<p>I really like Smith, but I do like boys!
so how hard is it to meet guys?</p>
<p>umm... my sense is this depends a lot on whether you have a car. people with a car get off campus much more often. (via bus, Hampshire is 20 min and UMass/Amherst is 45 min). Also it depends on what kind of boys you're looking to meet. The boys who come to parties at Smith are often kind of sketchy, but I know girls who get drunk and hookup, and that's all they're really looking for. It also depends on how good you are at meeting guys. Basically, if you're really good at meeting guys, you should be alright, b/c they are around some. But if you're average to not good at meeting guys, you may be frustrated, b/c it's /definitely/ not like going to a coed school, and your chances to meet guys will be limited.</p>
<p>wonderful.</p>
<p>I agree with ecape. No real way to sugar coat it -- your opportunities to meet guys will be much more limited than at a co-ed school. If you're outgoing and find it easy to start conversations with guys, you can go to any number of athletic, club, music and arts events at UMass or Amherst and meet lots of guys. But if you aren't that outgoing, it can be tough.</p>
<p>Perhaps my D is more of a grind than many but, questions of being outgoing aside, she did not feel she could afford the time penalty for going to Amherst or U/Mass that often. Friday nights were sacrosanct for socializing. But the rest of the weekend was divvied up between studying and catching up on sleep. And EC's.</p>
<p>But if you're average to not good at meeting guys, you may be frustrated, ]]</p>
<p>Men are men. If you can utter more than one coherent sentence (and depending on your attractiveness or sobriety even that isnt always necessary) there are always guys at an Amherst, Hampshire, or if you like to road trip, Harvard, Tufts, Dartmouth, Williams or MIT party that will be more than happy to make you feel welcomed.</p>
<p>And contrary to popular belief they arent all drunks or after whoopee.</p>
<p>From what I have been told, being on the debate team is a great way to meet guys. The team attends debate tournaments at Harvard, etc. and most participating debate teams are very heavily guys, so the ratio is a nice change for the Smithies.</p>
<p>It is also amazing to me how many Smithies form a significant relationship with a guy they meet during JYA. One friend of my D's (a couple of years ahead of her at Smith) is now married to her JYA boyfriend from South Africa. During commencement weekend we met the British boyfriend of another good friend of hers. These two had met during the Smithie friend's JYA in London and the BF (in the "engaged to be engaged" category from what I have been told) has traveled to Smith for numerous occasions. </p>
<p>The Glee Club makes a point of partnering with male Glee Clubs (from U Penn, U Va, USNA, U Mich, ...) and the guys and gals host each other on reciprocal campus visits (including staying in their rooms :eek: -- except when at the Naval Academy, where gals were safely housed in Officers' homes, with designated escorts to pick them up for practices!)</p>
<p>In general, IMO, meeting guys at on-campus mixers is not as promising an approach as when Amherst, etc, were single-sex. In those days the Amherst guys had to travel to meet "co-eds." Now, there is some selection in terms of who travels to Smith to meet gals, and the selection criteria may not be in the direction a parent of a Smithie would relish.:rolleyes:</p>
<p>Proactivity can make a difference. But if meeting "nice" guys easily is a top priority, and you are not proactive, this aspect of Smith can be a significant challenge. Only you can decide if the other aspects of Smith more than compensate. (For my D they did.) At this point in life, focusing on becoming the person YOU are capable of being trumps linking up with a potential significant OTHER, IMO.)</p>
<p>
[quote]
Only you can decide if the other aspects of Smith more than compensate. (For my D they did.) At this point in life, focusing on becoming the person YOU are capable of being trumps linking up with a potential significant OTHER, IMO.)
