Horrified by Co-Ed Bathrooms

<p>I graduated from a LAC which had some co-ed bathrooms in the co-ed dorms (the school had a mix of different housing options from single sex dorms, co-ed dorms by floor, co-ed dorms with mixed floors). I lived on a totally mixed floor and was the only dissenting voice during the co-ed vs. single sex bathroom vote at the beginning of the school year. As a result, we had single sex bathrooms in my dorm section. (The vote was anonymous, so no one knew the results or who/how many voted which way) Don’t get me wrong, I LOVED living in a co-ed floor, just not sharing a shower/toliet area. And, I should mention, my LAC was a great “fit”. So, you can hate co-ed bathrooms and “fit” very well with a school. (Note: I thought Vassar was too vigorous in its defense of all co-ed dorms when I visited and probably wouldn’t fit with the school. My LAC was more like, grumblegrumble (among the co-ed voters) sure whatever makes everyone comfortable, that’s what will do.)</p>

<p>If it’s no big deal, then why do gyms, restaurants, airports, office buildings etc typically have single gender bathrooms? I acknowledge that there may be a practical need to have them esp in older dorms that were built with one bathroom per floor but if I were an architect I’d see no reason to engineer them in. </p>

<p>Why aren’t the gym / sports facilities (locker rooms, etc) coed if it’s no big deal?</p>

<p>As DeskPotato pointed out, back in the ‘70s, (19’ not 18’), co-ed bathrooms seemed to be the rage. I don’t know if it was a political statement about the proletariat throwing off the shackles of their imperialist oppressors from Koehler or if we just wanted to shock our parents. I do know that within a few weeks it was all a big non-event; showers and toilets had their own doors so you could handle your hygienic and bodily functions in private and I never saw an undergrad at the communal sinks brushing his/her teeth in the nude. Looking back on it, co-ed bathrooms does feel like a solution in search of a problem.</p>

<p>Of course, none of this helps the OP. He is coming from a comparatively modest society and he will be faced with a constant barrage of actions and attitudes that are going to be in conflict with his background. His off-hand observations about Speedos and bikinis has me wondering if coming to the US for college is really a good move. I think he should strongly consider how this culture shock will potentially negatively impact his ability to succeed at a typical American university. If you’re constantly going to be offended by your surroundings how are you going to be able to do well in class? But remember, it’s all relative, many South Americans and Europeans find Americans to be somewhat prudish.</p>

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I would guess, and it is a guess, that 95+% of the college cases we are discussing are old dorms that were orginally all one sex dorms or all one sex floor/suite/wings that are now mixed … so the choices are coed bathrooms, make kids travel, or lose rooms to add bathrooms … so you end up with lots of coed bathrooms. This is not an issue for me or my kids at all so I have to admit I haven’t noticed in the new dorms we toured if they have paired bathrooms or shared bathrroms … I will notice from now on.</p>

<p>Restaurents, gyms, etc were built to serve two sexes and started with two of everything … in general … in fact one of the gyms at my school had orginal been built as the “Women’s gym” and did have a funky but non-shared bathroom set-up if I remember correctly.</p>

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<p>You might want to open up your mind a little bit also, and realize that the preferences and sensibilities of others who are not like you are equally valid and require no explanation or defense.</p>

<p>In the case of the co-ed bathrooms in my dorm, these were old women’s dorms constructed as singles off a long corridor with a communal bathroom. Because the floors were coed by room (sure, they could have been coed by floor, but many people liked to choose rooms in groups of friends which included both men and women and preferred it this way), the communal bathrooms were coed for the convenience of the residents.</p>

<p>Not a political statement, just an architectural feature.</p>

<p>I believe that in the last few years they have reconfigured the hallways into suites that have bathrooms in the suites, more like the dorms that were originally men’s dorms.</p>

<p>I lived in a dorm with that setup my freshman year (a private bathroom with toilet, sink, and shower in one room inside the suite) and actually much preferred the large, communal bathroom we had on the halls my upperclass years, notwithstanding the loss of some privacy. Why? Because there was almost never a time when I couldn’t use the sink, toilet, or shower when I needed to. I didn’t have to wait for someone else to get out of the shower before I could use the sink.</p>

<p>Obviously, if people are uncomfortable, they don’t have to choose to go to the school, and if I’d known about this possibility in advance, I probably would have been distressed thinking about it. But I’m glad I didn’t rule out the school over this feature.</p>

<p>there are many schools that don’t have “co-ed” bathrooms. you don’t have to go to a single sex school to have single sex bathrooms.</p>

<p>As a female in a coed dorm (and a coed room) I agree it’s matter of choice. What suits one won’t suit another and in an inclusive society individual’s should not be forced to adapt to someone else’s ‘norm’. I prefer coed dorms and am entirely comfortable with coed bathrooms, often it’s just a matter of practicality. But I would respect the view of anyone who felt differently.</p>

<p>I hope to find a coed set up when I come to study in the US.</p>

<p>Reading this and other threads, it does seem though that our dorm dress codes are more relaxed than yours. It’s not unusual here to see guys in the corridors or bathroom in their boxers and girls in pjs, nighties or even panties and vest top or bra. I’ll need to make sure I bring a robe!</p>

<p>Shazz</p>

<p>MIT has coed bathrooms and I haven’t really found that to be a problem. Granted, we don’t have blatant urinals and instead have doors to each of the toilets and showers in my dorm. (for most other dorms, it’s stalls)</p>

<p>Some people are asking what the point (beyond practicality) of co-ed bathrooms are these days. At my school, they are part of acknowledging that the gender binarary is a construct that does not work for everyone. I know a lot of trans, genderqueer, and other LGBTQ students who feel MUCH more comfortable in gender neutral bathrooms (which is what we call them, not co-ed. That’s the point – they aren’t co-ed, they’re non-generded). </p>

<p>That said, it’s completely legitimate to not be comfortable with that set-up for a number of reasons, and I don’t think it’s bad to have it be a criteria for your selection. That said, make sure you (OP, or whoever) look closely into each school. Wesleyan is a pretty liberal school where many people really get behind the gender-netural concept politically, but most dorms still have a mix of gender-netural and gendered bathrooms on each floor or in each dorm. So make sure the “co-ed” bathroom thing will actually be a problem before dismissing a school (as it apparently would be, for instance, at Vassar).</p>