather then having sleep overs but it’s a sorta safety net.
When people get too close with their friends there is always drama. So I keep some people that I can hang out with whenever and who I don’t hate to sit with and write whenever im lonely.
But legit friends… I can’t help you</p>
<p>I’m in the same situation as you. I moved 2 years ago, and I still don’t feel like I fit in. People only pick me to be part of their group because they think I’m ‘smart’ and then they won’t have to do any work. I’ve made a couple of close friends, but it was via my guidance counselor. (awkward…) Anyways, we’re the exact opposite, and I’ve never had one class with any of them. Luckily, I joined marching band this year and I’ve made some friends.</p>
<p>Thanks for the advice. :)</p>
<p>But sad part is, I actually know everyone. And yeah. It’s not like I don’t know someone :(</p>
<p>I am in the same exact situation as you, except for the fact that I moved to this school two years ago. Only two of my friends take Honors/AP classes, so most of the time, I’m not in the same class as them and I don’t have any friends in my classes. Whenever we have to get into groups, I’m usually without anyone and the teacher usually puts me into a group (or if I’m lucky, an acquaintance of mine will invite me if they need another person–everyone considers me “nice”, but apparently I’m not good enough to be their first choice). And if the teacher assigns the group… well, I always get stuck with guys for some reason, and they don’t even try to include me in their conversations (they usually talk about something like video games or sports or their friends, which I can’t relate to). It’s like I’m not even there. 
Sorry for the lack of advice, but I can relate to what you’re going through.</p>
<p>I understand how you feel. Everyone wants to feel included. I likewise moved years ago, however my closest friends are those that I met at a young age in my old town. I’ve made many “casual” friends but still occasionally feel excluded when group projects arise. When I’m put in a situation where groups form without me, I try to extend myself to others in the room that seem to be left out of the proverbial “classroom cliques.” I have met some fantastic people this way! Just keep an open mind and you will find that you may have things in common with unexpected people. Even if you have nothing in common, sometimes people who are different from you make great friends. </p>
<p>I will tell you a story. One time, I was at a college prep summer camp. When I came downstairs from the dorm to meet a group of my supposed “friends,” I found that they had left to walk to the breakfast hall without me. In fact, everyone had left except for one guy that I had never met and who was the polar opposite of myself interest-wise. Since we had to walk in groups, I suggested that we start walking together. As it turns out, we talked the entire long walk there. Despite being seemingly so different, we found plenty of common-ground to talk about. </p>
<p>Don’t let yourself be treated like a “second banana” to other peers. Keep your head up and look elsewhere for some true friends. You may find them unexpectedly. :)</p>
<p>I understand how you feel. I switched schools in middle school and it took me two years to make really good friends. I had casual friends but I was never their first choice in groups too. The way I met my absolute best friends now is through the activities that I do. So I would suggest trying a new activity and you might meet someone there. Also, if you’re hanging out with people that don’t really include you then ditch them because you don’t need friends who don’t really care about you. Also, I would not feel bad. Sometimes, no matter how hard you try, you don’t click with people or they just don’t want to be friends. It’s their loss. Good Luck!</p>
<p>I totally get you! I have a similar social situation. I usually just try to forget about the cliques and stuff and just be nice to people and be outgoing. Usually people will accept you, even if you’re not BFFs. I guess what I’m saying is…don’t be intimidated by people. </p>
<p>I know this is sort of crappy advice…I myself have trouble following it. But it’s something to keep in mind.</p>
<p>I came in USA last year and I became one of most popular kid at school by the second week of school!and yeah I was shy too and only a freshmen all the senior and junior were my friends! Get in a sport team try to be friend with you teammate it usually come naturally then try to hang out with them!after that i can insure you will have a whole bunch of friends! I am your opposite I am tired to have 1000 friends!</p>
<p>@kimmylouie: I totally understand. Ever since elementary school, people had only valued me as someone who could help them get good grades on hw or projects. Apart from that, I was always last-pick for p.e. games, fun group projects, or for people looking to make new friends. I guess it had a lot to do with your background and how you came across to people. It’s a sad truth that many people see friends as just an asset to their social rep., not valuing friendship by the true meaning of the word. Same thing happened in middle school. And high school. On the first day or two of school, like any other person, I was a little scared. Since, I had moved 5 times in my entire school life, it was just depressing. I’m not a people person.
But I found that you can find friends in the most unlikely of places. I met this guy in my acdec class, and we were like complete opposites. But after just a year, we r like brothers now. So I’d recommend to get involved and keep an open-mind. Don’t shun people because they don’t share the same interests as you. By being someone’s friend, you don’t have to be in a posse or clique, nor should that be your aim.
But in the even that it doesn’t work out for you, there are always other people out there. Friends can be found anywhere, you just have to keep an eye open.</p>
<p>I wish it was that easy to make friends.</p>
<p>I’ll admit it right now, I’m not the prettiest kid, so just by the aesthetic features, like 95% of my school shuns me. Don’t think thats true? Okay, so there is this girl in my photography class who is pretty, but such a user/partier, and this really smart girl (who I tried to be friends with) like LOVE HER and in 2 days they have inside jokes already. The entire definition of friendship is wrong in high school. Most people go by looks before the person inside (which is totally cliche). </p>
<p>And that girl who I tried to be friends with, well guess what, now she steals all of my friends. Like the shy girl who I sit with, yeah, girl who I tried to be friends with is constantly buffing to her about how cute her story is, etc.</p>
<p>I’m just so lost. It feels like every year I try to be more social, get more friends, I only get punched in the face.</p>