How long did it take to make friends?

Student Lounge College Life
1

<p>I'm just wondering how long it took for you to:
a) meet your really good friend(s)?
b) form a "group" (for lack of a better work) of friends?</p>

<p>NOTE: Just answer the first two questions if you don't feel like reading the giant hunk of self-conscious text beneath (I want to get a good feel of how long it'll take) or be a kind soul and tell me what I'm doing wrong/if I'm overreacting :)</p>

<p>I'm a freshman in a Big Ten school. I had orientation for a week, and I'm just finished my first week of class. I'm having trouble making friends now. I've exchanged numbers with maybe 7 or 8 people? - and I was way friendlier during orientation than I normally am. As a result though, I ended up making friends with people I normally have trouble connecting with (I hesitate to label them as partiers or preps, since those are negative stereotypes and these people are nice, just not people I share much in common with). The only person I met so far that I thought I could be good friends with, I exchanged maybe 1 or 2 texts with (I was the last person to send a text). A day or two later, I texted him again and I never got a response. I hung out with my high school acquaintance once, but, it felt like I had to force myself to think of conversation topics. I'm starting to freak out now, since I rarely see people eating alone, even though I do. People are always bringing friends back, while I'm just Skyping my high school friends. All my high school friends seem to be forming friend groups and making good friends already, and two of them are already going out on dates! </p>

<p>I come from a rather large high school (my graduating class was around 1,000) and I had 2 or 3 really close friends that I kind of leeched off of for friend groups (I'm not keen on being around large groups of people and I see no need for more than a couple good friends). So, even though I'm used to being around a bunch of people I don't know, I'm not great with making friends. I'm usually pretty passive when it comes to friendship (which was why I had to ACT friendly) and rarely initiate or make plans. I rarely initiate, since I know I'm a bit strange and quirky and my personality can come off as strong, so I'm worried I'll annoy people. Still, I didn't have this much trouble in high school! Most weekends, I had plans and even some weekdays I'd have my closest friend over. There were times when I'd have to pick between 2 or 3 different events... Why is it now, I seem to be the only one without friends?</p>

<p>Sorry for writing so much! :D</p>

<p>P.S. I do plan on going to 5 or 6 call outs next week... but will they help?</p>

2

<p>Get involved on campus. That’s all I have to say. Join clubs, join a sorority/fraternity, join the newspaper, join choir, do SOMETHING.</p>

3

<p>I’m also having trouble. Have made an acquaintance or two (could potentially become friends) but that’s about it. Everyone says it will definitely get better but it’s really hard.</p>

4

<p>@TylerPerry sure hope so! it’s friday night and it looks like i’m staying in. it’s nice to know i’m not alone though :)</p>

5

<p>I made friends with my suitemates instantly when I lived in the dorms last year. We pretty much found that we had similar personalities and almost similar interests, and at my school, they don’t even do a roommate questionnaire thing-it’s completely random, so it was luck that we ended up living together. We’re living together again for the upcoming school year because we clicked so well.</p>

6

<p>My “group” of friends was made within about three weeks. </p>

<p>I was pretty antisocial in high school, too. But the “leeching process” actually works quite well in the beginning of college. If you aren’t a very social person, meet someone who is and meet people with him/her. Since everyone is new, no one is “excluding” anyone yet. Of course, the trick here is meeting that one social person you can tolerate ;)</p>

<p>Remember, in the beginning, EVERYONE is looking to make friends. Good luck!</p>

<p>Also, I only met one person at orientation (didn’t even exchange information) and didn’t talk with him at all until my second year by mere coincidence! And I still made friends!</p>

7

<p>It’s difficult to say. One of my best friends I met on the first day, while other friends I have made have just occurred naturally over time. My current roommate (soph and now jr year) and I knew each other all of freshman year, but we didn’t become really good friends until late into the spring semester.</p>

<p>I joined a club, so I guess I would say I was in a group the first week of school.</p>