To the OP: I think your kid is being manipulative because she wants you to get her a car.
Is the issue that you have forbidden her to own a car? or (more likely) that she expects you to provide her with one?
I got a car during my sophomore year in college, when I was living off campus. The way I got it was I went out and bought a used car. With my own money. Then I went to an insurance agent and signed up for a policy. With my own money. My parents didn’t have anything to do with it. Not only that, I was 17 years old, living in a different state from my parents, and I did have to call around to a lot of different insurance companies before I found one willing to insure a 17 year old.
My daughter attended college in NYC and still lives and works in Brooklyn & Manhattan, so neither she nor her husband own a car to this day. (She’s age 29, H. is 30).
So bottom line --you might want to simply tell her that it’s fine with you if she buys herself a car and pays all costs associated with it, including insurance.
Because no matter what you are being told, college kids get along fine without cars. And the story about the urgent need to get something bound with no place near campus to do it sounds really fishy to me. These days, most college papers are submitted electronically.
I’ve had a car on campus since I was a freshman in college. I paid for it (car, maintenance, gas, etc), parents paid my insurance (for a few years). I didn’t use it to get around campus but since I worked off-campus, it was needed.
At my undergrad, you parked way away from our dorms (like 20 minute bus ride away) and freshmen weren’t allowed to have cars. Everyone else survived fine.
(I had a car since I was technically a junior as they went by credits.)
She should be fine with an uber. I’m surprised though that there’s not somewhere on campus to get something bound…
Your D would have hated my rural LAC then as their policy due to a town ordinance prohibits first year students from bringing cars to campus/town.
And while technically first year students can get around it by parking it outside town limits, the distance and inconvenience, especially in cold weather was such it’s not worth the bother.
And public transportation around the campus/town area was extremely spotty to the point of practical uselessness.
We live in a city, but in a very suburb-like part of the city. When they were in high school, my kids had use of a family car every day, so they drove a lot. The younger one didn’t get his license until after the older one went to college, so effectively each of them had his or her own car during their last years of high school. They drove to and from school every day, and to jobs, friends, ECs, and everything else. That’s for perspective.
They both went to the same college, in a different city with a good public transportation system, and expensive parking. Neither ever had a car in college. We bought unlimited public transit passes for them for around $150-$200 per year (not a fixed price – we just automatically reloaded their cards when necessary). That, and Uber, and Zipcar, which became available to them on campus while they were in college (and which effectively let 18-year-olds and over rent cars for a few hours cheaply), and bicycles (neither rode bikes at home, but both started in college) were plenty. Neither ever asked to have a car at college.
They have both been out of college a decade or so now. One still lives in the same city, and works on the same campus. The other lives in Brooklyn, like everyone else’s kid. Neither has ever owned a car, and neither shows any sign of wanting to own a car, although either could afford one. They use public transit, Uber, bikes, and Zipcar. (One now has a housemate/partner who owns a car, but that’s only been since last June. They mainly use it to visit the partner’s parents, who live about an hour’s drive away in an area that is poorly served by public transportation.)
Re: having to bind papers. That sounds crazy to me. Over a decade ago, my kids hardly ever had to submit any work other than electronically. Who asks for bound physical copies? And, where is there a college with no Staples or Kinko’s (either of which would be able to bind something) within several miles?
And son has a car but will uber because parking at times is not worth the hassle.
Does use it to get to grocery store but has done that by bike in the past also.
The car is mainly there so he can come home to visit easily (so actually for our convenience).
And nobody binds anything. Just saying. And if you can’t wait 30 min then you didn’t plan very well.
Both Ds didn’t get cars until they had graduated college. They walked the campus, got rides with friends or used public transportation. With Uber and Lyft now available many millennials don’t see a need to have a car.
“Re: having to bind papers. That sounds crazy to me.”
Yeah, I had to specially bind moot court papers during law school, but that was law school (and 15 years ago). I wouldn’t be surprised by binding requirements for a thesis, but no one writes a thesis freshman year.
binding papers, new eyeglasses, allergy medication- this is life.
None of my kids had cars- frankly it was an expense we were not prepared to take on. I am amazed at the number of people who claim they can’t afford college but don’t mind paying car insurance, parking, plus of course the vehicle itself, for a kid living on a college campus where there is a shuttle to pretty much take the kid wherever you need to go.
We never wanted our kids to feel compelled to get into a car driven by someone who had been drinking- so for both HS and college our rule was “taxi on us if you feel you need one, no questions asked”. I think we paid for three cabs over a 12 year period??? And one zip car- kid was taking the GRE’s or something and ended up assigned to an inconvenient location.
