How much do YOU think YOU need to retire? ...and at what age will you (and spouse) retire? (Part 1)

Parents Forum Parent Cafe
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<p>Thanks for sharing your situations.</p>

<p>@IxnayBob: “But, she gets satisfaction from her work and it is still part of her identity, so I don’t think I’m within my rights to insist.” That is exactly the mindset I am striving to maintain. Thanks for putting it into words.</p>

<p>I’ve been a SAHM/SAHW since our children were babies. A combination of medical problems would make returning to work quite difficult at this point, even if my skills weren’t rusty. My contribution is to run our overly large house, manage our money, etc. Dh is appreciative, and I try to be supportive of his work, too. </p>

<p>Dh works too many hours and he has hypertension and other health problems that worry me. He has reset his target age for taking early retirement three times, but I thought the day was in sight. We have no debt, our savings are enough to provide a more modest but still comfortable lifestyle, and we have funds earmarked for a child’s special needs trust. In the past few months, we settled on the builder we want to build our next house (in a different county), have had numerous discussions about the floor plan, and started decluttering and preparing this house to eventually go on the market. </p>

<p>Out of the blue, we received an offer on our house. It’s contingent on the sale of their house, so it might not go through but I’m hopeful. We were going to rent a condo near the office as a short term residence until the new house is built. I was looking forward to a smaller house on one floor, a nice garden (free from ravenous deer), and a pool. Countless hours have been spent researching landscapers, pool builders, etc. in the new location, as well as mentally decorating the new house. </p>

<p>Now dh isn’t so sure he’s ready to retire any time soon - not this year, not next year, and maybe not for seven years. Plan B is to look for a smaller house much closer to dh’s office. Since we’d be moving from an outlying county to a much costlier small city, the next house may be 1/4 the size but 1/2 the price with the same taxes we pay currently. It’s also likely to be 30 - 50 years old and in need of some work. Last year, I oversaw a repair project that dragged on for over six months. The thought of living through that again is disheartening. It’s also hard to get excited about yet another short term house where I need to keep resale in mind. But dh enjoys the challenges presented by his work and it’s clear he’s not ready to retire, so I need to make peace with the change of plans.
Sure, it’s a first world problem and not much to gripe about, but I am having trouble sounding convincing when I tell dh that I support his decision when I really want to make a big fuss. </p>

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<p>Thumper, if your comment was referring to me, I can see why you would think I asked my H’s “permission” to retire. But that is not how we see it at all. Retiring is a big financial decision, and from the first day of our marriage, we agreed to get the other’s buy-in on all major financial decisions. I wouldn’t buy a big ticket item without running it past him, any more than he would buy an expensive item without running it past me. </p>

<p>We view our salaries as our money, not mine or his. It’s just what we do, and it works for us. Not saying it’s the way others should do it, just the way we do it. </p>

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<p>Sorry if this has been covered but can I ask what everyone’s opinion is on Long Term health care insurance? We met with financial planners last night and they are, of course recommending it. </p>

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<p>Hayden, my husband and I have been working for years with a financial planner, and our retirement incomes are not in question. That part of our equation was dealt with a long time ago. </p>

<p>SO…when I decided it wanted to retire, I did. </p>

<p>My husband plans to work for at least five more years. </p>

<p>I think it is a HUGE mistake for folks to begin their retirement discussions in the years very close to when they plan to retire. I know it’s likely most folks do not plan ahead…but I personally think starting the financial discussion when you are in your sixties, and are ready to retire (regardless of the reason) just isn’t smart.</p>

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<p>@EPTR, yes, of course they’re recommending it. You can find long and contentious discussions about this on Bogleheads, but my take on it is:</p>

<ul>
<li>if the policies available a decade ago were available today, I’d purchase one. They are not</li>
<li>if you don’t have many assets/income (<500k), you can’t afford the premiums, which have (unexpectedly) increased considerably even for long-held policies</li>
<li>if you have considerable assets/income (>2.500k), you can “self-insure”</li>
<li>most of the companies in the business no longer are</li>
<li>some companies have been very difficult to get reimbursement from</li>
<li>see <a href=“Long Term Care | Insurance - Consumer Reports”>Long Term Care | Insurance - Consumer Reports; for a non-partisan discussion</li>
</ul>

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<p>@EPTR, are you sure that they’re really financial planners and not salespeople? Were they going to sell you the insurance? How are they paid? Do they have a fiduciary relationship with you?</p>

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<p>lxnayBob, I am definitely not wealthy enough to be “self insure”, someone has recommended purchasing a rider to our life insurance policy, I have not checked that out it, don’t even know if our life insurance company has that option. Since the long term care policy is so expensive, the recommendation was also to not buy the policy, but when the need arises, i.e. needing long term care, use our government pension money to pay for part of the long term care costs, but then it will mean less savings ability and less money left to kids.</p>

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<p>From what I saw it sounds like he has one old vehicle. I pay about $34/month for insurance, so $25/month is not inconceivable. For me to be covered to state minimums from Geico was only $31.25/month or something.</p>

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<p>What are you going to do? If your chance of having enough money to live the rest of your life is only 50%, are you going to retire? Yes, it could turn out that you die sooner than you think, but there’s not much you can do about that. </p>

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<p>I respectfully would change that sentence to “IF the need arises” rather than when. Many people, the majority, would not need the care, would not qualify for reimbursement, or would not need the care for long enough to meet the “deductible.”</p>

