<p>And how many official visits is your child planning to do?
Are you going to accept all 5?</p>
<p>We just finished our unofficial visit to 7 colleges.
My D is actively communicating with 4 schools and casually talking with 10 other schools including LAC.</p>
<p>She got two official visit offers from two of her dream schools so far and hopefully number 3 offer on the way.
Although, we can accept upto 5 official visit offers from those D1 schools, I don't know that we should accept all 5 offers just in order to secure her spot when she already got two most important official visit offers for her. Next fall will be really busy with sport, finalizing high school GPA with good grade and application preparation. Having trip on every weekend would be a burden. What is your advice?</p>
<p>I don't know that we should keep communicating with other schools that she casually talking with if she can't commit official visit offers from those schools. Is this time to drop those communication? Or should we still keep that line open and trying to receive their official visit offers just in case?
Basically if we turn down their official visit offer, it clearly indicate that we are not that into the school that much and they will stop recruiting process, right?</p>
<p>There are definitely two sides to this. I think that if/when your daughter has chosen her five officials, she should immediately inform the other schools that she has commited to her five officials. Schools usually invite twice as many recruits for official visits as they have spots for, so she can still indicate to those coaches that if anything changes she will let them know, just in case it doesn’t work out at any of the other schools. That way the coaches can move forward with offering officials to other recruits on their list. </p>
<p>I also think that if your daughter has a clear top choice school and gets an offer that works for her, she doesn’t need to take all five officials. My daughter also has a jam packed fall, with two sports that consume weekends. Fitting in five official visits will be next to impossible. I know some people will say that athletes should take all five OVs, you might change your mind about a school after visiting. But I think if you have done the research and learned all you can about a school, coach and team, you can safely make a choice without visiting 5 schools, especially if you have done unofficial visits. </p>
<p>As far as communicating with other schools, unless your daughter really wants to attend those schools and would accept an official visit offer, there is no reason to continue with the recruiting process. Those schools are somebody’s dream school also, better to let the coach know so they can focus their efforts on the recruits who really want to go to school there. </p>
<p>And yes, if you turn down an official visit offer you are telling the coach that the school is not in your top five schools. There is a reason that the NCAA only allows five official visits. Kids can only attend one school.</p>
<p>Personally, I would go to as many officials (5) and unofficials (no limit) as possible without interfering with her school, sports or family life. Gathering as much information and meeting as many people (coaches/deans) as possible is an important part of the process. </p>
<p>If she has made up her mind, and verbally commits…then she needs to cease and desist visiting other schools.</p>
<p>fishymom, I disagree that not accepting an OV right away communicates complete disinterest. Coaches know this decision can unfold slowly and unpredictably. </p>
<p>Some kids can only fit in 2-3 visits during September and October. If none of those visits results in a match (from either the student or the schools’ side) the student can contact other schools and make later OVs. It’s possible to make an OV after Nov 1st, get a preread from admissions, get a likely letter/verbal/LOI, and apply EA/ED with a bit of a slide in the Nov 1st application deadline. Of course this only works in cases where the student/athlete is at/near the top of their sport and is a match for academic admission. </p>
<p>My point is, while there is some urgency in making OVs to the top 2-3 school choices, and these should be selected very carefully to maximize the chances of a happy match for everyone involved, it’s not necessarily the end of the world if the student wishes to make more visits a bit later in the process. Travel and visits can be extremely stressful, and each kid should work to evaluate their college opportunities, but should also try to “enjoy” their senior year. Don’t miss Homecoming, high school sports competitions with their long-time teammates, and too many classes, in an effort to knock on every door.</p>
<p>River, I meant that if you have already committed to take official visits at your top five schools, not accepting an offer at another school indicates that the school is not in your top five. I certainly don’t think it communicates complete disinterest, especially if the student still has not committed to all five visits and needs more time to decide. And I would hedge my bets by keeping the lines of communication open with one or two schools, just in case thing don’t work out with any of the top five schools. Kids can always do an unofficial visit later in the year.</p>
<p>Although you are indeed allowed 5 official visits, several coaches have told my daughter she should try not to take more than three. Any more than that, in the opinions that have been expressed to us, is putting a drain on the student in terms of time away from school (at a time when grades are of course very important), along with the stress/fatigue of travel - along with meeting all of the other EC/athletic commitments that the student has at school. </p>
