how likely is it for nerds to date?

<p>iceburns, but you have alot of friends and a life, right?</p>

<p>omg, this is getting pretty ridiculous!</p>

<p>First of all, I agree with brokenw1ngs.</p>

<p>Secondly, personality helps to shape one's view of physical attractiveness. If someone is initially very cute, but then you find out they're a jerk, they start to look ugly. Likewise, if someone is just 'ok' but then has a great personality (sense of humor, sweet) then they can look cuter...</p>

<p>And no guy reading this thread should take iceburns288's advice... I almost think he's being sarcastic. Any girl who's attracted to a guy who treats her like crap has major self-esteem issues and isn't ideal as a partner in a relationship... unless you want to treat her like crap all the time, in which case I guess she is ideal.</p>

<p>I for one am only interested in guys that are nice to me from the beginning.</p>

<p>Seriously people. Have we all forgotten the time-proven method of becoming really really rich to get really realy hot women? Be a venture a capitalist and you will have women in all six inhabited continents. You will also get a diverse amount of STDs, but wear them like trophies.</p>

<p>"And no guy reading this thread should take iceburns288's advice... I almost think he's being sarcastic. Any girl who's attracted to a guy who treats her like crap has major self-esteem issues and isn't ideal as a partner in a relationship... unless you want to treat her like crap all the time, in which case I guess she is ideal."</p>

<p>I see from your last sentence that you are a girl, correct (safe assumption)? Read what I said- girls don't admit it. You may be in the minority (I'd say 90-95% of girls follow this pattern) but if not you actually will do this. I'd still say you are in the majority despite your denial, not only due to raw statistics but girls will continue to deny it even if I've seen it happen first hand. Let me provide you with an example.</p>

<p>I went to Germany with a few friends this summer. We hung out with a group of German high school students there, and two of them were interested in one of my friends. One was very nice to her, really sweet to her, etc. The other was kinda nice, but also occasionally made fun of her (just playing around) and didn't really seem to care about her. Guess which one she ended up hooking up with for the rest of the trip? The one that wasn't that nice to her.
Even better, when I talked about this phenomena in front of her, she told me how wrong I was, just like you did. Then I reminded her exactly what she did on our Germany trip and she admitted it was true. She ended up telling me she actually didn't want to get with the really nice guy because he was nice 'as a friend.' Which brings me to the topic of the friend zone, but that is another topic altogether... :p</p>

<p>^ I don't know about treating girls like crap would create a stable relationship, but on the other hand, I've observed scenarios that iceburn described. Some girls, not all, some how could not get over dudes who treated them like craps.</p>

<p>Newton, if you're smart and nice, why aren't those the traits you value most in a girl, rather than hot? If "hot" is the primary thing you're looking for, that'll come across. Any smart, nice "hot" girls will go running the other way because they want to be valued for things other than their looks. I go to a top school where plenty hot/smart girls exist, and they often complain about how they're treated as objects because they're pretty! The only girls left will be those who are superficial and don't care if you judge them on looks...and chances are they wont' look past a nerdy exterior. </p>

<p>Stop putting so much credence in looks. Just because we're biologically inclined to do something doesn't mean that we should do it. Our bodies tell us to eat lots and lots of sugar and fat so we don't die in a famine...but a lot of us resist that these days, don't we? It is SO possible to move past your "biological" urges...don't give us this BS about giving into your Id. That's absurd. If you're smart enough to be in college, you're smart enough to force yourself to look past your base instincts and value a person as a person, and not as a sex object/baby oven.</p>

<p>Haha, I love that you used the term "baby oven"!</p>

<p>im not sure about being a complete jerk part? but im thinking you mean teasing some of the ladies?
Sadly looks are the initial thing you have to past by, then moving into your personality.</p>

<p>i'm a nerd, but i'm a girl. i don't know if i look like a nerd tho.</p>

<p>
[quote]
im not sure about being a complete jerk part? but im thinking you mean teasing some of the ladies?
Sadly looks are the initial thing you have to past by, then moving into your personality.

