<p>Thanks for all of the responses. I am sending D off to NYC and have used various threads on CC to help gauge the appropriate amount. Like many of you, I am not concerned about my D’s attitude toward money–if anything she is very frugal whether it is hers or ours. This was a lesson learned in HS because she has attended an affluent public HS and many of her friends thought nothing of eating out at higher-priced restaurants. She had to learn how to suggest alternatives or keep her own spending within some limits or find herself spending all of her pocket money on food. She does have her own earned and gifted (she has saved practically every monetary gift or award she has received since she was young on my advice that she will want it when she is older for travel and other things for which she does not want parental oversight) money from which to draw. It’s my intention to cover all of her basic expenses–housing, meal plan, books, other fees, trips home, clothes she NEEDS because of the big difference in weather–and then give her a monthly allowance that will enable her to do some of what she wants, but not necessarily everything she wants. She’ll have to pick and choose and figure out how to do things more inexpensively. I do not expect her to jump start her earning years in college with jobs based on how much they pay. If anything, I’d prefer it if she would seek out the most amazing work experiences possible that help her figure out what she would like to do with her life even if they are unpaid experiences. While she will be more independent in college and will learn even more fiscal responsibility, I still see her as primarily a student supported by her parents. I do not want her to limit her educational choices inside or outside the classroom because of money. </p>
<p>I do think that a lot of the way I, as a parent, assess this is based on my D’s attitude. Since she is totally accepting of monetary limits and extremely responsible, cooperative and unspoiled, I will probably be very easy going about money if I find that she needs a bit more than expected. I do not respond as well in instances where there is a sense of entitlement.</p>