<p>We need some advice here .</p>
<p>Our first child is going to college about 2000 miles away. We are deciding whether to fly or drive to move him to college in August. We are wondering how you took your son or daughter to colleges, and what are the experiences and lessons learnt.... Thanks in advance!</p>
<p>Regards,
midwestDad</p>
<p>Every year there are numerous threads on this subject. A search may yield better results, but here is my method (2500 miles):
Fly. Rent a car. Order sheets and towels from Penneys to be delivered to the catalog desk. Spend a day at Target, BBB, WalMart, KMart. Watch upperclassmen help move him in. Stay for Parent Orientation, but fly home immediately afterward. Plan next trip for graduation weekend.</p>
<p>We drove out freshman year - about 1800 miles. We dropped him off and helped him move in before his orientation trip and we tacked on a week’s vacation making our way back home. He flies back and forth at Christmas and Summer. Freshman summer he stored his belongings in a store and lock and then went into an apartment for sophomore year so his “stuff” is no longer a cartin’ and haulin’ issue.</p>
<p>We mailed 5 boxes of dorm equipment in late August. Shipping was ~$25.00 per box x 5= $125.) D is choosey about coordinating bedding, art posters and accessories, so we shopped at our leisure over summer. Packed 2 large suitcases for orientation program. Flew out. She did her program for a week, then moved into permanent dorm, fetched boxes from student mail center, and eveeeentually she unpacked.</p>
<p>She packs and moves boxes to on-campus storage each spring. One parent goes out in September to help her lug boxes back to dorm.</p>
<p>S attends a school abt 1500 miles away; we flew out a few days before his move-in day and rented a car, and then spent some time not only shopping out there but also exploring the campus and surrounding area (btw, S has Asperger’s so becoming more familiar with his surroundings at a slower pace before the move-in was very helpful for him). There were 2 adults besides S so we could each bring some of his clothing and personal belongings in our checked luggage. We purchased most of what he needed besides clothes either in advance from a Bed Bath & Beyond (we could order from a local store and then pick up our order after we arrived from a store near his college), or purchased it from a nearby Target after we arrived. We also held off on bringing some of his winter clothing, and shipped that later in the fall. </p>
<p>Biggest lesson learned: they really don’t need half of what you think they do.</p>
<p>Both kids went to schools 1500-1800 miles away. Drove out in kid’s car (small toyotas), flew back. Remaining years they drove themselves from wherever they were that summer.</p>
<p>Son or daughter?</p>
<p>I also have found that they don’t need nearly as much as they think they do. My d. actually flew alone to college and handled it without my help. A lot of belongings, like heavy winter clothing, can be shipped later from home. Now that airlines are charging for luggage, it might be more cost-effective to go that route – pack for September weather, and send a package in early October. </p>
<p>I asked the gender because girls seem to think they need a lot more than boys – though it might be different if you have a son involved in a sport requiring special equipment. But other than that – just the number of pairs of shoes owned can make a radical difference. At any given time, my son owns 2 pairs of shoes; daughter has enough stock to open her own retail shoe store. And yes, I have mailed out boxes full of shoes to d.</p>
<p>Do keep in mind that wherever your kid attends school, there are retail stores nearby. You can use Google maps to scout the area in advance to figure out the nearest malls, etc. No use buying a lot of stuff only to have to carry it out – so hold off on buying dorm room stuff.</p>
<p>For S, we shipped a couple boxes of bulky stuff (bedding, winter clothes, books). S flew alone with a carry-on (summer clothes) and his laptop. Done. He goes to a rural school, no car. Did not shop when he got there. Lived in dorms and had a meal plan, so what else did he need?S travels light and lives like a monk. (Friends enter his room and say, “Dude, where’s your stuff?!”) His laptop is his one essential. And his camera. A few clothes.
(People have too much junk. Think about it–the immigrants came here with one bag. . .)</p>
<p>D was a different story. She drove her small car (Dad went with her and flew back since she was keeping the car) and barely fit in all her stuff. She HAD to have a microwave and a coffee pot for her room. A funky lamp. Sports equipment. And too many clothes, etc.