[/quote]
Well said! All this talk about meeting guys makes me wish I were attending Amherst or UMass as a student. ;) I think much higher of Smithies. Certainly, getting off campus is a prerequisite to meeting guys if you attend Smith; but come on, how hard can it be for a beautiful, smart, driven, self-assured young woman to meet men? :eek: Now I get it; the men at the other schools are totally intimidated by Smith women! lol</p>
<p>"Men are men. If you can utter more than one coherent sentence..."</p>
<p>I'm really tired of that stereotype, actually. I'm reasonably outgoing (we'll say "average"), I had lots of guy friends in high school, and I think most people believe I'm at least average on the attractiveness-scale. But guys are not /that/ easy, especially when they go to coed schools where they can meet lots of girls nearby. A lot of guys are not that easy period, actually. Remember, if some sort of relationship with a guy is what you're interested in, they've got to like you enough to take the bus or hop in their car for 20 min. in order to see you on a regular basis. Considering the laziness of most college students, that's a little intimidating. I know people who do it, but I definitely have to say that the majority of straight Smithees I know do not date on a regular basis.</p>
<p>I definitely agree that if you're serious about meeting guys, some sort of off-campus club where you can see the same people enough to form friendships is probably the best way to go.</p>
<p>I'm really tired of that stereotype, ]]
if some sort of relationship with a guy is what you're interested in]</p>
<p>What stereotype? And it was a joke but still is basically true. It is easy to <em>meet</em> men at a party. I said nothing about what would come of it. Youre talking about having a relationship, which is an entirety different matter.</p>
<p>Yeah, but I mean there is a stereotype, that men have really loose standards as to who they'll hookup with. In my experience, men aren't that different from women. I realize it was a joke. It just happens to be a stereotype I don't like to be perpetuated (not to mention anytime you say men /are/ such-and-such, you're implying women aren't). (And I don't think anyone denies it's easy to meet people at parties; I made that point in my first post. I was talking about meeting people in other contexts where you could actually get to know them being difficult.) (On the other hand though, I wouldn't encourage getting /married/ to anyone right out of college, especially not someone you just met on JYA)</p>
<p>[mean there is a stereotype, that men have really loose standards..It just happens to be a stereotype I don't like to be perpetuated]]</p>
<p>Loose standards? Perpetuate a stereotype? Gezz, where did that come from? Youre making way too much out of this, and Im not perpetuating anything. I simply meant, guys being guys, one will most likely try to start up a conversation at a social function. Hooking-up, and standards to do so, never occurred to me when I was thinking of how easy it is to meet men and have nothing to do with the original question.</p>
<p>The op asked how hard it was to meet guys, <em>period</em> Theres no mention of extracurricular activity. My statement regarding the origional question is correct; if you go to a Smith party, or a party at any college, you will probably meet guys.</p>
<p>Lets let this go</p>
<p>
[quote]
The op asked how hard it was to meet guys, <em>period</em> Theres no mention of extracurricular activity. My statement regarding the origional question is correct; if you go to a Smith party, or a party at any college, you will probably meet guys.
[/quote]
</p>
<p>Why do some tend to read more into what is in front of their eyes? I think RLT is absolutely correct, if you go to a Smith party, or any other college party, you will prbably meet guys. Why is that so wrong?</p>
<p>Personal experience (and everyone's is different) -- I met several guys at parties, Starbuck's, playing squash and salsa night at the Iron Horse. I thought a few were worth dating and I did so, but there was no way that I had the time to put into developing what I would consider a relationship.</p>
<p>I didn't miss having a really close relationship with a guy most of the time. There were times that I did, but usually I was too busy studying or having fun to miss it that much.</p>
<p>I have to admit that I'm looking forward to JYA in Spain or Mexico because of the reports from returning students regarding the men they have met. :-) </p>
<p>Hey Smithie, what do you think about this topic?</p>
<p><strong>except when at the Naval Academy, where gals were safely housed in Officers' homes, with designated escorts to pick them up for practices!</strong></p>
<p>However, when the Naval Academy came to Smith, there was competition among Smithies to house the male cadets in their rooms. :-)</p>
1 Like
<p>
[quote]
but there was no way that I had the time to put into developing what I would consider a relationship.
[/quote]
</p>
<p>This, indeed, I think is the bigger problem than actually meeting guys.</p>
1 Like
<p>This, indeed, I think is the bigger problem than actually meeting guys.]] </p>
<p>I agree. There is enough opportunity to meet/hook up with guys, more or less depending on who your friends are, whether you can get to a car, how much work you have, what kind of ECs you do, etc. But if you're like me, and you're looking for a real relationship, not a one night stand, its going to be tough, I'm not going to lie to you. If you look forward to college as the place to meet your future hubby, you might be dissappointed. However, if you want to just have fun with fellas, then you'll be happy enough.</p>
<p>but what if you want something inbetween a "real relationship" and one night stand.....</p>
<p>but what if you want something inbetween a "real relationship" and one night stand.....]]</p>
<p>A pet?</p>
<p><em>LOL</em> I hear ferrets are cute and cuddly!</p>