<p>Many of the plans pay between $150-$200 per day, which isn’t that much.</p>

<p>To be blunt, although they were once a good idea, today’s LTCi is sold rather than bought. </p>

<p>Btw, your kids would rather that you spent their inheritance :slight_smile: </p>

2590

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Taking the minimums when you have significant assets and a family to protect just seems irresponsible to me. One accident and he could be bankrupt.</p>

<p>My umbrella requires me to have much higher coverage than the minimum. I’ve been sued before and I will not leave myself and my family unprotected.</p>

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<p>Very funny, lxnayBob, luckily both my kids are both very frugal, not big spender, always buy things on sale, they were taught good saving habits when they were young. My daughter, who has worked part time through her senior year in high school and all this summer, low paying job at a supermarket, but managed to save over 95% of her earnings, I just opened up a Vanguard Roth IRA for her. My son has been a full time teacher for 2 years, low paying job, but he lives at home, and has saved most of his take home pay. I have been a saver all my life, maybe I should start spending and enjoy life when I am still healthy and able to, yes, I think they would like to see us do that! :)</p>

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<p>^ the sum total of my inheritance was $11k, and I wouldn’t have it any other way :slight_smile: </p>

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<p>"Thumper, if your comment was referring to me, I can see why you would think I asked my H’s “permission” to retire. But that is not how we see it at all. Retiring is a big financial decision, and from the first day of our marriage, we agreed to get the other’s buy-in on all major financial decisions. I wouldn’t buy a big ticket item without running it past him, any more than he would buy an expensive item without running it past me.</p>

<p>We view our salaries as our money, not mine or his. It’s just what we do, and it works for us. Not saying it’s the way others should do it, just the way we do it."</p>

<p>That’s exactly how I see it. A huge financial decision that impacts the other person. I can’t see either of us objecting if the other person felt strongly about it, but there’s no way one of us is going to say, “Okay, I’m retiring now. It’s all up to you.” It would be a conversation. Especially since we do exactly the same thing, we know what is involved when going to work. I suspect we’ll put in our retirement papers on exactly the same day.</p>

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<p>It includes 50K for property damage (hard time to imagine I total a 50K car) and 100K bodily injury liability (these are both above state minimums - didn’t add much to the price). Though I suppose it’s possible I hit someone and cause more than 50K in medical bills. </p>

<p>Anyway, I think I was remembering the numbers wrong. My cost is $31.65/month (189.87 for 6 months). I think the minimum would be like $28/month for me. I remember I was paying a few bucks above minimums.</p>

<p>What do you do if you hit someone? Liquidate all investments and take everything out in hard cash? </p>

<p>I take your point that skimping on insurance could be a bad idea, but how much is the right amount of insurance?</p>

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<p>Busdriver and Hayden…please read my response again. My husband and I have been financially planning for retirement for YEARS. YEARS. It wasn’t like I woke up one morning and said “listen honey…I’m retiring and now our income is ALL up to you”. And it was a surprise. That didn’t happen.</p>

<p>Both of us have 401k or 403b accounts (more than one), and other retirement incomes. In addition, our “big money years” (college, mortgage, etc) are behind us. </p>

<p>Believe me, I didn’t retire with the intent of leaving my husband in the lurch with regards to our monthly expenses.</p>

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<p>Coming late to the govt pension discussion but I contribute 11.3 %. </p>

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<p><a href=“hard%20time%20to%20imagine%20I%20total%20a%2050K%20car”>quote</a>

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<p>Why is that hard to imagine? There are many cars, RVs, trucks on the road that are worth that or more. In many states, the minimums for liability are ridiculously (and dangerously) low. No one ever intends to cause a crash, but it happens thousands of times every single day.</p>

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<p>Probably around 1% of the vehicles on the road. I’d have to have the rare event of having an accident, have the rare condition of that be me totaling the other car, and then have the additional rare condition that the car is one of those 1% of cars.</p>

<p>I’m not saying it’s impossible, but the chance is low enough that I’m comfortable with it. If anything is worrying me it would be about the medical bills.</p>

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<p>You could hit multiple cars. And there are other kinds of property besides cars that can be damaged.</p>

<p>You might only wreck someone’s $2k beater in an accident, but what if they are killed or paralyzed? How far is that $100k going to go? </p>

<p>I had a tenant who slipped on a step in a snowstorm and broke her ankle. She sued me for $150K. Without liability insurance I would have had to pay to defend myself ($50K for lawyers, maybe more) and if I had lost I would be on the hook for it.</p>

2600

<p>Yes, liability insurance is relatively inexpensive and, if you have significant assets, important. </p>

<p>I know someone whose mother hit a bicyclist (not hard, but the bicyclist fell).</p>

<p>Bicyclist then claimed back problems and sued for over $1 million, which would have wiped out my friend’s mother.</p>

<p>My friend’s mother wasn’t able to sleep at night with this hanging over her head.</p>

<p>My friend said that if his mother had just spent the few hundred dollars a year to have adequate liability insurance, she wouldn’t have been in this situation.</p>

<p>I had already gotten an umbrella liability insurance policy after I had read an article in our local newspaper about the multimillion judgement against a homeowner because a teenager had been injured going down a slide head first into the host’s pool (after the teenager had been repeatedly warned not to go head first down the slide). </p>

<p>I just figured that if a jury would give out a multimillion settlement even though the teenager had been warned several times, it was prudent to get additional liability insurance.</p>

<p>If someone doesn’t want to have much liability insurance, fine, but they should realize that they then have a large potential exposure (that can be handled at a relatively low cost).</p>