<p>In the Yale Committee Room, also known as "The Room of Broken Dreams" there are a dozen or so people sorting through a pile of applications, shredding every few 2400s just for fun, pulling an application out of the 1900-2000 pile to accept, finding the child of two legacies to defer, and eliminating every third person with a hard to pronounce name.
With the applications that are left over, readers read the opening and closing paragraphs of each essay, check to see if the teacher recommendations are over a page in length, and look for a specific correlation between number of ECs and SAT scores, known as the Coefficient of Social Life. Those applications that do not pass those rigorous three criteria are rejected, except every fifth; they are deferred.
The remainders, about 1200, and pinned up on the walls of the Skull and Bones lair. The Bonesmen then fire paintball guns at the applications. If at the end of the firing session the name can still be made out, the applicant is accepted. If the Bonesmen make it so that less people are accepted than the required number, the admissions personnel select the lowest SAT scorer, the highest SAT scorer, the one with least ECs, the one with most ECs, the one with the funniest name (John Longdick, for instance), and the ones with semi-original essays from the rejected pole to accept to fulfill numbers.
Yale admissions is a party. They even needed more people to be on staff this year. That looking for a funny name was just becoming too tedious.</p>
<p>If this is true, and I get rejected, I want my $75 (or was it $60?) back.</p>
<p>Roflwaffles! XD</p>
<p>I bet that is what they are doing secretly…behind closed doors…;)</p>
<p>…I hope I’m lucky…</p>
<p>Hard-to-pronounce names are hooks! They don’t get you rejected, they bring DIVERSITY!! :)</p>
<p>But very well done haha.</p>
<p>Lollerskates</p>
<p>I shudder to think what they spend our app fees on!</p>
<p>^^ milessmiles, I’m changing my name to Tetaniyakarajasuya Stragovichpogermanykyrgystan! ;)</p>
<p>i love this…and have sent it to all my friends who are freaking out for monday lol thanks</p>
<p>that’s not a funny name …“eliminating every third person with a hard to pronounce name”</p>
<p>u would be eliminated and rejected.</p>
<p>best post ever</p>
<p>paintball gear is MEGA expensive.</p>
<p>^ ohhhhhhhhh that’s where all the application fee money goes! :D</p>
<p>Oh come on guys. Scull and Bones is HARDLY the big deal anymore…I’ve had a good number of friends who turned them away. And I promise you that the ‘Bonesman’ have no power to influence ANY admissions decision. Trust me! I suggest you take a look at the ‘Mean Girl’ episode to see how admissions is done. Haha!! The dean giving personal audience - that will be the day!!! (PresidentDUNN I know you were kidding, but I thought it would be worthwhile to take it to another level)</p>
<p>You forget the ceremony in which Handsome Dan is led into the admissions office, and he then “marks his territory.” Those fortunate applications are auto-admits.</p>
<p>:)</p>
<p>My dad straight up told me today that if I got in, it would not be because I deserved it, but because some “pompous admissions officer” arbitrarily selected me. I honestly see no rhyme nor reason in the process.</p>
<p>‘Whom to accept’ I think it should be.</p>
<p>Actually the admissions process involves breaking into Princeton’s computer database and purging any and all applicants with a minute degree of familial relation to Princeton admission staff.</p>
<p>Star_s, that is definitely part of the process. How could they leave Handsome Dan out of it, anyway? He’s the one who makes those really tough calls.</p>
<p>okay I know this is just a joke but it’s gonna give me nightmares</p>
<p>“I shudder to think what they spend our app fees on!”</p>
<p>haha, me too… one of my friends applied to Indiana as a backup, and he got accepted… they used part of his application money to buy him a fancy scarf, and they sent it to him with a letter congratulating him on having some of the highest stats in the application pool</p>
<p>maybe yale will use our $75 to give us some tissues when we get our rejection/deferrals… lol, j/k</p>