How is this essay?

[Azhir]

<p>Hey guys,</p>

<p>I'm just an average student hoping to get into a good college and really wanted to focus on writing excellent essays since my GPA and SAT are nothing special. </p>

<p>My essay is about an experience while traveling to Southeast Asia (Malaysia)</p>

<p>Anybody care to read and critique?</p>

[tuesdayair]

<p>sure pm to me?</p>

[stasis]

<p>i’d love to read/critique – PM me</p>

[asdfjkl1]

<p>Sure, I’ll help! =]</p>

[Savs]

<p>I’ll help. PM me if you’d like.</p>

[CCFanatic]

<p>Essay-tize me Cap’n</p>