[/quote]
</p>

<p>yeah I agree with that. Sure, personality is important, but looks are more important for initial attraction.</p>

<p>Iceburn is spot on.</p>

<p>Be the big ... in your social settings, over exert your manly confidence, act uninterested (it's a whole game of value. You can read up on it with help from google), and you will appeal to the ladies.</p>

<p>Being good looking is also a huge advantage. I'm probably not as
good as iceburn at the whole jerk routine, but Ive been told by just about every girl I know that I'm "hot," and that helps me a lot when messing with the ladies.</p>

<p>And yes, girls will never admit it (whether they realize it or not I do not know), but iceburn has applied his intelligence very well and you can too.</p>

<p>But of course I am just preaching to the choirof men. Every girl is going to be like "Nuh uh!" :P</p>

<p>i know some nerds from my school that are so... confident that it's hot ;)</p>

<p>but then it gets to arrogance which is annoying</p>

<p>Guys love to toss around the idea that being a jerk to women gets them noticed. It's not the being-a-jerk part that's attractive to most women, it's the self-confidence. If you're a straight up ..., you'll get the sort of people who are into that (if you really want them.) Other normal women won't be so impressed - you'll just be too self-absorbed by that point to notice.</p>

<p>The trick is, don't take advice from those guys here who brag about how successful they are. If they have to talk about it on collegeconfidential chances are they're just feeling insecure.</p>

<p>It's my understanding that at 30 or 40 the dating scene completely reverses. Suddenly, all those girls who were "2 kewl" for the "nerdy" guys come running (2-3 kids in tow, no doubt, since Biker Bruno certainly isn't paying child support) looking to those same "nerdy" guys that they rejected oh so many times before in the hopes of finding a meal tick-- er, "beloved husband" to help them live an easier/better life, etc etc.</p>

<p>Then it's the guy's turn to do the turning down, heh heh.</p>

<p>Truth is, it's all looks and game. Not "inner qualities"-that's some hollywood B.S. You need to look good, and most guys can. If your face isn't busted, you just need some good clothes, contacts, and a haircut. Also get a tan, hit the gym. Looks are largley controllable. I actually think the way you walk, talk and act is harder to change. Point is, do you want to try to become some contrived d-bag? Didn't think so.</p>

<p>I've dated hot girls, and I'm not hot-but I am "cool" to some extent. It never lasted. And it's not worth it.</p>

<p>Honestly, I've never really gone for those HOTTTT guy types. Am I attracted to them physically? Sure, but generally I do go for the dorkier guys. I don't want some d-bag frat type who treats me like crap-- tried that one time and it just p*ssed me off more than anything. The dorky ones who can talk to me about like, Star Wars and Doctor Who, and we can watch random movies like Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind together, those are the ones I like. As long as they shower regularly and aren't just straight up ugly (most people aren't) and aren't REALLLLLY awkward all the time, I'm game. The awkward part is what gets me most of the time-- if you're confident enough to talk about playing Magic the gathering and not be embarrassed about it, that's nice. If you're that weird kid in the corner who never really talks to anyone and always wearing ill-fitting clothes and has gross hair, um yeah not so much.</p>

<p>
[QUOTE]
how often do hot girls ever go dating with nerds - those with no life, few friends, lack social skills and may be shy, but get good grades, are nice, and are funny in an immature way?

[/QUOTE]
</p>

<p>How often do hot girls date guys who fit this description? Never. The good grades, niceness and funniness are irrelevant.</p>

<p>what's your definition of HOT?</p>

<p>"he good grades, niceness and funniness are irrelevant."
The niceness actually would be a plus, but how nice is a person who doesn't have friends or a social life. Who is the person being nice to?</p>

<p>The OP described his humor as "immature." Assuming such humor consists of things like fart jokes, sex jokes, dead baby jokes, etc. , that would be a big negative to most females (Somehow males often have more tolerance of that kind of humor).</p>

<p>Having a good sense of humor -- the kind that women appreciate -- would be a positive. But I'd think that if the OP's sense of humor were wonderful, he'd have more of a social life.</p>

<p>"The niceness actually would be a plus, but how nice is a person who doesn't have friends or a social life. Who is the person being nice to?"</p>

<p>I'd have to disagree with this. You can definitely be nice and still not have friends. Some people are polite and amiable, but they have this innate awkwardness that prevents them from really connecting with people and actually forming real friendships.</p>