My D is still in HS but goes to private in Boston. Due to high parking cost we also decided she did not need her own car til she got a free space in the campus lot. She uses publc transportation and Uber to get around. She has never had to wait more than 10 minutes for an Uber. But, perhaps they are not as available in your D’s location. I will say, a 70 yo friend just ditched her car, for now, and is trying to rely on public trans and Uber til the spring. She told me it takes her up to 4X’s as long to get some places, and she needs to plan for that, but she loves not having to shovel a car out. I think as others have said, your D needs to plan better.
My kid had a car at college for junior and senior year and it was totally worth it (in our specific situation). If I had to do it over again, I would have let the kid have a car for soph year too and maybe frosh year. The school had a rule of no frosh cars, but that rule was easily evaded.
We owned and insured the teenager beater car already. So cost was the same if the vehicle was at school or if it was an eyesore parked in front of our house.
The vehicle (once kid had it) was used as personal transportation and possession hauler for the long drive to campus in the fall and from campus in the spring. One summer the vehicle went between campus and the location of a summer internship which was not located in the hometown. Another summer the vehicle went to the city where a sibling's intersnhip was located. Yuge savings as compared to doing that with airplane tickets and FedEx.
Once the kid had an off-campus apartment, the vehicle was most helpful. Free/available on street parking in the student apartment district near campus. Trips to the goodwill to acquire cheap apartment furnishings. Then trips to take those furnishings back to the goodwill at graduation. Weekly trips out to Costco to buy food and supplies. Trips out to the airport to pick up/drop off family members when they came to visit. Used by those family members while they were in-town visiting. During graduation, the vehicle shuttled classmates, siblings, parents, grandparents from campus to apartment to aiports to wherever. Plus, the car was used for the occasional out-of-town trip on weekends to go camping or see a concert in a nearby city.
The kid would have survived college with just a bike or a skate board and Uber. But the car made way more sense.
Facing issue with one of my kids. Freshman year went OK without car, but may need for soph year.
Considering moving off campus to a frat house that is not a short walk. Bus can run ever 30-60 mins,
so advanced planning would be needed. Very busy kid, varsity athlete, engineering major.
But I found that by moving to the frat house he would save enough $ to pay for a car, so I told him OK if he moves.
Dorms are very expensive !
Location is important, had a kid in a major city, where subway, taxi, uber were all option so no thought of a car.
He transferred to a more rural school, and now has more effort to get around, but as a city kid he does not like to drive and finds ways (bum rides, long walks, long bus rides but mostly stays on campus). In a large uni, sometimes all you need is on campus. Student health center will call you a cab if they need to refer you to an off campus doc.
A bicycle or scooter is usually a lot faster than a car for short distances. I used one for years for groceries, errands, etc. and you can park close to your destination. You can get just about anything through amazon or mail-order delivery. I really don’t see the need for a car unless the campus is rural or very difficult to get to, or the student has job or internship commitments that require them to travel some distance.
Cars are not necessary, most don’t have them and get around just fine. She’s giving conflicting information. Seems like she’s trying to guilt trip you into getting a car. High traffic areas usually have the most ubers available. You’re less likely to have access to ubers in low traffic, rural areas. 30 minute waits are rare outside of major holidays. She should be fine with just a bike and a car. Lots of students also get scooters.
son is on a small remote campus - he has a bike or he walks. Roommate does have a car so he has access to the closest town when the roomie goes there.
FYI - if your kid is considering pledging a fraternity, then you should really not let them have a car unless you like the idea of them driving around at all hours of the nights to pick up actives at bars, deliver food, beer etc. They basically become a private taxi service.
@northwesty : Our auto insurance went way down once our kids were both in college more than 100 miles away without access to their former car, and it was barely being driven. We still insured it (until it died in my son’s junior year), but at a fraction of what it had cost when they were home.
My kids didn’t have cars until their SR year of college. Both managed just fine – S had friends with a car and D just figured things out. She had some friends who drove and did a lot of biking and walking. My nephew had a zipcar account and it was MUCH less hassle and cheaper than a car on campus. Nearly all the nieces and nephews were fine with NO cars when they were on college–they all figured out how to get where they needed to go. With Uber, Lyft and ZipCars, things are a LOT more available than back in the stone ages when we were kids. I used my bike and had BFs that drove me in their cars.
Oh yes, S bought both himself and D $7 (yes seven dollars in LA) bikes from the police auction so they could have CHEAP transportation and wouldn’t be heartbroken if their bikes were stolen. D was insulted that someone stole her chain and lock but NOT her bike (they were really pretty poor specimens of bicycles).