<p>As good as this advice is, my daughter has committed to 5. She is now considering paring that number down, but is having a really hard time doing that as each school whose invitation she has accepted is very appealing to her. Also, it is scary to say “no” one more time - as a parent, it is unnerving to have one’s child decline official invite offers from so many schools that I would have been thrilled for her to attend - yikes! </p>
<p>A couple of schools whose invitations she has declined have said that she should go ahead and allow them to get an academic pre-read on her, and feel free to return on an unofficial visit just in case the scheduled OVs don’t pan out/entice her…flattering to her, but I find that odd that any coach would essentially offer their program/school up as a “back up”. This is particularly surprising when the coach knows his/her school didn’t even make it onto a Top Five list, in the student’s mind. So, yes, I would normally agree that when you decline an OV invitation, that would cease the recruiting relationship with that school - however, I am being proven wrong as sometimes the coach does not want to walk away, even when the OV invitation is declined.</p>
<p>I also feel that three is more than enough, especially since the two my daughter already committed to start on Fridays! (Is this always the case? I didn’t think of it at first but now I see that unless they want to experience classes with the team, of course they have to be there on a weekday)</p>
<p>I also wonder, if you only go on three and nothing works out, don’t you still have two left if you don’t sign early? I know the scholarship money might be a lot less but if it’s a school you can get into with academic aid, that should still be a viable option, as need-based would, if that applies. I know kids on her team were going on official visits after November last year.</p>
<p>My daughter has also told a couple of coaches that she isn’t interested in their schools right now, and they’ve been gracious and left the door open should she change her mind. But it’s early still. I guess the less-sought after schools know their status and figure they take what they can when the rest don’t work out.</p>
<p>Edit: just because I feel three is more than enough doesn’t mean she won’t beg for four or even all five and I won’t let her go. In the end, all I can do is suggest.</p>
<p>Travel on Friday question: many kids choose to travel late on Saturday if their fall sport has Friday/Saturday competitions. They can arrive on campus Saturday afternoon/evening, meet with coaches and team on Sunday for whatever light practice/social event there might be, go to classes on Monday and travel home late Monday. This is not conventional, but worked for us. For fall sports, sometimes the college team is also traveling or hosting a competition Friday/Saturday, so visiting once the the team and coaches are back on campus and/or can focus on the visiting athlete, actually makes sense.</p>
<p>fishy, I don’t think I wrote very clearly. What I meant to convey is that the eventual college choice your child makes may not be in the five OV list, and coaches know that. You don’t have to tell anyone (except NCAA who will know as coaches report visits) which and how many schools your child is visiting. It’s not unheard of for a kid to not match with the first few visits and then realize one of the schools that has been waiting patiently is the one they want. Kids (and parents) learn A LOT during this process about what they really want, from observing team/coach dynamics, how they feel when they visit classes, dorm rooms and cafeterias, and from talking with other recruited athletes who are evaluating programs. If kids and parents are open to accepting the new information, they may choose a school not on the original short list. </p>
<p>The point of the OV is not simply to indicate interest by the athlete, but to truly evaluate the team and school, and for the coach to make a final decision about whether an athlete fits his coaching style, whether the team likes the new kid, and whether the the coach and admissions think the athlete would be successful and happy attending the school.</p>
<p>Each family and kid is so different in their tolerance for travel, juggling lots of options, and timing the decision to maximize the chances of making a great decision without going crazy with anxiety! What’s right for one kid would make another kid go off the deep end. Trust your gut, parents, and if your kid is showing extreme stress and indicates they are happy with one of their choices, it’s perfectly OK to stop the process and commit. Some kids will be happy no matter where they land: they make lemonade out of every coach, team and school they’ve ever encountered. Some are pickier, see flaws everywhere and need to look at every program in detail to choose the lesser of evils. Whatever your kid’s process is, respect it, try and reserve judgement and listen. If you can do this (and it’s a mighty challenge for parents like me who love to be in control) by the end of all this, they’re going to know a heck of a lot more about this than you will, and will own the decision.</p>
<p>“Whatever your kid’s process is, respect it, try and reserve judgement and listen. If you can do this (and it’s a mighty challenge for parents like me who love to be in control) by the end of all this, they’re going to know a heck of a lot more about this than you will, and will own the decision.”</p>
<p>riverrunner: ^^^ I LOVE this!! So true!! Very hard to not be able to control anything at all - and to remember to allow the final decision/fit/feel to be the athlete’s choice…sigh…! Very good advice, and something for me to remember :)</p>
<p>wilberry228: Most of my daughter’s visits are from Thursday evening to Saturday evening, in order for Friday classes, etc. So, at least just one day of school missed each time, with Sunday as the day to make up the missed work. Busy times ahead!</p>