<p>My family and most parents of HS classmates were in favor of sending kids as far away as possible as part of the college experience and to further the refining of maturation of their young adults. </p>
<p>If anything, commuting to college was perceived as an effective “continuation of high school” and it really showed in the differences between commuters from home and those living away/those living in their own apartments away from parents/family.</p>
<p>Do you know what the issue is? If it is financial, no argument in the world is going to help (blood from a stone). If it is cultural, as someone up thread suggested, it might be possible to ease into it. Spend so much time on campus or gong back and forth to campus that decision to move there seems obvious. If it is just plain stubbornness, the best thing you can do is be as mature and logical as you can in your arguments. If you blow up, you reinforce the notion that you’re not emotionally ready to be treated like an adult. Good luck. Some parents can be swayed. Others can’t.</p>
<p>First you should have chosen a school at least 100 miles away so they will have no choice. If you are withing commute distance from your school I can why they would rather keep you home. What’s the point paying for a dorm/appartment when you are so close. If you really want to just get out well just get a job while in school and pay your own dorm/app fees.</p>
<p>If the OP’s parents have a problem with her living in the dorm, they would even less likely agree to her attending a distant school in the first place. As she already brought up in her post, the issue, to her understanding, is not financial. Her parents are not objecting to the cost of the dorms, but rather to, perhaps, the thought that a girl should live away from home in the college environment with all sorts of connotations attached. </p>
<p>Ordinarylives brought up the great point that you should look to the source of the reluctance. What is it exactly that your parents are most worried about? If you can tell us the reason, people here can better provide you with possible counterarguments.</p>
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I don’t know whether happymomof1 is correct about who’s in the majority, but I think that her point was that dorming being a huge and significant part of the college experience may be a bit overrated.</p>
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I could be wrong, but I also thought that depended on which college you attend and how active you become in organizations and campus life? </p>
<p>I’m planning on dorming this fall due to cultural objections as well. I would do as calla1 suggested, but be ready to be accepting if your parents are still opposed.
Like someone onces told me, “There’s no way that college can be as bad as HS.” No matter what happens, nearly everyone enjoys their college experience, no matter what it seems like initially 
Commuting doesn’t mean that you can’t get involved or be social.
Best of luck! :)</p>
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<p>While the above is prudent and common sense, I wouldn’t say blowing up or crying is necessarily a sign someone’s not being mature like an adult. </p>
<p>If that’s the case, that’s holding a high schooler to much higher standards than behavior I’ve observed in many corporate offices…especially from the higher ups. </p>
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<p>I was thinking more along the lines of learning how to self-manage oneself in an environment away from close daily parental supervision and learning how to solve problems without always having parents jump in to rescue the young adult child.</p>
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True, but that threshold doesn’t have to begin at college, though that’s the most common threshold in this society. I suppose it would depend on the culture.</p>
<p>Is the OP around? I would love to hear your thoughts.</p>
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This is true. Going Greek is what made college for me, although I’m fully aware that it’s not for everyone. A lot of my fellow commuters got very involved in campus media outlets, student government or religious organizations. And some kids who lived in the dorms only came out of their rooms for class and meals and went home every single weekend. I told S1 when he went away to find his people and college would be a blast. He found them among fellow sports broadcasting majors and his experience has been great so far.</p>
<p>Agreeing with much of what others have written…</p>
<p>1) the parents have no intention of paying for a dorm when she can commute. this could be an affordability issue (no extra money to pay for R&B), or simply a position that they don’t waste money on what they perceive to be a luxury or unneeded expense.</p>
<p>2) the parents didn’t permit her to apply to schools that were further away so that dorming wouldn’t be an issue. Obviously, if the girl had applied to such schools, she’d be leaning towards them right now. Her parents aren’t going to go along with idea of now applying to schools that are further away just so she will have to dorm. </p>
<p>3) the parents associate “dorm life” with partying and “hook ups”. They’re imagining future Facebook postings of pics of their D hanging on to some guy with an array of red cups in the background.</p>
<p>4) The idea that the student should pay for the R and B herself isn’t reasonable. That’s too much money. Besides, the parents may take the position that if she can afford to “waste” money on dorms then she can use that same money towards her tuition, instead. </p>
<p>As mentioned before, “going away to college” isn’t done by most college-bound students. Most families simply CAN NOT afford it and we all know that FA doesn’t cover those costs unless you’re attending one of the better schools with good aid. The millions of kids with good, but not top, stats are likely not going to get accepted into the schools with great aid…hence the need to commute. There’s a reason that many states scatter regional public universities in nearly every well-populated county. </p>
<p>Because many people here on CC either have the funds to pay for college or have high stats children who can get accepted to the schools that will throw money at them (need based or merit based), we sometimes forget that there are far more 18 years olds with 1500-1700 SATs who will not be “going away” to college unless their parents are footing the bill.</p>