And still, she noticed that other girls moving in seemed to have twice as much stuff! </p>
<p>S’s campus has summer storage, D’s does not. I think D is getting together with a group of friends to rent a storage unit for this summer so she doesn’t have to haul everything back.</p>
<p>2000 miles is too far for us to drive. However, two of my kids went to school about 8 hours away. I would rent a car/van and we would drive there, unload, then drop of the car at the airport because it was a one way rental, and fly home. Coming home, I would fly there, rent the car on a one way basis from the airport, and drive kid and stuff home. That way I could do it in a day with just one long trip in the car, and yet save on airline tickets since only I would be flying there or back.</p>
<p>Oh forgot we followed kid ‘car’ out year 2. I doubt it’s ever coming back because it almost didn’t make it up and down the mountains. Actually sent a motorcycle cop by the side of the pass near the top into peals of laughter…</p>
<p>BBandB has that fabulous service where you shop in your local store and pick up at the one closest to the college. We didn’t have to use it because the kids are within driving distance but have heard it is fabulous!</p>
<p>We flew with a daughter…3000 miles away…Southwest. We each had two large suitcases, a carryon and one other thing (I had the instruments, she had the computer). We looked like the Beverly Hillbillies when we piled up all the bags in front of the rental counter. We ordered all the big “stuff” from BBB…mattress pad, pillow, desk lamp, etc and just picked it up at the BB and Beyond near DD’s campus. We made a trip to Staples where we bought a cheap printer, all the cables and surge protectors, and a wireless mouse/keyboard. Went to Target and got a small TV and a microwave. The four suitcases…one was linens only (sheets, preferred blanket, towels), two held clothes (she was going to a warm weather climate…that was a good thing), and one was “supplies”…things like school supplies (small stuff), pictures, decorations, etc. </p>
<p>She is returning home after graduation…pretty much the same way. She will ship her books (too heavy for the baggage). We will have six suitcases for her stuff (three travelers). She will NOT bring back the linens (heck, they’ve been there for four years), TV, microwave, printer, etc…we told her to sell it or give it away. She will be bringing back clothing and some personal items (pictures, etc). I hope we can fit the six suitcases into our car trunk on the way home from the airport!!!</p>
<p>^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^</p>
<p>Smartly done … other than she should have sold some of those books.</p>
<p>Our son’s move 3000 miles away in fall of 2008 was very similar to Thumper’s description. Our family of four all flew on Southwest Airlines, and each of us checked two suitcases (all containing S’s stuff) and carried our own weekender bags onboard. After we arrived on campus, we bought his bedding at Linens & Things, and office supplies at Staples.</p>
<p>The first summer, he stored his belongings at his GF’s parent’s house. This summer he is staying on campus, moving into a furnished apartment. Don’t know if he’ll ever actually move back home!</p>
<p>Looks like you are getting good advice…one thing my SIL recommended that I think was invaluable…After you leave your child at college and BEFORE you return home–do something special as a couple for at least a couple of days…your marriage will truly benefit…and it seemed to “soften” the emotional reaction to coming back home to the empty room.
APOL-a mom</p>
<p>We’re a military family, so we’ve done numerous 2000+ mile road trips. If you are not used to doing it, it can be very tiring which is not a great way to arrive at college. I am used to doing it but if at all possible, I fly these days. </p>
<p>APOL, I like that idea. I don’t think the timing will work for us but maybe a weekend away soon after coming home would work as well. Thank you for sharing that.</p>
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<p>This is exactly my plan. I am a picky shopper. I also never get to shop, and so I want to be able to enjoy it rather than rush it. The three of us are flying Southwest, so we will have six free “bags” (and I’m pretty sure Southwest allows them to be boxes). That should cover everything, but I might mail out a box or two of toiletries and school supplies. I probably won’t shop at all while I am there. I prefer it that way. Considering a) it’s not costing me anything to ship luggage via Southwest and b) the cost of living is considerably cheaper here, this is actually a great plan.</p>
<p>When we moved D 3000 miles we did just what oregonian mom did. And in general boys don’t need/bring much – compared to girls, that is. My bet is you can pack all his stuff and between carry-on and checked-on luggage two people (meaning you and him) can bring all the necessities. If a few more of you are going, all the better. You can buy whatever you forget once you get to the school. No need to bring his winter wardrobe, mail that later. Ditto with any but the most essential books.</p>
<p>Keep in mind that books & DVDs can be mailed at the cheapest rate, as media mail. That option can also potentially be very slow – so not good for anything that will be needed right away – but its a good option for kids who think they need to take their personal libraries with them wherever they go.</p>
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