How do I warm my parents up to the idea of me going far away for college?

Sorry, but you looking at their paystubs and bank-statements does not qualify you to determine what they can/should pay for.

They likely have OTHER plans for their money…such as paying the household bills, saving, funding retirement…and paying a reasonable price for your college.

Oh…and no, your dad doesn’t get ‘more say’ just because he earns more…marriages don’t work that way.